by the way

New Beginnings and the Seeds that were Sown . . . by Heidi Jakoby and Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2011-03-01T10:53:00.006-05:00

Seeds of possibilities!

The past four weeks by the way has been celebrating four years of walking together as an ever-changing community of faith. Feel free to scroll down past this post, to find some of btw’s bloggers reflecting on how God’s grace has been flowing through by the way. This blog posting marks our official point of closure, but the blog will remain online as an ongoing resource for you and others who may be stopping by.

As we close this blog we are reminded of the many seeds that have been sown, those known and unknown. We’ve heard many of your stories of seeds planted, eyes opened wide, walls crumbling down, God’s growth happening in so many ways. The two of us also have grown greatly through this ministry and we have all of you to thank: All 1000 plus of you! We are so grateful for all of you who have taken the time to read what we have written, those who’ve come to chat and/or worship in person, those who skyped with us, those who supported us financially, and those who prayed faithfully for the btw community. Thank you!

It’s been quite a trip to see by the way morphing into different shapes, according to the way we all felt the Spirit leading us. We have the sense of what it is like to be “transfigured”, re-shaped and re-energized for God’s mission to reach out to those needing faith community.

This Sunday is known by many around the world as “Transfiguration Sunday,” and the story told in Matthew 17:1-9 will be the primary focus. Take a look at that story to see a group of disciples invited to go with Jesus to a high mountain top where Jesus was then transfigured before their eyes.

Transfiguration is a marked change in form or appearance, a metamorphosis that reveals something BIG. Can you imagine witnessing something like this? What would a modern day transfiguration look like? How would being present for such an event change your life? Have you ever had a “mountain top experience” an experience that was so profound it forever changed you… as the experience with Jesus changed the disciples with him?

We have had a number of “mountain top experiences” throughout the journey of by the way. Here’s a peek at a few of our peaks:

whenever we tried out a new public location, and there was a “moment” when this new space truly felt like God’s “sanctuary”
whenever we met together to hash out our seemingly insurmountable challenges and ended up transformed by a surprising new insight and direction
each time we gathered for Bread for Your Journey and found that a unique group of individuals was being shaped by God into a community where meaningful encounter was exhilarating
the first time we had over a thousand hits on our blog
when we changed from meeting in-person to meeting on audio-skype, and we realized that God could open us up to each other in new ways through this medium
the times that our ministries led to someone being baptized

You may have noticed that as Jesus and his followers were coming down off the mountain Jesus asked them not to tell anyone until after he had risen. They were asked to wait until the appointed time, when the glory-story would make sense. We, too, need to listen carefully as God guides us to know when to speak and when to be silent. Today we are clear that this is the time to share our ending and our thankfulness.

Telling a story well is like blowing the seeds of a wild-flower into the air, not knowing where they will go or how they will take root. Today we let go of by the way and we pray for the many seedlings we trust God is still tending, that they may grow to help people know the love of God.

We hope that the ways we have shared God’s love has touched you in some way and that you will continue to feel God’s embrace. Please feel free to let us all know how what’s on your mind at this time of closure. And if you have any blogs or websites that have provided faith community for you, please share them in our comments below.

You are most welcome to stop by by the way’s last audio-skype conversation this Thursday (March 3) at 7pmEST, when we’ll be journeying into Jesus’ transfiguration story and praying together for the world God so loves. You need to have downloaded the program from skype.com and have a microphone with your computer (as most laptops do). Notice that you don't need a webcam, since it's not a visual call. Add "bythewaycommunity" to your contacts list on skype, and call in on Thursday.

We’ll close with these words of spirited poetry:

Finish then thy new creation, pure and spotless let us be;

let us see thy great salvation perfectly restored in thee:

Changed from glory into glory, till in heaven we take our place,

till we cast our crowns before thee, lost in wonder, love and praise!

~ from Love Divine, All Loves Excelling by Charles Wesley

Walking with you in the way of Jesus,

Heidi and Kari

(One of btw's bloggers wrote this this amazing piece on the importance of by the way's insights for the whole Church. Don't miss it!)

Dancing, by the way, with God

2011-02-23T09:00:00.002-05:00

Sometimes the song that’s playing in the back of our minds is a gift, if only we will stop to listen.

Right now the words and melody of Donna Summer‘s Last Dance , is the gift that I’ve been trying to ignore but now have turned around to embrace. It’s not that the lyrics are especially rich. It’s just the sense of the song that’s appropriate: the sweet mood of moving to the music one last time before the festive event comes to an end.

Heidi and I offered the invitation to our past bloggers to connect with the by the way community one last time before our closing next week. Dustin Wright responded with his images of God acting though by the way to provide a shelter from the storm when he needed it most. Bill Petersen offered his take on living in the perfectness of God's love for us rather than the perfectionistic goals we tend to pursue.

This week we have two more btw bloggers joining in the dance. And then next week Heidi and I will together compile our last reflections, on how God has indeed been dancing with us these past 4 years… as we’ve tangoed with the texts of God’s Word and the contexts of God’s world, through God’s dancing partner known as by the way.
Kari Henkelmann Keyl

To Linger Along the Water Way by Elisabeth Aurand

The name “By the Way” and the blog’s attendant publicity cards had caught my attention, yet it was some months before I felt I had time… to explore this new “congregation via Skype.” I appreciated the empathetic and wisely reflective voices on Thursdays at 7pm, enough that I wanted to “meet them further on up the road,” (as Bruce Springsteen would sing it ).

I think my image… is “The Way”, a dusty way, tapering into the horizon where it now joins a way of waters. This water “way” still invites one for a journey –past the dusty road and on into the regular current. This is the river with us in our baptisms and it keeps rolling. I hope we who have gotten to know each other here can continue to linger along the water way together now and then.

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Where do you see God? by Anne Roser

How amazing it is when God’s loving and healing presence is recognized in the world! As I have read the bytheway blog through the years, I have seen others point to the holy in new and exciting ways.

Isaiah 43.19 offers these words to us: “I am about to do a new thing, now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.

Who could have imagined that when the internet took hold many years ago, that it would become a tool of faith? Or that social media via Facebook, originally geared for college students, would explode into use by many ages, groups, and organizations for their communication needs? Not to mention other social media inventions!

The science world is always on the fringe of new and exciting discoveries as well. A former college classmate of mine, Dr. Leonard Zon (read more about what he does here ) was recently featured on National Public Radio’s program Science Friday on his amazing work with stem cell research. Do check it out!

God uses what is common to reach us, and that includes the wonders of science and technology. The gifted people of this world point out to us the wonders of life around us. They use what is common to bring new life. And we as well can use what is common to point to the Christ, the light of the world, using our gifts as God intends.

God is ever deepening our desire for what is holy. In ways old and new, God is reaching out to restore, renew, and nourish the world. We are all invited to new life, new possibilities, new futures – and the darkness of alienation, illness, injustice, despair and suffering do not have the final word upon the nations, cultures, and peoples of the world.

Where do you see God? Through invention, science, technology…as well as mutual dialogue, relationship and community, the power of the holy is revealed. New things indeed springs forth, do you not perceive them? Thanks be to God!

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Thank you, Elisabeth and Anne! And thank you to the entire by the way community for joining in the dance. Please add your reflections by commenting here, so we can all sway to the music of your dance with God.

(And if anyone has a link to the song Dance With Me, the one that starts with, "This is holy time", please do share it. The lyrics fit with what we're talking about here, but I'd love to share the music as well.)

Perfect Retaliation = Love for Your Enemies (including yourself)

2011-02-16T14:07:00.004-05:00

Today's post is from Bill Petersen, whose spirited imagination was vital at btw's beginnings as well as at other points along the journey. This being the last few weeks that by the way will be blogging (see the post from Feb. 2), we're hearing from those who have been central in btw's organically-growing life. On behalf of the btw community, I'd like give thanks to God for Bill's gifts and his enthusiasm for coloring outside the lines! ~ Kari Henkelmann Keyl

Is it really possible to love your enemies? Can we really be so perfect? It's a tall order, but it's a challenge that Jesus puts in front of us in Matthew 5:38-48, the big climax of Jesus' collection of teachings often called The Sermon on the Mount (from the 5th chapter of Matthew's Gospel).

In these teachings, Jesus moves from words of blessing to declaring an end to vengeance. Jesus tells us that God’s law (including the command to forgive and love our enemies) is based on God’s unlimited love. Because of God’s love for us, we are not to respond to evil with retaliation, rather love and forgiveness. Jesus goes on to say that living in perfection is to live in the power of God’s abundant love.

Unfortunately many of us see perfection in a less than godly light. We have expectations of perfection demanded of us by our parents, friends, bosses, and if we truly admit it… ourselves. Even Jesus' words at the end of the passage from Matthew can add pressure: “Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” Perfect, a word that I mutter as a curse more than I give as a compliment to myself, or anyone else for that matter… perfect :(

I am reminded of Alanis Morissette’s song Perfect from her 1995 album ‘Jagged Little Pill’ is all about the pressure of perfection that can be piled on children by parents. The song has haunting, pressure filled lyrics that opens with: Sometimes is never quite enough. If you're flawless, then you'll win my love. Don’t forget to win first place, don’t forget to keep that smile on your face…

It goes on with messages for sons: Be a good boy, try a little harder. You’ve got to measure up and make me prouder. How long before you screw it up, how many times do I have to tell you to hurry up. With everything I do for you, the least you can do is keep quiet.

And equally pressure filled words for daughters: Be a good girl, you’ve gotta try a little harder. That simply wasn’t good enough, to make us proud. I'll live for you, I'll make you what I never was.

And ends with the bottom line of: We'll love you just the way you are if you’re perfect!

How can a son or daughter live with that kind of far from perfect pressure…? I think Jesus recognized that there is pressure to be perfect and that as humans we can never measure-up. The law is a gift that isn’t meant to remind that we have to be perfect, but that as people, we can’t be. That doesn’t mean we should ignore it, but admit and ask for forgiveness when we screw up knowing that God loves us in all our perfect and less than perfectness.

There is a current song Perfect sung by P!nk, a singer influenced by Alanis Morrisette by the way, that confesses imperfection and reminds in the refrain that God see’s us as we are, loves us anyway and calls us to live awash in God’s perfect love. The refrain (the clean version here) are words that could be sung by Jesus to remind us of who and whose we are, children of God, made in God’s image…

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel,
Like you're less than, less than perfect.
Pretty pretty please, if you ever ever feel like you're nothing,
You are perfect to me!

The P!nk Perfect video shows the less than perfect life of a girl growing up and the challenging struggles she faces as she tries to be perfect. It is raw, it is hard to watch, and it reflects the difficulty many experience trying to live-up to expectations of perfection. As I watched it and reflected on it, I recalled Jesus’ teaching about loving our neighbors, many of whom struggle with perfection, and how we are called to live in the love of God.

The video, and uncensored version of the song uncensored version of this song will probably never be shown in schools or churches due to its “R” rated material and sensitive subject. But I recommend it because the beautifully crafted video shows a young woman who grows up facing the very real issues of bullying, drugs, self harm and theft in a world that is far from perfect. I also think that P!nk’s song is a reminder that one doesn’t have to live up to any of our worldly expectations of perfection, because to God you are perfect.

No matter what your emotional experience around perfection is, or was… you are made in God’s image. Yes you are flawed, but you are still given life and forgiven your mistakes by God who loves you. God knows every hair on your head, your deepest secrets, and all your imperfections but gave you Jesus to show us what perfect love is, to bring forgiveness, and to remind you that you are accepted with open, loving and welcoming arms by the One who sees you as perfect!

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Bill Petersen serves as the pastor of Faith Lutheran Church in East Hartford, Connecticut and blogs at Signs Along the Way: At the Intersection of Grace + Reality

Shelter from the Storm . . . by Dustin Wright

2011-02-08T10:51:00.007-05:00

Today's post features Dustin Wright: blogger, worshiping member, and leader in the by the way community. This being the last month that by the way will be blogging (see the post from Feb. 2), we're hearing stories from those who have been central in btw's organically-growing life. Thanks, Dustin, for your insightful words here, and for all you have given to this community! ~ Kari Henkelmann Keyl

As by the way continues its journey, entering into a season of change and evolution, I'd like to reflect on how this community's ministry has been important to me, in light of the Bible reading that many Christians around the world will be focusing on this Sunday, Matthew 5:21-37.

At first glance, Jesus seems to be speaking here in very plain language. He tells us to reconcile with others, or we will "pay the last penny". He tells us not to look at others lustfully, or we will be “thrown into hell.” He tells us that all oaths come “from the evil one.” Once some of his prescribed actions are considered however, it becomes quite clear that Jesus is doing more than simply giving commands. Instead of commanding us to gouge out our eyes or cut off our limbs, Jesus is instead teaching us how important our thoughts are instead of simply our actions.

When we lust over wealth, prestige, or indeed another person, we’re already loosing focus on what God is trying to tell us. When we give into anger and dismiss the concerns of a spouse, a parent or even a close friend, we end up violating God’s intention for us to be in community with others. Whenever we lust or don’t work to release anger from our hearts, whether we act on such emotions or not, we’re already distracted from our relationship with God, and life can indeed become a living hell.

Of course, it’s so easy to get distracted! In world that is constantly trying to pull us in different directions, we all need a place that is a “shelter from the storm” so to speak, a community where we know there are loving people that care for us and want to walk with us as we get back on track. The by the way community provided that shelter for me, in a time when I needed it the most.

When I first came to by the way I was in the midst of a great period of loss in my life, and I was grasping at almost anything that I thought might keep me afloat… having recently graduated college into a well paying but life-consuming job, I was living a pretty hedonistic lifestyle in the little spare time I had, longing for wealth and relationships in a vain attempt to fill all that was missing. Every time I took that long drive to Nashua, NH however and participated in by the way’s "Bread for Your Journey" gathering, I briefly had a chance to refocus on my relationship with God. As I got increasingly involved with the by the way community, I was empowered to listen to God’s call, and now only a couple years later, I am beginning my second semester at seminary, on my way to -- with God’s help -- becoming an ordained pastor.

At the beginning of this post I mentioned how by the way is entering into a season of change… and that’s exactly what it’s doing! As much as it might seem like it, by the way is not ending, not at all! Instead, through the ministries of all whom it has touched over the years, by the way is evolving into what it was always meant to be. Through all of us, by the way will continue to have a lasting positive influence on others, be a ministry centered on learning and growth, and most importantly, be a way for individuals to feel part of the body of Christ who wouldn’t otherwise.

God’s peace,
Dustin

Note: For some insight into Jesus' challenging words on divorce, see this translation: Matthew 5:21-37 - The Message ~ Kari

Lights on in Egypt, lights on in us...

2011-02-02T11:21:00.002-05:00

by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

The eyes of the world are on Egypt. Hopeful eyes: Will the protests bring about positive change for the Egyptian people (and others hungry for justice)? Fearful eyes: Will the protests get really ugly, and if they do, who will get hurt, and how will it affect us?

It’s almost as if there is a spotlight shining on Cairo. We hear a drum-roll. We know this is huge. How will this play out? I don’t know about you, but I’m praying, praying, praying. God, be with those thousands of people putting their lives on the line for justice. Hold them close. Move through them that they might be a light to all surrounding nations...

…And a light to us. To us? Yes, God, let the light of those who work for justice open our eyes, too… so we’ll see where justice is needed and act boldly.

How can we be beacons of hope, too? How are we already doing that? How do you see God at work in the world, moving those who are oppressed to speak up, moving those who have lots to take risks for those who have too little?

The whole “beacon of hope” idea is big in the Bible. The prophet Isaiah gets his people pumped up plenty of times by calling them “lights”. He wants them to strive for justice. Do it because justice it's good for us as a people, and good for our relationships with God. But more than that: Do it so God can shine a light to the world through us. This big-picture thinking breaks the molds. This is huge.

Take a look at these beautiful words: Isaiah 58:6-10. Isaiah is speaking to people who think that if only they “fast” (hold back on eating, in the way their religion prescribes) then God will smile on then. If only they worship impressively, God will help them re-build their destroyed country and jump-start their economy. But no, Isaiah says! Live the light that you are, boldly sharing, enacting God's justice, and getting closer to God in the process!

Can you just feel those warm rays shining out of you? They probably are. I bet you can think of one or more ways that your choices help to make this world a better place, ways that God shines a light through you. David Lose, in his weekly message to preachers, suggests that we could each keep a Salt and Light Log, a list of ways God works through us to be the “light of the world” and “salt of the earth” It can get you thinking about how those justice-filled actions affect your faith in God. It could get you asking yourself what God is prodding you to do next.

Jesus is the one who gets us thinking about being salt and light, in this quite famous passage. Take a look at this version (Matthew 5:13-16 NRSV), and then at another (Matthew 5:13-16 The Message), just for fun (and additional illumination!) and to see how two different translators view the words of the Bible.

This whole business of shining your light, and of noticing lights shining in the world, has been so important in all that by the way has been and done these past 4-plus years. The by the way community has morphed a number of times, taken on different shapes to fit how the Spirit is calling us, in order to be effectively shining God’s light to those who might not ordinarily see it. It’s been quite a ride, and I thank all of you for your part in this journey (whether you are reading for the first time or if you’ve been here for the duration!)

Please stay tuned-in this next month, while by the way goes through it’s next morphing phase. We’re going to be celebrating how God has led us and we’ll be drawing our ministry to a close. It has been a difficult decision. We’ve prayed lots and will continue to do so. And it feels right to be moving on.

We’ll be asking you to consider sharing your thoughts on how by the way has been a light for you or has somehow connected you to God and to others in new ways. As always, you are invited to comment below to connect to others in the by the way community. Let us know what’s on your “Salt and Light Log” or what concerns you have for people who are in crisis around the world, and how we can support them and advocate for them.

I’ll leave you with the words of Jesus as I am hearing them today: You ARE my light. Absorb my warming love. Let it move around in you, and then out through you: in bold acts of justice and love.

What’s in your wallet?... or... What do you carry? by Anne Roser

2011-01-24T07:47:00.000-05:00

"What's in your wallet?" Capitol One has made that question a pretty common one withtheir their memorable commercials.

This commercial always makes me think about what I carry with me. Too often the little daypack I carry gets stuffed with too many writing implements, too many tea bags, various forms of ID (hey, I have to keep that Red Sox Nation card!), cell phone, keys, appointment cards, and whatever I use for money these days. Oh, it’s winter, so add the meds and the tissues! And lists, to remember what to do and where to go…it’s exhausting just thinking about it all! Exhausting because as much as I try, there is no way to prepare for every contingency the world throws my way.

Beyond the tangible things we carry, there are intangible ones as well. These can wear us down even more. We might call them burdens, or worries, or doubts, or just plain fears. The school bus is late…has something happened? There are 7 messages on voice mail….that can’t be good! A family member is hospitalized. A national tragedy heightens our anxiety and grieves our spirits. The bills are piling up, and we are being stretched so lean that we feel we will break. These are burdens many of us carry.

Yet, life also includes blessings. Here are some definitions… Burden: something that is carried, something oppressive or worrisome. Blessing: something conducive to happiness or welfare.

Have you ever noticed how some people can endure and even surpass the most incredibly difficult times in their lives? How is it that some thrive despite all that impedes the way of light and hope and love? And how is it that others are easily crushed, broken, or cast aside by the simplest of events?

Jesus has something to say to us about that. Read this passage from the Gospel of Matthew, from the translation, The Message: Matthew 5:1-11

We are told that no matter what situation claims us, we are blessed (we can be content, we can rest easy). We are blessed even when we fear we are at a dead end, or a time of deep despair. We are blessed in the midst of frustrations, calamity, and heartbreak.

Why is this? Because God, the holy One, the One who created you and fills you with all that is good and life-giving, is present. God promises to carry you through the storms and struggles and celebrations and triumphs. You are blessed with a love so fierce, so faithful, that even in the darkest of times, light will make itself known, light that clarifies, reveals, and supports you. You will recognize it because the tables will be turned. YOU will be carried – beyond what you have known -- to a new future, a hopeful future, a future that is touched by the holy.

It may happen in the company of a friend or a stranger. It may be words offered at just the right time. Or you may wake up one day and realize that something you have deeply longed for has indeed come true. And other times, there will be those surprising, amazing coincidences that occur which are all about mystery, a holy mystery, because through these events you will receive what you most need.

We will carry burdens. But blessings are different. They are given. They come from beyond us, and they are gifts. Blessings come to us and bring contentment, joy, and well-being. The most profound blessings take away the sting of burdens and encourage us to live in hope, to seek wholeness, and rest in the promises of God that all will be well.

Julian of Norwich, an English person of faith who lived during the years of 1342-1416, is known for this quote: “All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.” She realized in her life that if “God made it, God loves it, and God keeps it.” She understood each day as a blessing from God. Here is a beautiful example of her words put to music.

So I think maybe Capital One is missing the point. Maybe it’s not at all about what we carry, or what we feel the need to carry. But this I believe: it is all about the One who carries us, beyond what is, to what will be.

May the God of new life, shown to the world in Jesus, continue to carry you and embrace you through all that is before you. “All shall be well” is the promise God invites you to rest upon. May it indeed be so!

Losers unite, and step into the light! . . . by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2011-01-17T13:47:00.004-05:00

Getting un-stuck can be such a pain. Sometimes you just can’t find the right words to express yourself. Or you can’t get your feet out of bed to get the day started. Sometimes it seems like your whole life is frozen. Like you wish you had a giant “Refresh” icon to click, to get a brand new try at making connections.

Being refreshed… sounds so good. Just give me a bit of sunshine, an energy boost, a new sense of urgency for living. New Year’s resolutions can sometimes function that way. Sometimes companies or families or individuals write mission statements, to articulate a vision that will inspire and get things moving again.

I’ve been impressed by the “Six word Memoir” movement started by the online magazine, Smith, encouraging you to tell your story in 6 words. (See Smith's 6 word challenge Smith's Six Word Challenge ). Now that’s not necessarily like finding your reason for being, but it does get you thinking about what’s going on at your very core. Here's one that was recently posted on Smith’s site:

“Born weak. Reborn strong. Thank God”. Sounds refreshing alright!

I keep playing with my six word memoir, but it usually comes out something like this: “God's bridge-building, to me, through me”. Those six words tell the story of how I'm living fully when I'm attempting to build bridges: between different people or different ways of thinking, for example. And in the middle of that bridge-building is where I find God, or probably, where God finds me.

Martin Luther King Jr. Day seems like a great day to get unstuck, to come up with a driving principle, a reason for being… since we’re celebrating the life of one who had such passion for changing his world and knew the words to say to refresh those who were oppressed.

I’ve been musing on what might be Dr. King’s six words. “Fighting non-violently for God’s freedom dream” is one that I’ve come up with.

The Savior that Dr. King believed in had a freedom dream, too. Jesus saw God’s people stuck in the darkness, and he longed to bring them into the light. When Matthew wrote down Jesus’ story, he wanted to make sure his audience knew that Jesus wanted ALL people in that light, especially those who’d previously been squashed down by the powers that be. Take a look at this piece of Jesus’ story: Matthew 4:13-17,23.

There’s no way Jesus will be stuck in one place; he is on the move! He starts out by leaving his hometown to go to “the land of Zebulun and Naphtili”. If you’ve never heard those obscure places, you are not alone. That region was known to be the place of losers, since they were constantly being oppressed by one nasty force or another.

But they weren’t losers to Jesus. He tells them: Repent! (which means: Completely turn around!) because God’s kingdom is within your reach! Right here, right now! Turn away from your loser status and step into God’s freeing power...

What might Jesus’ six word memoir be? How about: “God’s freedom for those squashed down”. That’s what I’m hearing when I read that passage. In this very moment, when I’m trying to write a blog that might somehow bridge someone closer to God, I have God’s freeing power. Though I started off this post totally stuck (could you tell?) and at a loss for words, God’s energy began to flow when I admitted my stuckness and accepted God’s freeing lead.

Like Jesus, Dr. King preached that the freedom his people sought was theirs already. God in Jesus had already given them all the dignity they needed. They need not earn it or grab it or borrow it from those in power. They would wear their full God-given freedom for all to see, and fight for the rights that should come to all free people.

God’s freedom is ours. As we live into it, and share it with others, we can find refreshing energy and God’s own power.

Please feel free to leave your own thoughts or 6 word memoirs or hopes for refreshment, by clicking on "post a comment" below. And for a bit more reflection on Dr. King's Day (and how Martin walked in the way of Jesus), check out this U2 tribute.

Portions of this blog post appeared on btw's blog January 18, 2010.

Come, Live in the Light!

2011-01-10T22:32:00.002-05:00

by Patricia Harris (who also blogs at http://thepastorsmusing.blogspot.com/ )

After following the btw blog for a couple of years, I am delighted by the invitation to share a few thoughts with you…

When the sparkling energy of Christmas is over, it can seem like there is little to look forward to. Many Christian communities strive to continue the Christmas spirit (the spirit of Christ born within us) and let it shine even more! This “follow-up” time after Christmas is called the season of Epiphany.

Take a peek into this “Epiphany” story, where people just like us are caught up in the charismatic light of Jesus: John 1:35-42.

Did you catch Jesus’ words to come and see, inviting two intrigued people… and inviting you? Yes, you personally have received an invitation to “Come and see”! This is an invitation into the experience of being in Jesus’ presence. These words, recorded in the Gospel of John are written for you, as well as the two disciples originally addressed by Jesus.

He said to them ‘Come and See.’ They came and saw where he was staying, and they remained with him that day.” (John 1: 39).

Jesus had seen these two disciples following him at a distance and first asked them what they were looking for, and then invited them to hang out for a while.

Jesus’ invitation to followers is warm, inviting, and down to earth. He calls to them and encourages them to see for themselves. Jesus doesn’t give an abstract discussion of what it means to follow him, but rather shows what it means to be in his company. The disciples came for an afternoon, and after the experience remained his disciples for the rest of their lives.

How do we invite people to join us in following Jesus? Do we give abstract reasons why it would be good? Do we attempt verbal descriptions of what it means to be a follower?

What can we learn from Jesus’ own words: “Come and see”? Come, join me in reading and responding to a blog. Come, join me in a Skype conversation. Come, sit and pray with me. Come, join me at the homeless shelter. Come, join me at the soup kitchen. Come, join me at a worship service. Come and see!

Some of the spirit of this personal invitation is captured in these verses of a poem by Bessie Flint. (The rest of the poem can be found at faithwriters.com.)

For many years the great story has been told,
of the man who walked the shores of Galilee.
We’re told of the many miracles which he does,
to truly believe, you’ll need to come and see.

Oh come and see the eyes that he has opened,
see the lives that he has mercifully restored.
Come look at the broken hearts he’s mended,
just come and meet him, this wonderful Lord.

We are often reluctant to issue personal invitations to others to join us in a life of faith. Our faith in God may seem too personal to discuss with others, or we might be afraid that our invitation will be rejected. Yet, most people join a faith community because they have been personally asked by another person. So… issue that invitation! Call to someone else to “Come and see” and come and experience. Help someone else personally learn the joy of becoming a follower of Christ.

You are the most important component in giving Jesus’ invitation today to “Come and see.” Without your invitation, someone else may never have the opportunity to:

Come, live in the light!
Shine with the joy and the love of the Lord.
(from "We Are Called" by David Haas, from Evangelical Lutheran Worship, Augsburg Fortress, 2006)

You have been personally invited to “Come and see” what it means to be a follower of Jesus. Accept the invitation yourself and spread it further. Put it on Facebook, send a text or email, of just personally ask someone else to “Come and see”!!!

Please feel free to join in the conversation, by leaving your comments and looking out for the comments of others. You can also join in an audio skype conversation Thursday at 7pm (EST), Jan. 13. You need to have downloaded the program from skype.com and have a microphone with your computer (as most laptops do). Then add "bythewaycommunity" to your contacts list on skype, and call in on Thursday.

God's steady pace at Christmas. . . by Luke Bouman

2010-12-21T12:22:00.003-05:00

I am thankful for the opportunity to blog with the by the way community for Christmas this year. I am a longtime friend and mostly silent participant in the conversations of the community. I appreciate the challenges and joys of being in a community of conversation and deliberation. I am humbled by this opportunity to have my words be discussion and thought starters this holiday season.

I was re-reading an old book that has been in my family’s library for years. It is called “Children’s Letters to God” and it was collected and compiled by the editors in 1966. For something that is decades old, the questions and the comments of these children are fresh, amazingly deep and complex for their sources. One of them in particular grabbed my attention as I thought about this blog entry for Christmas. It goes something like this:

Dear God,
Are you real? Some people don’t believe it! If you are, you’d better do something quick.
Love,
Harriet Anne

I suspect this question is on many adult minds as well, especially given the state of the world. The “great recession” has many families wondering what the next year will bring. Threats from war and terror have a whole world on edge. I wonder if Christmas, as it approaches, offers people simply a distraction from all of this bad news? Or are we distracting ourselves because God doesn’t seem to be real any more? I am especially reminded of this possibility as I hear Christmas music blaring from any number of sources. The song, “We need a little Christmas,” seems to be getting more play than usual. This song about the rush to decorate, from the Broadway musical Mame, talks about our need for something to cheer us up. The lyrics are printed below:

Mame:
Haul out the holly;
Put up the tree before my spirit falls again.
Fill up the stocking,
I may be rushing things, but deck the halls again now.
For we need a little Christmas
Right this very minute,
Candles in the window,
Carols at the spinet.
Yes, we need a little Christmas
Right this very minute.
It hasn't snowed a single flurry,
But Santa, dear, we're in a hurry;
So climb down the chimney;
Put up the brightest string of lights I've ever seen.
Slice up the fruitcake;
It's time we hung some tinsel on that evergreen bough.
For I've grown a little leaner,
Grown a little colder,
Grown a little sadder,
Grown a little older,
All:
And I need a little angel
Sitting on my shoulder,
Need a little Christmas now.
Mame:
Haul out the holly;
Well, once I taught you all to live each living day.
All:
Fill up the stocking,
Young Patrick:
But Auntie Man, it's one week from Thanksgiving Day now.
All:
But we need a little Christmas
Right this very minute,
Candles in the window,
Carols at the spinet.
Yes, we need a little Christmas
Right this very minute.
Agnes:
hasn't snowed a single flurry,
But Santa, dear, we're in a hurry;
Ito:
So climb down the chimney;
Put up the brightest string of lights I've ever seen.
All:
Slice up the fruitcake;
It's time we hung some tinsel on that evergreen bough.
For we need a little music,
Need a little laughter,
Need a little singing
Ringing through the rafter,
And we need a little snappy
"Happy ever after,"
Need a little Christmas now.
Need a little Christmas now.

I think it’s clear that our culture seems in a hurry these days. We have little patience to wait for much of anything. We join Harriet Anne imploring God to do something quick.

Now, read the Christmas Story, keeping Harriet's request in mind. If you don’t have a Bible handy you can find the story here: Luke 2:1-20

If there is one thing that strikes me about this story this year is that this is a story about a God who is definitely not in a hurry. God is not doing “something quick” at all. God is acting deliberately, slowly. This story unfolds more than 500 years after the prophets first recorded the promise of God’s gift of a Messiah. As opposed to the Greek gods, God does not inhabit an adult human form, but instead comes into the world as we do, born as a child. This one who is born will first need to learn to walk and talk, to eat and play and grow. This plan is nine months of incubation, twelve years to come of age, eighteen more before ministry begins. This plan is painfully slow, from our perspective.

But the slowness of it is not the only surprise. The fact that it lacks a certain, shall we say, conventional “star power” is also striking. This birth seems to indicate anything but royalty. The place is a simple animal enclosure, not a palace. The announcement is grand enough, but it is to shepherds (folks who were at the bottom of the religious barrel) not to priests and upright worshipers in the big deal town of Jerusalem. Even “David’s City” isn’t rightly named here. David’s City was the above mentioned big deal town, not backwoods, backwards Bethlehem. Almost everyone hears this story today without hearing how jarring all of these things are.

And yet God goes about this slightly off, deliberate, painstakingly slow plan. As it unfolds, I wonder whether I truly understand what God is about. I am in a hurry. God takes time. I rush to fill the void in order, vainly, to try to eliminate it. God enters the void, and by the presence of a child hallows it. I look for some mighty sign. God gives up the mighty route for the simple. I wish to dwell and worship a babe in a manger. God moves slowly, but does not dwell here. The manger is not the final destination for this baby.

It is only when I slow down to match my pace with God that I discover that God is at work in many surprising ways and surprising places. I have heard the calls of voices in our culture decrying that “Christ” has been removed from “Christmas”. But when I slow down, I realize that no such thing has happened. We didn’t put Jesus in the holiday, and no one has the power to take Jesus out. Is Christmas a time when people are hoping for something? Is Christmas a time when people long for more than what mere possessions can offer them? Is Christmas a time when we wish for the peace and goodwill of which the angels sing? Jesus is born into all of our longings, hopes, and all of our pains and sorrows. We do not always express these hurts and hopes appropriately, but even our poor attempts cannot drive God from our midst. The God who chose to be born in a stable comes to the desperate poor and desperate rich alike. The God who chooses also to die reminds us that even in the most desperate of places, God dares to join us. This is what we discover when we slow down. No matter how bad things get, God is right there with us all along, and doing something, albeit in God’s good time.

So I wonder, if we slow down, what other hidden things we might discover about God? Where else does God turn up unexpectedly? How else is God hidden in and with the desperate places of our world?

+ + +

Thanks so much, Luke, for your thought-provoking piece! Please feel free, everyone, to join in the conversation, by leaving your comments and looking out for the comments of others. We won't be having a skype conversation this week or next. But anytime you'd like to let us all know your reflections, please share them here or on our facebook page. God's holying presence be yours, in your joys and in your sorrows, this Christmas and beyond!
~ Kari Henkelmann Keyl

Waitin' on a Sunny Day . . . by Elisabeth Aurand

2010-12-06T21:06:00.005-05:00

Is Christmas just another pain-killer to soothe us, to distract us from our troubling fears? Or can it be a time to go deeper, to look inside ourselves… and ask God to come in, too?

In my lifetime, I've treasured the season of Advent, a season some Christians celebrate the four weeks before Christmas. Advent helps me get ready for Christ's coming. The joys of God's coming to us in Jesus are wonderfully apparent! But we can also take seriously the darker side of life, knowing that God's light is shining there, too.

This Sunday, in many churches that celebrate Advent, there will be two readings from the Bible that bring to life both the light-filled joy and the deep darkness of the season...

There’s “comfort and joy” proclaimed undiluted and unadulterated in Isaiah 35:1-10 . It breaks upon us like warm sunshine as we hear “The desert shall rejoice and blossom; like the crocus it shall blossom abundantly.” That speaks of the joy that the ancient Israelites had when they left servitude in Babylon and returned home to Israel: they found the burning sand, thirsty ground and the haunt of jackals now becoming a pool, and a swamp of grass.

But there’s also sternness from the second text, from Matthew 11:2-11, the story of John the Baptist. He is in jail and hears about the miraculous and healing deeds of his, cousin, Jesus. Nothing joyful happens to John – for example, he is not freed from jail. Yet he has been shown hope through the news of good things happening in Jesus’ ministry that he can hold onto; this allows for his own “patience in suffering.”

From these witnesses you hear what it means to live as a believer, stated well by Evelyn Underhill in Advent devotions, edited by Christopher Webber: The spiritual life is a stern choice. It is not a consoling retreat from the difficulties of existence; but an invitation to enter fully into that difficult existence, and there apply the Charity of God and bear the cost.

The voices witness to the “good bones” of the faith life wherein Christians both honor real life existence with its lonely, dark, cold times and wait upon the joyful work of God. (This work is truly joyful, too — sending the warm sunshine that allows a field of crocus to come up out of the snow and bloom opulently in the spring.) The Advent decoration of choice at Washington National Cathedral – bare pine or fir trees standing sparely in the nave – strikes the balance in the Spirit, with its fresh and fragrant green of life with promise and yet a lack of adornment, like an adult’s sober path through life.

Many folks, including those who are “churched”, don’t seem to know the way of both let-loose joy and focused resolve. I read one church group writing about its leadership as discouraged, worried and “losing its way” as a result of clergy misconduct, and this sounded like an “anti-text” to Isaiah’s words that no one will “go astray” on God’s Holy Way. Leaders hoped for “renewal” yet also cited “questions of relevance” affecting “church attendance across our country” just as if they were a desert that could not rejoice and blossom or the dry land that would never become glad.

But Isaiah writes in chapter 35, verse 8, of a holy way where it’s practically impossible to go astray and a way “home,” insured by God’s love and care. “Home” did not mean perfection, as Paul Duke writes. Yet, he continues, the prophet (Isaiah) declares that desolation, disability, grief and sighing for home will all be swept away, overtaken by luxuriance, liberation, health, strength, safety and multitudes, fools included, singing their way home –and God will send us flowers on the way!

Do we sense we’re on a Holy Way? Do we understand that God’s direction on this way means we will not lose our bearings? Do we find that the things of hope bring enough resolve to endure whatever life throws along the path? I find that many folks (including Christians) at this time of year are mainly given to giddiness, frenzy and "irrational exuberance") –that is, unstable joy and no true sense of “home” in all the frantic Christmas preparations.

The faith life announces seasonal joy, yet wraps it in the conviction of “home” and the assurance that God provides and continues to provide the sunshine no matter what or when the storm. We open our arms.. ready for the sunshine. As Bruce Springsteen sings it, “I’m waitin’, waitin' on a sunny day , gonna chase the clouds away, waitin’ on a sunny day….

Please feel free to join in the conversation, by leaving your comments and looking out for the comments of others. You can also join in an audio skype conversation Thursday at 7pm (EST), Dec. 9. You need to have downloaded the program from skype.com and have a microphone with your computer (as most laptops do). Then add "bythewaycommunity" to your contacts list on skype, and call in on Thursday.

The Chrismas Blues . . . by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-12-02T09:35:00.008-05:00

Departing from btw’s usual format this week (reflective blog, audio-skype conversation), I’d like to offer a brief but important reminder to all who happen to stop by.

These weeks leading up to Christmas celebrations (and other holidays/holy days) can be terribly sad times for many people. Some are missing loved ones who have died, and can’t imagine this season without them. Many are lonely all through the year, and this time of “merriness” just makes it feel worse. Plenty have lost their jobs, have other frightening financial concerns, or are devastated by broken relationships. Lots of pain out there. And inside of us as well.

Let’s take some time this week to pray for all who are grieving, all who are suffering from any kind of loss. Please be on the look-out for those who need some extra care. If you are among the heart-broken, let someone know. Let God know, too. Feel free to let the by the way community know, and perhaps we can share the load together.

Watchful God, you know well who is aching from loss, who needs recognition and healing care. Open our eyes to see the pain around us and within us. Create community where there is none. Mend our broken hearts… and send us out to do the same.

Lord Jesus, we remember you were part of a wandering homeless family. You were born into a time and place where strangers were not welcomed, where the needy were trampled. You grew up in that world and saw God leading us home. Now, Lord, in this time and place, be our home. Give us safety… and forgiveness… and new life.

Spirit of God, implant in our very beings your lively energy, your bubbling hope. Give us confidence in your power over pain and death. When we are doubting and afraid, surround us with people who can be your messengers of hope. In your holy name we pray… amen.

I pledge allegiance to -- what? . . . by Ben Groth

2010-11-16T12:42:00.002-05:00

How many of you have been in a country where there was a real, live, monarch? I’m not talking about the Queen of England or the Prince of Wales, royalty with honorary titles, but about a King or Queen who is the center of power in the country. A real monarch makes commands that others must follow, and a real monarch demands obedience to the throne.

I recently spent a week in Saudi Arabia, a country that is ruled under a real, live King. I found the sense of political authority there to be much different than what I am used to here in the US. In the United States, I often feel that the government is sort of a wide-ranging, but diffuse organization that administrates much of the country. Although I may not agree with a specific decision by our congress, it was usually made by people who were elected by other folks in our country, and I understand that part of the “deal” in living in the US is that the elected representatives may not be who I wish they were, but that they were (ideally) voted in through a fair process.

The full name of Saudi Arabia is actually “The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia,” and the country makes no effort to hide the fact that King Abdulaziz bin Saud is its ruler. On the contrary, portraits of him are a common sight, and many important buildings and institutions have his name in the title. Examples of this would be “King Abdulaziz Public Library” or “King Abdulaziz University.”

Take a look at a part of what serves as the Saudi Constitution (from Chapter 2, "Monarchy"):
Article 5
(a) The system of government in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia is that of a monarchy.
(b) Rule passes to the sons of the founding King, Abd al-Aziz Bin Abd al-Rahman al-Faysal Al Sa'ud, and to their children's children. The most upright among them is to receive allegiance in accordance with the principles of the Holy Koran and the Tradition of the Venerable Prophet.
(c) The King chooses the Heir Apparent and relieves him of his duties by Royal order.
(d) The Heir Apparent is to devote his time to his duties as an Heir Apparent and to whatever missions the King entrusts him with.
(e) The Heir Apparent takes over the powers of the King on the latter's death until the act of allegiance has been carried out.

Article 6   Citizens are to pay allegiance to the King in accordance with the holy Koran and the tradition of the Prophet, in submission and obedience, in times of ease and difficulty, fortune and adversity.

Article 7 Government in Saudi Arabia derives power from the Holy Koran and the Prophet's tradition.

We can see from this example that the Saudi State is very serious about two things, that it is an Islamic state, and that it intentionally centers political power around the King. Article 6 sounds somewhat similar to wedding vows in America, a pledge of allegiance through the best and worst times in our lives.

This Sunday, many Christians around the world will be celebrating Christ the King Sunday, and the question I’d like to ponder this week is this: What would our lives look like if we confessed Article 6 of the Saudi Arabian constitution in this way,

“[We] are to pay allegiance to [Christ] the King in accordance with the holy [Bible] and the tradition of the [Church], in submission and obedience, in times of ease and difficulty, fortune and adversity.”

Christ the King Sunday has a fascinating history, according to this article    by Carey Gardiner Mack:

Christ the King Sunday is a relatively new development. It does not bear the history of many long-held church traditions such as All Saints or Christmas or Easter and does not possess the deep and traditional biblical backing of these celebrations. Pope Pius XI brought Christ the King Sunday into the church's liturgical year in 1925. He was attempting to do several things, but mainly to advance the message of God in Christ over and against that of the political forces moving in the world at that time--people like Mussolini and Hitler.

The idea that Christ is King over and against earthly political forces and not just on the side of our own political forces is something we all need a strong reminder of. However, the best reminder comes not from me and my limited experience, but from the appointed Gospel text for Christ the King Sunday. Take a look: Luke 23:33-43

This is a disquieting image of our monarch, a profoundly ironic text in the light of what we normally associate with “Kingship.” To say, as this reading from Luke implies, that the moment of crucifixion is the strongest argument we can make for Christ’s Kingship is to actively subvert a culture that views wealth, power, and fame as the primary markers of success.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote that “The sermon on the mount is there for the purpose of being done. Only in doing can there be submission to the will of God. In doing God’s will we renounce every right and every justification of our own; we deliver ourselves humbly into the hands of the merciful Judge” .

In some ways, these words by Bonhoeffer are the hardest we can ever hear. When we are directed to a passage  Matthew Chapters 5-7 that blesses the poor, the peacemakers, the merciful, the meek, and the hungry (among others), we are confronted with a way of life that directly challenges how we are taught to evaluate a “successful” life in American culture.

We often work hard to align the authority of the gospel with our positions, beliefs, and prejudices, making sure that our rock and our foundation is built on nothing less than the "Faith of Our Fathers" .

To proclaim Jesus as our King, we must abandon this and put Christ at the center by proclaiming the painful redemption of a broken world, not the righteousness of our own privilege. Some ideas for reflection this week:

• How do our political and social commitments detract from a life led in allegiance to Christ? How are they shaped by our faith? Do we strive to wed religion and politics as the Saudis do, or do we separate them into different compartments of our lives?

• How can we act differently to proclaim our allegiance to Christ through actions, not just in our creed? Where do we actually place Christ in our pecking order of authorities that influence our lives? How do we keep from letting our boss’s directives or media messages influence our decision making more than our faith?

Please feel free to join in the conversation, by leaving your comments and looking out for the comments of others. You can also join in an audio skype conversation Thursday at 7pm (EST), November 18. You need to have downloaded the program from skype.com and have a microphone with your computer (as most laptops do). Then add "bythewaycommunity" to your contacts list on skype, and call in on Thursday.

Even when it's bad, it's good . . . by Elisabeth Aurand

2010-11-09T22:40:00.002-05:00

As the leaves complete their exodus from branch to ground and gaunt November trees therefore appear menacing, and temperatures fall even as we arise in darkness and work the final hours of the day in shadow, we are reminded of dark realities. We can push away the dark thoughts. Or we can talk about them, plunk the fearful realities down on the table. Like Jesus often did.

Take a look at this reading from Luke’s book of the Bible Luke 21:5-19, which comes to us with images of terror: Nations will rise against nation; there will be great earthquakes and in various places famines and plagues, and there will be dreadful portents and great signs from heaven. November’s natural imagery of nature’s change into winter, a metaphor for old age and hardship, is mirrored in texts that speak of difficulty and underscore unsettledness and announce again the fact of insecurity in our world.

As if we needed a Bible reading to remind us! Thomas Friedman's column in last Sunday’s New York Times articulately trumpeted a not uncommon message that has been given to the general American public for some months, Long Live Lady Luck. Friedman reminds us that Americans have either foiled or found lacking 5 terror plots executed against citizens since last Christmas, the most recent of which was the package bombs on the cargo planes, timed to go off possibly when the planes were over our country (maybe even over Chicago – the President’s home and symbol relating to Nov. 2nd, I’ve heard.) Friedman states that avoiding these heinous direct attacks is akin to winning the lottery five times in a row, and he plants the logic in the reader’s mind that such luck may run out any time.

Jesus does not stop with the list of calamities in Luke 21, rather corrals the depressing stampede with instructions about a believer’s protocol during such times: When you hear of wars and insurrections, do not be terrified, he states, or enlightens with the perspective, This will give you an opportunity to testify (in the case of the calamity of persecution.) Then come his divine assurances: But not a hair of your head will perish. By your endurance you will gain your souls.

It behooves us just now to ask, exactly to whom is he speaking. Who will not be harmed when in the midst of such peril, in fact? Who exactly can have this kind of endurance? Is it a group of elite ancient marathoners he is instructing? Visiting Kung Fu practitioners from ancient Chinese civilization? It turns out that the audience is his disciples, though it seems that “all the people” who are nearby in the temple at Jerusalem are overhearing the conversation and, as such, would be a group who wouldn’t display unusual talents or strength or intelligence. Jesus teaches with confidence in this part of Luke and suggests that his followers – any follower- might be likewise self-possessed and a non-anxious presence should threatening events become even more dire. This makes one wonder if Jesus has simply become a little unhinged by now, with his own trials soon upon him, or perhaps just chooses to avoid reality by suggesting a desperate plan to counter worldly turmoil with the confident approach.

Christians do take to heart, though, this approach as an answer to tough times. For we have seen God’s power at work, in fact, even reversing such a calamity at Jesus’ crucifixion -- bested by his resurrection. We believe that the power of God in Christ is truly at work. God’s presence allows for what no one could do by their own skills and therefore people of faith agree with the assessment of Old Testament professor William Holladay: The Bible doesn’t answer why there is darkness, rather offers a vision of how evil in the world is overcome.

Oh God, give us courage that we might stop and let you do what we cannot.
Brother Christ, cheer us with your simple, smiling focus on God’s work and
Holy Spirit, give us the faith to know without doubt that even when it’s bad, it’s good.
(Prayer attributed to Lutheran writer Maude McDaniel)

Please feel free to join in the conversation, by leaving your comment and looking out for the comments of others. You can also join in an audio skype conversation Thursday at 7pm (EST), November 11. You need to have downloaded the program from skype.com and have a microphone with your computer (as most laptops do). Then look for "bythewaycommunity" on skype.

Quick fun fact: By the way has been recognized as being one of the Top 50 Lutheran blogs! Kind of nice to be noticed, yes?

Civility begins with emptiness . . . by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-10-20T11:18:00.004-04:00

It seems we are living in a world where rudeness rules. Incivility sells. We’re being “entertained” by having our blood boiled.

I’ve been hearing a lot of talk the past couple of years about “the end of civility” in America (video ; blog). I’m glad we’ve been talking about it. I hope someday we can grow out of it. But for now, it just seems to be getting worse.

The Supreme Court’s “Citizens United” decision has resulted in a stream of unbelievably uncivil attack ads “preparing” the voters for the upcoming elections. And I’ve been astounded at the disrespectfulness of the debates that I’ve peeked in on.

My 8th grade daughter was given a school assignment to watch a Fox News debate between our state’s (CT) gubernatorial candidates. Having never watched a debate before, she was excited about it. It was fun to see her eagerness to be part of this.

That’s where the fun ended. The candidates spent most of their time making fun of the other, speaking directly to each other in the most condescending of tones. “Bullying” was the word that kept coming to my mind. I was horrified that these two grown adults were speaking this way in front of my child. As she turned off the TV, her dismay poured out: “Are these the only two choices we have to be our next governor?”

There’s nothing new about incivility, of course. There’s nothing new about people being spittin’ angry and playing blaming power games to make themselves feel better or more important or “right”.

Jesus once told a story to people who were prettydam’ sure they were “right”, as long as they could spot a loser to compare themselves with. It’s the kind of “in your face” story that put Jesus on the hit lists of some powerful folk. Take a look, at this link: Luke 18:9-14.

If you’ve read this story before, you may be more familiar with an ending like this: For all who exalt themselves will be humbled, but all who humble themselves will be exalted. I love the way The Message version says it in picture language: If you walk around with your nose in the air, you're going to end up flat on your face, but if you're content to be simply yourself, you will become more than yourself.

Shoot. I wish Jesus would be running for governor.

I suppose with words like that, he wouldn’t get very far in a Fox News debate.

But what if I tried believing that Jesus is present at every debate -- standing there between the debaters with arms outstretched, sighing, crying, trying to tell the bullies they've been redeemed ("righted") already. Sure cools down my boiling blood, gets me breathing easier, makes me hopeful.

This story Jesus tells can get us thinking: How do we talk to and about each other? How do we talk to God? And how does the way we relate to God affect the way we relate to people who are different from us?

Newsflash: Your relationship to God has nothing to do with how rotten other people are. Your relationship to God has everything to do with how open-heartedly forgiving God is!

What would happen to the way we humans treat each other if we truly believed that? How would the incivility factor change if we all talked to God like the tax man in Jesus’ story: coming with open hands, unloading our emotional baggage, standing EMPTY before God, allowing God to fill us with new life and love.

Try out these words of prayer, written by Frank von Christierson. They can be sung with an ancient chant melody called Adore te Devote or just prayed in silence. They just plain carry me into the heart of God...

Eternal Spirit of the living Christ,
I know not how to ask or what to say;
I only know my need, as deep as life,
and only you can teach me how to pray.

Come, pray in me the prayer I need this day:
help me to see your purpose and your will,
where I have failed, what I have done amiss;
held in forgiving love, let me be still.

Come with the vision and the strength I need
to serve my God and all humanity;
fulfillment of my life in love out-poured:
my life in you, O Christ, your love in me. Amen.

Please join the conversation here by leaving your comments and/or coming to an audio skype conversation: Thursday at 7pm (EST), October 20. You need to have downloaded the program from skype.com and have a microphone with your computer (as most laptops do). Then look for "bythewaycommunity" on skype.

Peace, civility, and holy emptiness be yours,
Kari

Pessimism or Persistence… What’s This Life For? by Pastor Bill Petersen

2010-10-12T23:21:00.000-04:00

I’ve been stuck recently by the amount of pessimism in our world today and the amount of persistent injustice through harassment and bullying. One of the more visible examples is the death of gifted musician, Tyler Clementi who committed suicide September 22nd, apparently after discovering that his Rutgers University roommate live-streamed him in a homosexual encounter without Tyler’s knowledge. This harassment went beyond the sophomoric heterosexual webcam scene from the movie American Pie

and apparently Tyler was overcome by a level of pessimism he saw no way out from.

Given the rash of suicides (pessimism with a death sentence) resulting from bullying (persistence of provoked injustice), all I can do is wonder...

• What would be justice in these cases? and,

• What, in light of these examples of injustice, should we pray?

Thankfully God gives us the gift of prayer, a direct connection not for the outcome, but rather for relationship… God wants us to be in open communication, to be real with God, to authentically share our frustration, sorrow and pessimism with God persistently. God loves us so much that God wants us to share ourselves with God through honest, heartfelt conversation. Prayer does not necessarily immediately change things. There will still be pessimism and heartbreak in our lives, but God wants us to share all of our highs and lows with God. A relationship with God is built through ongoing conversation, us talking (sometimes yelling and screaming) and then listening, being quiet in God’s presence.

Prayer changes one self because God can be trusted more than any human relationship with others… and even with ourselves (for we often get in the way and sabotage our relationships through selfishness, control, and impatience). In the book of Luke, there is a lot of encouragement to pray. We are given examples of Jesus' praying, and if he of all people needed to pray, how much more do we need to (if we are honest with ourselves)?

In the story about the persistent widow in Luke, Jesus is trying to encourage his followers to see beyond their pessimism, recent set-backs and disappointments and their perceived lack of response from God. It seems to me that because even the judge caves in and gives justice to the widow, we can trust in God (who is all about unconditional love and justice) will love us and see that justice is done for you and me.

But the world is both good and evil. There is always injustice, someone or some system that takes advantage of the poor, the widowed, the alone, you and me… Harassment and bullying happen, even to the point of suicide. And we wonder, we get angry and we often forget, or defiantly don’t raise these concerns with God (the God who longs for us to do just that). In the end, Jesus' story is not about a sketchy judge and it's not about a pushy widow. In the end it's a story about God and about you and me. This story is about the God who has and will love you always. A God who will always listen to you

and be there for you, no matter what!

In the Creed song "What's This Life For?" the band wrestles with the suicide of a friend and they bring their music as a prayer to God. The band doesn’t sing a syrupy sweet praise to God, but an agonizing questioning prayer to God. Their song echoes the pessimism many experience and the question of life’s meaning in a world full of injustice…

Hurray for a child that makes it through

If there's any way, because the answer lies in you

Their laid to rest, before they've know just what to do

Their souls are lost, because they could never find

What's this life for

I see your soul it's kind of gray

You see my heart, you look away

You see my wrist, I know your pain

I know your purpose on your plane

Don't say a last prayer, because you could never find

What's this life for

But they ain't here anymore

Don't have to settle no goddamned score

Because we all live under the reign of one king

God the king whose reign we live under is one who wants us to bring our questions directly to God through prayer. The story of the persistent widow reminds us that justice comes, even in a world filled with unjust judges and persistent bullies to those who persist regardless of how much faith they have, or how pessimistic their reality.

So what injustice is in your life that makes you pessimistic? And, what, in light of your personal experience with injustice, do, or could you pray for?

Please share your thoughts and comments. If you would like to learn more about Pastor Bill Petersen and his ministry go to http://www.faithlutheranct.org/ .

Wrangling Over Words by Kathi Johnson, MDiv

2010-10-06T22:33:00.000-04:00

I was thinking today about an argument I had with someone once. This argument turned into a real doozy - we were yelling at each other, we slammed doors, and I shed some tears. You know what’s interesting? I can’t even remember what we were fighting about! All I’m left with is the memory of each of us angering the other with our words - words which escalated our emotions higher and higher until we parted for a time to cool down.

After this particular fight, there were more words - quieter words, words spoken in caution but also with love. It wasn’t easy, but we both saw that we had misused our gift of words in order to hurt the other, and we both saw our need to both apologize and forgive the other.

Americans are very concerned about words. I think this concern goes back to our community ideal of free speech. There are many who say that people should be able to say or write whatever they want to, and while I, as an American citizen, am a recipient of this particular gift, I also often wonder: shouldn’t we use our free speech with more responsibility?

When I think about free speech, I think often of what Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 10:23: “‘All things are lawful,’ but not all things are beneficial. ‘All things are lawful,’ but not all things build up.”

“Not all things build up.” In other words, while we can say whatever we want and know that legally, at least, we have some protection on our side, do we ever think about the effect our words will have on others? How much care do we show to others in the use of our words? All things might be allowed, but does that mean we should stretch that allowance to its fullest measure, even beyond human compassion?

The Surpreme Court is deliberating a case about one church’s use of words as they protest at military funerals. There are lots of arguments given by people on both sides - there is a lot of “free speech” language floating around - and a lot of focus on what’s right according to the laws of the land. But - to return to 1 Corinthians for a second - when I read about this case, I am left asking, what about what is beneficial to others?

Down here in Texas, where I live, the political ads for the governor’s race have begun in earnest. One recent ad had a candidate saying that the incumbent is only in it for himself. Lo and behold, a few days later, the incumbent released an ad saying that the other candidate is only in it for himself. I’ve often wondered why candidates feel it necessary to tear down the other, rather than focusing on what they themselves will do for the people?

2 Timothy 2:8-15 has some advice about our words: that we should avoid wrangling over them, because it is that wrangling which ruins all who are involved, and doesn’t do anything for anyone. And so, because of these results, I wonder again: shouldn’t we use our free speech with more responsibility?

I’m thinking again about the times in my own life when I haven’t used my free speech with responsibility. There have often been consequences for what I have said - a relationship has been broken for a time, or someone has been hurt. But, as I think over these times, I am also reminded of the times when I have messed up, and when I have gathered up all my courage to go to that person and I have used my words - sometimes broken and unsure - to apologize. And in return, I have received words of forgiveness from that other person.

I thank God for the times when we do speak or write words which build others up, rather than tear them down. And I pray for us all to use our words well: to use them wisely as we relate to others, and to use them to give our praises to God.

“By your word, eternal God, your creation sprang forth, and we were given the breath of life. By your word, eternal God, death is overcome, Christ is raised from the tomb, and we are given new life in the power of your Spirit. May we boldly proclaim this good news in our words and our deeds, rejoicing always in your powerful presence; through Jesus Christ, our risen Lord. Amen.”
-Prayer for Spread of the Gospel, Evangelical Lutheran Worship, p. 75

How We Argue Fuss and Fight by Kathi Johnson, MDiv

2010-09-16T20:50:00.000-04:00

We live in a complex world. It’s a world filled with many issues, many leaders, many voices – all wanting our attention, all screaming for our allegiance. And it feels to me as though we live in a world which is increasingly polarized: you’re either for me, or against me – there is no middle ground, and there is no kindness if you are against me.

Contrast this for-or-against attitude with the first part of the New Testament reading for this week, 1Timothy2:1-2:

First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for everyone, for kings and all who are in high positions, so that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and dignity.

Prayers are to be prayed for everyone. Not just those we like, but everyone. Not just those with whom we agree, but everyone. Not just those with whom we already live at peace, but everyone. And isn’t it interesting, the direction in which the author goes after asking his readers to pray – he says that these prayers will lead us to “a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and dignity.”

I think that one reason why the text goes that direction is because it is harder to do battle against those for whom we have just prayed. If we are earnestly praying for another person or another group, God has a tendency to work on our own hearts as we are praying for others.

So...do you pray for those with whom you disagree?

Uh oh. Maybe now I’ve scared you a bit! Maybe now you don’t want to pray for (or even think about) That Person Over There because you really aren’t interested in having your own heart changed. You might even think, “There’s nothing wrong with my heart, God! Work on their heart, instead!”

And so, here we are, back to our for-or-against mindset yet again: I’m right. They’re wrong. My heart is right. Their hearts are wrong. And often, out of this attitude, we find ourselves arguing with others, forgetting all about the call to pray for them.

I found an article about fighting at the Psychology Today website, and while the article is obviously referring to arguments within a relationship, I think there is wisdom for how we relate to each other in public arguments, too. Disagreement with someone can be handled in a way which promotes respect - all it takes is a bit of intentional thinking before we speak.

And sometimes we must realize that, even if it feels right, sometimes speaking is not the right thing to do. Sometimes, our words will be lost on the other person or group – and it is precisely at these times when we should pray, lifting up our words of anger and frustration to God, and asking for the right words to speak in our conversations with others.

Think of times when you have disagreed with others - has the conversation been respectful? If so, how was that respect communicated? If not, what can you do (for your part) to make the conversation more respectful?

Let us then live in quietness and peace with others.

Let us pray:
Gracious and holy God,
Lead us from death to life,
From falsehood to truth.
Lead us from despair to hope,
From fear to trust.
Lead us from hate to love,
From war to peace.
Let peace fill our heaerts,
Our world,
Our universe;
Through Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord.
Amen.

(This prayer is a prayer for Peace, found in Evangelical Lutheran Worship, p. 76)

Please share your thoughts here and engage in the conversation.

What will you sacrifice for a thrill? By Heidi Jakoby

2010-09-03T19:18:00.000-04:00

In today’s culture we do not often talk about sacrifices at least not until recently and the current recession. Now as many people have lost their job and their income and investments are not as high as they once were, what do you have to sacrifice? Are you going out to eat less? Are you not going to the movies? Have you stopped going on vacation? What have you been willing to give up and what have you kept in your life?

Recently our household income has decreased and I find myself rethinking what is important. What are the priorities in my life, what are necessities? Years ago when both my husband and I were working full time I didn’t seem to question every purchase but today I even question my $1 Sweet tea at McDonalds. If I save that dollar then I can…

What would it be like to sacrifice everything for someone else? To give up my home and all my possessions? I think most things I could give up, but not everything. If you were to visit my home and complement some nick knack I would likely have a story to tell you about that. Even pieces of jewelry that I own have stories. I don’t think I could do it, yet people lose their possessions every day sometimes because of a fire or maybe a storm like “Earl” which is currently threatening the east coast.

If you needed to evacuate what would you take with you? What really matters?

In the lesson from Luke 14:25-33 this week, Jesus asks us to leave everything behind including our families to realize there are more important things and beliefs than those of our families. At first glance this sounds very lonely, until you realize that he is asking all of us to consider leaving our old life behind and consider this new way of living a part of a group who cares for one another and wants to help each other in all aspects of life. O.k. it is a little utopian but it is a nice thought especially if some of your family decided to come along. Jesus is asking us to take a risk, how big of a risk are you willing to take for your beliefs?

Dietrich Bonhoeffer was a pastor who ended up dyeing for his beliefs he could have lived but he was not willing to sacrifice his beliefs for his life? (Here is a brief description of his sacrifice.)

Dietrich Bonhoeffer lived in Germany during the regime of Hitler. Bonhoeffer was part of the resistance to the Gestapo, and though he lived in America for a short time and could have avoided persecution, he chose to go back to Germany. He went to encourage others in Germany, especially the church, to refuse to crumble before the despot government ruling the country that he loved. Eventually Bonhoeffer, along with other members of his family, were arrested and placed in concentration camps. While in Tegel Prison Bonhoeffer was a source of encouragement to many other prisoners. Even the guards took a liking to him and they often smuggled out his writings and poems. Eventually, Bonhoeffer was executed at the Flossenburg Concentration Camp on April 9th, 1945, just a few days before it was liberated by the Allies. At about the same time Bonhoeffer’s brother Klaus and his sisters’ husbands were executed in the concentration camp at Sa-ches-en-hausen. (The Cost of Discipleship Written by: Hardgrove, Dr. Mark E.)

What would you be willing to die for? Some people refuse to leave their homes even when the government tells them to evacuate. I don’t know about you but I don’t think I would lay down my life for my house?

Check out this article in the New York times Hurricane Earl Clears Beaches of All but Surfers New Your Times Hurricane Earl Clears surfing on the storm waters all along the east coast yesterday and today would you risk your life for a thrill? Many people do, and that is the premise for the many x games that have popped up over the years. Extreme sports are great adrenaline rushes but also great risk.

What are you sacrificing today?

What would you die for?

Have a great weekend and let me know what you think.

Check Yourself! By Heidi Jakoby

2010-08-26T21:07:00.000-04:00

What is our obsession with reality shows about featuring rich housewives throughout the United States. We have Real Housewives of New Jersey, New York, Atlanta, Orange County and now DC???? There is also Keeping up with the Kardashians . I am never sure what all these people do or why they are so famous? I’m confused, am I supposed to aspire to be more like them? Most of what I have seen has been people who are not very gracious, have little to no humility, and at times are mean? I’m confused I thought we are suppose to live our best life; treat others as we want to be treated?

On a recent episode of The Real Housewives of DC, Staci invited her friends to her Aunt’s house for a traditional Sunday dinner, something Staci treasured all her life, most were very polite and gracious and one was completely out of her element but refused to be polite, check out Staci's Blog Staci's Blog. Staci states:

Good manners folks... there is no excuse for mean comments toward people who are opening their home and extending their hospitality, even if "the scene" is different than what you are accustomed to… Her behavior was particularly offensive because it was directed at my family (neck roll, please!!). You can be rude to me, but DON'T mess with my family. It's that simple. When it comes to those I love, I don't care to analyze your motivation, your hang-ups or your issues - check yourself.

I found it refreshing to read what Staci had to say. When I read Luke 14:7-14, I thought Jesus was also reminding us to "check ourselves". Jesus is at a banquet and talks about, his recommendations for the best way to behave at a dinner party. Quoting from the message Jesus says, “If you walk around with your nose in the air, you're going to end up flat on your face. But if you're content to be simply yourself, you will become more than yourself." Do you agree?

Then Jesus says to the host, “The next time you put on a dinner, don't just invite your friends and family and rich neighbors, the kind of people who will return the favor. Invite some people who never get invited out, the misfits from the wrong side of the tracks. You'll be—and experience—a blessing. They won't be able to return the favor, but the favor will be returned.” I love to invite people or give people gifts when they least expect it. Have you ever invited friends from different socioeconomic groups to come together for a meal? What was it like? Were some people uncomfortable?

I hope you take a few minutes to check out Staci’s comments and think about why reality shows focused on the rich social groups in the United States, keep multiplying? Who is watching these shows and what are we learning?

I have spent a lot of time with little children lately and I find it refreshing when I hear please and thank you. Recently I have met a number of children who have not been taught to say thank you or please, and whose parents do not think these are important lessons, what do you think? Is being polite an appropriate expectation? Should manners be taught? I found this great post Nine Steps to Being Polite at a Dinner, what do you think?

Thank you for spending some time reading my post, please feel free to comment!

Which is more efficient? Planning or Living Moment to Moment? by Heidi Jakoby

2010-08-19T23:30:00.000-04:00

Someone needed to be healed so the healer healed them! What is wrong with that? Sometimes you just need to be in the moment and go with what has been put before you. In the story from Luke13:10-17 “the man in charge of the meeting place was angry because Jesus had healed someone on the Sabbath”, but Jesus seized the moment when the women walked into his life. Why would Jesus wait until another day to heal this woman? I have been struggling with the idea that rest is important and I do not rest well, but being in the moment is also an important aspect of living a fulfilling life? Planning and honoring the past; where do they fit?

This week has been all about being in the moment and as you can see this blog did not come together until this evening. Monday at 6:30am I received a call from my friends asking me to watch their daughter as they were on their way to the hospital to have their second child. My answer was yes, even as I needed to head out to help with a summer program for children, that morning. I had a great time and we had some very special moments that day, but I have not been able to catch up on what I “needed” to do this week? What is most important?

Not having any children of my own spending this week with a group of 5 year olds has required me to be in the moment. I am a reality show junkie and one of my favorites is Flipping Out on this show a Jeff Lewis runs his own business with a number of assistants. One of the things he often tells his staff “I want you to be present and be two steps ahead of me”. What is required of them really? As in any job when you are truly present and attentive to your task at hand often it goes easily and ultimately more efficiently.

Was Jesus just being efficient by healing the women on the Sabbath, why wait? Was this just another normal day of ministry for Jesus? When is the last time you felt like you had a normal day? For me this week was no where near normal. Everyday was a new immediate need. When will I have another normal day. People are getting back from vacation, realizing school begins soon and trying to get as much fun into this summer as possible. Do you sometimes long for a normal day? I found this great Prayer for a normal day Prayer for a Normal Day by Mary Jean Iron

Normal day,

let me be aware of the treasure you are.

Let me learn from you, love you,

bless you before you depart.

Let me not pass by in quest

of some rare and perfect tomorrow.

Let me hold you while I may,

for it may not always be so.

One day I shall dig my nails into the earth,

or bury my face in the pillow,

or stretch myself taut,

or raise my hands to the sky and want,

more than all the world, your return.

This was a very special week for me, but sometimes I too long for a normal day. I wonder what a normal day was for Jesus, always being questioned.

Please comment here and let me know your thoughts.

Express Yourself! by Heidi Jakoby

2010-08-11T12:04:00.000-04:00

What do Sliding out of a job and protesting a mosque, have in common? Both of these stories are stories about expressing your opinion, freedom of speech.

Today Steven Slater was let out of jail and there has been an explosion of conversation and opinions about his actions. He is the flight attendant who after having a bad experience with a passenger used a number of expletives over the intercom then grabbed a couple of beers, deployed the slide and slid out of the plane into his car and went home. Quite the dramatic resignation, you can check out the details in many places online. Steve clearly expressed his opinion.

Mosque at ground zero debate. “Approved for New York City buses is an ad which shows a plane flying toward the Twin Towers as they burn, a mosque which has been proposed for the area, and the words ‘Why There?’” There has been great public debate over the building of a mosque at ground zero.

I do not know what your opinions are on either of these stories but what I do know is I am very thankful that I was born and raised in the United States of America where we have the right of free speech. In Luke 12: 49-56 what resonated for me is the importance of having and expressing your opinion, with mutual respect and grace. I believe that through discussion, disagreement and being in relationship we all grow and we are honoring one another. For this blog I looked at a variety of blogs and opinions and I found myself continuously reflecting back on the phrase “Agree to disagree agreeable” which is one of Steven Covey’s Stephen Covey Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Why can't more people agree to disagree and to disagree with love, grace and respect?

As a Lutheran I often view life through this specific lens; what I love about this lens is the encouragement I received to ask questions. The opportunity to have conversations, disagreements and debates about faith, the Bible and more with mutual respect has helped me in my life's journey. Martin Luther was a person who questioned the status quo and who wanted to engage in discussions. My parents always encouraged me to ask questions of people, of leaders and even bosses. The key was to ask those questions with respect, seeking to understand the other person’s point of view. In the story from Luke 12:49-56, Jesus talks about how homes will be divided. Let me share another paraphrase of this story form Good As New: A Radical Retelling of the Scriptures by Rowan Williams

“My mission in life is to bring about a revolution, and I’m longing to see the sparks fly! I have a painful time ahead of me, and I can’t wait to get it over and done with! Some of you imagine I’m going to bring peace to the world as if by magic, it’s not as simple as that! What I have to say is more likely to lead to conflict. Families will be split down the middle, parents and children will fail to see eye to eye, and newlyweds will fall out with their in-laws.”

Then Jesus spoke to the crowds who were listening in to all this. “You’re very good at forecasting the weather. If you see clouds coming up from the sea, you say, ‘There’s rain on the way,’ and you’re right. If the wind changes to from the desert, you say, ‘We’re in for a hot spell.’ Right again! You have double standards! You like to show how bright you are in the world at large, and pretend to be dull! Isn’t it time you learned to have an opinion or your own? Think things out and come to a realistic view of your situation, before matters are taken out of your hands and you find you have no choices left. Once you’ve lost your freedom, it’s hard to get it back again.”

How have you been engaging in discussions about your faith? What are your opinions on this reading? Do you avoid conversations about faith? Why?

David Lose states, “if Jesus' call to a new way of relating to each other – via forgiveness, courage, and humility – stirred up division during his time and that of the early church, what does it bring today?”. Faith and religion continue to stir up controversy but I continuously hope that people handle controversy with understanding.

Change and growth comes from experiences and sharing of ideas. What recent conversations have changed your life or helped you to grow? Were you understanding, and gracious to the last person who disagreed with you? How did you share your opinion? Engage in the conversation, don’t be afraid, assume people will be respectful and listen?

What do you think of the story from Luke, has your home ever been divided over an issue? How did you resolve the conflict? Did you agree to disagree agreeably?

Please take a few minutes to share your comments here or join me on Skype Thursday August 12th at 7PM EST at "bythewaycommunity".

just keeping in touch here...

2010-07-27T22:30:00.000-04:00

To the by the way community:

By the way is taking a bit of a breather here. Summer’s not a bad time for that.

BTW’s adventures in searching for God – active in the world, alive in the Word – will continue. In the meantime, do be attentive to how God just might be searching for you. And if that attentiveness leads to new discoveries or a story to tell, let us all know, will you? Just comment below…

Journeying on with you,

Kari

Connect to the Extraordinary by Heidi Jakoby

2010-07-14T11:24:00.000-04:00

Finding the extraordinary in the ordinary. I am still to this day a person who gets excited about the mail, yes snail mail the mail delivered to my home each day. I am always hopeful that the mail will bring a surprise something unexpected, just like a knock at the door or the doorbell ringing. When I was little the door bell rang often, but today everyone arranges play dates or calls ahead and the surprise, is a little lost in my opinion. On a pretty regular day Jesus came and knocked on Martha and Mary’s door. They did not expect him and there were many chores to be done to maintain the house and to show hospitality. Take a look at the story in Luke 10:38-42 . What do you think? Martha definitely had the gift of hospitality and opened her door and invited Jesus in but may have missed the opportunity to visit with Jesus and be in the moment. Mary disregarded her chores and visited with Jesus. I do not think one woman was right and the other wrong I think that sometimes we do not notice the opportunities before us to be in the moment. To put ourselves in a place of wonder. We easily get caught up in what we have to do and we sometimes don’t ask what are we being called to do?

Let me share three of my own examples from this past week. I had my Niece, Nephew and their Mom visiting for a week as they do every year since before they were born. My Niece and Nephew are 9 and 11 and I used to make breakfast everyday for them, but as they grew I realized that they could help. Yes, it was a little messier but letting them help, teaching them to cook has become a wonderful tradition each time them come for a visit and now it is our time to talk catch up and for them to teach me. I recognized that this ordinary time has become extraordinary.

A second example which stands out for me is our trip to Canobie Lake Park , a local amusement park. This park has history going back to the Vitoria era and it was known for its Dancehall, now redone with a small museum in the back. We entered the park when it opened and left when it closed so you can tell we were on a mission, to get as much in as possible. In the heat of the afternoon we often stop to take in the show, as we did this time. The show ended and we were heading out and my husband grabbed me and started dancing with me. There was music but no one else was dancing, but this was a dance hall. I had two options, say “stop, we need to move on” or dance. I chose to dance, and it is one my favorite memories of last week, my husband and I danced in this famous dance hall. Check out Lee Ann Womack : I Hope You Dance (Lyrics, Video) Lyrics and see what you think about how this relates to Jesus invitation to Martha to come and be a part of the visit.

The third example is about a friend who had surgery Monday and asked me to stay overnight as she needed a “responsible adult” to be with her overnight. The Monday after a week of visitors is usually a day to catch up on sleep and to take it easy but I knew that this was something I needed to do. I knew that we all need help every now and again and it isn’t always easy to recognize when your tasks and plans need to take a back seat to someone else’s needs. I think this video I found from the Responsibility Project illustrates this well entitled Second Line What did you hear?

I agree with one of the many bloggers I read that the story of Martha and Mary:

{Is} really about Jesus and how much Jesus wants to draw each and all of us into a relationship that lifts us beyond the everyday limitations of this life that we might glimpse, if only for a few moments at a time, the sacred in the mundane, the extraordinary in the ordinary, and the holiness with which each and every moment of this life is imbued.” David Lose (to see the rest of what David wrote click here )

Please comment and let me know what you think. We will not be skyping for the next few weeks, so please comment here and let us know when you would like to join the conversation.

I challenge you to find the extraordinary in the ordinary and share it hear.

A Picture of Jesus . . . by Dustin Wright

2010-07-07T00:35:00.004-04:00

When Kari asked me to guest blog this week for by the way, I was frankly a bit apprehensive. I hadn’t done this in a while, and since I’m spending my summer training new counselors up in New Hampshire at Camp Calumet Lutheran, I also knew I wouldn’t have all that much free time to get this post done. Luckily though, after borrowing from some experiences up at Calumet this summer, writing about this week’s gospel seemed pretty straightforward. It’s the story of the Good Samaritan, from the New Living Translation: Luke 10:25-37

Think about what the nature of a relationship between two neighbors looks like… I don’t mean the “keeping up with the Joneses” sort of relationship, or the type where you kill your neighbor’s rosebush for growing a few inches into your yard… I’m talking more about the healthy relationship of two neighbors living in community. In a healthy relationship between neighbors, one party isn’t always helping the other… it’s a relationship that’s mutually beneficial. I borrowed some milk from an older couple next door a few months ago for instance, but I’ve also helped to haul some old furniture out of their basement once or twice too.

Through the Good Samaritan parable above, Jesus suggests to the “religious expert” that all persons are created in God’s image, and thus should be treated lovingly as neighbors. Jesus on the other hand suggests that while not everyone will love us back as neighbors, some folks will act as a picture of Him, even if they're not always the people we’d expect. The song "Picture of Jesus" by Ben Harper, illustrates this concept quite well.

Finally, given the profound effect Camp Calumet is having on me this summer, it’s impossible not to mention how this “picture of Jesus” concept is alive and stronger than ever on the shores of Lake Ossipee. Having been up there for a well over a month now, I’ve been amazed how a new generation of staff members are striving to emulate Jesus’ love and caring for others, treating all campers, guests and fellow staff members as neighbors. It’s particularly interesting that while some staff members are doing that on purpose, others are doing the same thing unintentionally, just by living, working and having in fun in the strong Christian community that is Calumet. Check out this video post from Calumet’s new blog to meet some of those amazing staff members.

God’s peace,
Dustin Wright

Thanks, Dustin, for your thought-provoking words and links! It can be intriguing to notice all the ways that God shapes us to be neighbors for one another... and how we keep finding Jesus showing up in the world around us. All are welcome to join in the conversation Dustin has started here. Feel free to leave your comments below. We will be skyping Thursday July 8th at 7PM EST. On Skype we are "bythewaycommunity". If you're new to skyping, just download the program at skype.com, set up your identity.

Traveling Light . . . by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-06-29T18:02:00.000-04:00

Living with purpose is a beautiful thing. Some of us do it every day. Some of us feel that sense of meaningful purpose just once in a while… or not at all. One of the things we can do to cultivate that sense of purpose is to “travel light”. Don’t get bogged down with so much stuff. Pay attention to all you’re “carrying” that might be distracting you or weighing you down.

Max Lucado’s book, Traveling Light: Releasing the Burdens You Were Never Intended to Bear, has much food for thought on this topic. He starts out with a comedic description of his own boy-scoutish tendency to “be prepared” for everything and therefore leave nothing behind. Then he gets us thinking…

"I don’t know how to travel without granola bars, sodas, and rain gear. I don’t know how to travel without flashlights and a generator and a global tracking system. I don’t know how to travel without an ice chest of wieners. What if I stumble upon a backyard barbecue? To bring nothing to the party would be rude…

…I need to learn to travel light. You’re wondering why I can’t. "Loosen up!" you’re thinking. "You can’t enjoy a journey carrying so much stuff. Why don’t you just drop all that luggage?"

Funny you should ask. I’d like to inquire the same of you. Haven’t you been known to pick up a few bags?

Odds are, you did this morning. Somewhere between the first step on the floor and the last step out the door, you grabbed some luggage. You stepped over to the baggage carousel and loaded up. Don’t remember doing so? That’s because you did it without thinking. Don’t remember seeing a baggage terminal? That’s because the carousel is not the one in the airport; it’s the one in the mind. And the bags we grab are not made of leather; they’re made of burdens.

The suitcase of guilt. A sack of discontent. You drape a duffel bag of weariness on one shoulder and a hanging bag of grief on the other. Add on a backpack of doubt, an overnight bag of loneliness, and a trunk of fear. Pretty soon you’re pulling more stuff than a skycap. No wonder you’re so tired at the end of the day. Lugging baggage is exhausting."
-excerpt from Traveling Light, by Max Lucado

Take a moment to consider what kind of extra stuff you carry… and how you might benefit from letting some of it go. Then check out this reading from the Bible, where Luke gives us an account of how Jesus sent off a whole slew of folks on an important mission: Luke 10:1-9

I don’t know about you, but I would love to be a part of such an intensely focused mission… where the most important thing you have in your pocket is peace. And healing. And some awesome news to share! Travel light, Jesus directs, so you can be focused on the oh-so-vital job I’ve given you. Focused and free.

But let’s face it. Letting go of stuff – whether it’s material stuff or emotional stuff — is so so hard. It’s so hard for me to let go of the little things I’ve collected that bring back treasured memories. Each time I let go is like a little death. And as hard as it is to let go of the positive things, it can be even tougher to let go of the negative stuff that clings on.

…I was hauling those souvenirs of misery
And with each step taken my back was breakin’…

Sara Groves’ and Joel Hansen’s duet, Traveling Light, grabbed my attention with those words “souvenirs of misery”. Why in the world would one carry stuff that reminds you of awfulness? See where this song takes you in answering that question: video lyrics .

There’s lots of wisdom in Jesus’ choice to send out his crew in teams. Loning it doesn’t work. We can begin to drop the unnecessary baggage when we’ve got team support to do it, when there are other travelers walking beside us to keep our spirits lifted. And when that team spirit bubbles up from the love God gives us in Jesus… and not just our own desire to “improve ourselves”… then that love can ripple out from us to affect others on the journey.

Healing Spirit of Jesus, bubble within us that desire to be out there in your world, filled with purpose, loving your people. Help us to let go of all that weighs us down. When that feels like death to let go, walk beside us to show us the new life you would have us find. We can’t do it without you and the people you give us to team with. Lead us on! In your holy name we pray… amen.

Continue the conversation by leaving your comments below and/or by joining the btw community Thursday (July 1), 7pmEST, for our audio skype conversation. If you’re new to skype, set up your identity at http://www.skype.com/, then look for “bythewaycommunity”. All are welcome! Come as you are.

Live, Love, Learn, Leave a Legacy by Heidi Jakoby

2010-06-23T12:50:00.000-04:00

What is the fire that burns in your heart? Are you following your passion or has life gotten very comfortable? Recently I have found my life getting very comfortable, I do not seem to feel the same passion for goals as I once did. When I was in High School my goal was to graduate, then to get into college, then graduate from college, get married, get another degree, have children, get a good job . These were all passionate goals for me. Not all of them were achieved but I felt like I was living life to the fulliest in the pursuit of these goals. Now I have a great home, a wonderful husband, we are comfortable and I don’t seem to have a clear passion or as Steven Covey puts it in his book First Things First I cannot identify “The fire within”. Do you know what your “fire within” is and how to pursue it.

George Bernard Shaw wrote:

This is the true joy in life, being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one. Being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances, complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live, it is my privilege to do for it what I can. I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work, the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.

How I long to feel this way to find my passion again and to live life like Shaw describes. I love the image of life as a torch not as a flame, that are lives are meant to burn brightly and boldly and we are to leave a legacy that we can hand to the next generation. Shaw speaks clearly that we are all connected and that when all members of the community are living fully we (the community) become a force of nature. How amazing this is. Was there a time when you were a part of a group that had a symitry of gifts and together the group achieved greater things than you could have imagined in the beginning? Is this something you want to be a part of again? How do you move toward that passion , that fire?

When Jesus goes out and recruits disciples he is clear that they are being asked to focus on the most important thing, "First things first. Your business is life, not death. And life is urgent: Announce God's kingdom!...No procrastination. No backward looks. You can't put God's kingdom off till tomorrow. Seize the day." How do you seize the day and fully live it? Let’s read the whole story Luke 9:51-62

In this story Jesus also makes it clear that the journey will neither be comfortable or easy. Is that a part of not pursuing your “fire within”. When I was growing up my parents always said they wanted my life to be easier than theirs. I am not sure how helpful that is to me today. I am comfortable but I am having a hard time finding my “fire within”. Sometimes I think that it is adversity or difficulties that help you to find your passion and to think about your legacy. In Covey’s book First things First he says, “The key to the fire within is our spiritual need to leave a legacy. It transforms other needs into capacities for contribution. Food, money, health, education, and love become resources to reach out and help fill the unmet needs of others.” Do you agree? How has this worked in your life?

Take a couple of minutes to think about the legacy you want to leave, Nichole Nordeman’s video touched my heart and got me thinking about my legacy. The pictures of the people and the legacies they are leaving are very inspiring. What will be your legacy? (video, lyrics)

Finally if you want to just take a deep breath, relax and spend 2 and a half minutes viewing this video from Franklin Covey: Leave a Legacy

Please share your thoughts and comments here and join us on Skype for a discussion just call "bythewaycommunity". We will be on Skype from 7-8pm EST, 6-7pm CT 4-5pm PCT. Hope to talk with you soon. Hope your day is filled with joy!

naming the demons, reclaiming the God-in-you . . . by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-06-16T12:15:00.008-04:00

They tried to make her go to rehab, and she said… no, no, no. Singer Amy Winehouse became famous as the Grammy Award winner who won’t go, go, go, with her song of resistance, Rehab (lyrics video), in 2006. She has been in and out of rehab since then, reportedly finding some health, but it hasn’t been easy.

Some of us can relate to the terrible journey of the substance addict who’s trying to get clean… or trying not to get clean… or doing both at the same time. And some of us have never been addicted to drugs. But we can hardly claim to be better than the struggling addicts. We’ve got addictions of our own.

Whether your addiction is – to caffeine or nicotine, to over-exercising or taking ibuprofin, to eating or not eating, to too much screen time or to being connected to your friends 24/7, to blaming others or cutting yourself down — addiction can be one hell of a ride. And jumping off that ride can be as scary as staying on it.

There are these habits and obsessions we get into that help us cope… for a while anyway. But when we see that they’re just band-aids, keeping us from getting the real help/change we need, then it’s time to take them off the “coping mechanisms” list and name them for what they really are.

Naming addictive habits can be powerful. We can name them “destructive” or “hurtful to myself and others” or “what I’ve centered my life around” or “what I truly love and worship even though it doesn’t love me back”. Naming the demons that have attached themselves to us can be the beginning of re-claiming our own lives, of taking them back.

While you’re contemplating your own need to name and re-claim, check out this simple but poignant poem written by someone who’s using poetry as part of her healing journey.

“You've taken from me God's image of me. I'm letting you go, and I want to be free,” says the determined Poet to her Addiction.

A number of writers have chronicled how Jesus continued to see God’s image in people despite the scary demons that had overtaken them. Here is one such person, in Part One of an incredible story: Luke 8:26-31

It seems to me that this person’s demons may well have been supernatural creatures of some sort. But they also could have been related to misunderstood diseases like epilepsy, mental illness, or alcoholism. Whatever is the reason for this man’s ostracizing symptoms, the reality is that he has fully taken on the demon-possessed label that his community slapped him with. He needs a new name. But there is resistance. “What business do you have messing with me, Jesus?!” he cries. This is the way life is with me. Leave me alone! If you take away my demons, who will I be? How will I cope then? No, no, no!

Here’s the rest of the story Luke 8:31-39. Jesus separates the demons from the person. So powerful is this demon-force that it drives the herd of pigs crazy. And the whole thing makes the townsfolk crazy, too. They could handle the crazy man by shackling him. But this Jesus was too powerful to be messed with. Too much change, too fast. They’re more scared of the healthy man than they were the wild one!

But the man who’s been freed has a new life beyond fear. He wants to hop into the boat with Jesus, but Jesus has bigger plans. He can see the gifts in this person. He gives him a new name: truth-telling God-connector. Go and tell everyone how God reached out to you! I know you can!

Try to imagine what might happen if you named one of the demons you struggle with… asked Jesus to help you face up to it… shared your story with someone who would walk with you through the painful changes… learned more about your relationship with God than you ever thought possible… felt the new freedom... and began telling others about what God has done...

Who knows?

Healer Jesus, you have named me as your beloved child. Walk with me as I face up to the habits and attitudes I have that take me away from you. Open my eyes to notice those who need me, those who need you. Help me see the gifts in myself that you see… that I might be a God-connector in the world.

If you’d like to come and engage with others on the stuff I’ve brought up here, please come and join the audio skype conversation on Thursday, June 17, 7pm EST or Monday, June 21, 8:30pmEST. New to skype? All you need is a microphone (most laptops have them built in). Just go to http://www.skype.com/, download the program, set up your identity, and then look for “by the way community”. All are welcome!

Can you see what I see? By Heidi Jakoby

2010-06-09T19:15:00.000-04:00

I don’t know if you wear glasses but I got my first pair just 4 years ago. Have you ever picked up someone else’s glasses and tried to see through them? Sometimes things are clearer and sometimes it is worse. Sometimes we may be accused of looking through “rose colored glasses”. What are your lenses? How do you look at the world and are you able to image how others’ see? Empathize with their point of view?

Have you boldly gone where others were not willing to go? Have you ever been at a meeting where you were just stirring to state the obvious and felt you could not because it was not your “place”, “your turn” or maybe you were not confident enough? Or are you a person who has gone into places and spoke what was needed to be said even though you might not have been invited to speak? Well this is a little of what happens in the story from Luke7:36-50 . Jesus is invited to dinner and his host does not greet him with the usual water to clean his feet and the kiss on his face, but a women who was not invited had no reason for being there boldly went in and washed Jesus’ feet with her tears, dried them with her hair, put perfume on them and then kissed them. Who in this story showed more hospitality? The host who fed Jesus and treated him quite lavishly or the women? With whom do you identify?

My nephew just got back form Uganda where he traveled with Engineers Withought Boarders to help a village with their water. I want to share a quote from his blog (to see more about his trip and the team from Tufts University who went click here )

“Along the way to the village we were greeted by children yelling “mizungu” as we passed in the car, which means white person. For some of the people of Shilongo we are the first white people they have seen, and for everyone else we are still a very rare occurrence and people always stare at us.”

I wonder what the children were thinking on this day. There are some wonderful pictures filled with smiles.

As children of God how do we view the world, listen to the song Through the Eyes of a Child and reflect on how children see the world and how you view your world differently as a child. (lyrics/ video )

In the final part of the story Jesus talks about thankfulness. How thankful are you? How do you show your thankfulness to others? What do you think about the comparison of sinfulness between the women and the Pharisee?

I look forward to hearing your comments and thoughts. We will be skyping Thursday June 10, 7PM EST and Monday June14, 8:30pm EST, 7:30 CT, 5:30 PCT.

If you have not skyped before you just need a microphone, often build in to your computer, set up an account at www.skype.com and then call “bythewaycommunity” anytime during the hour we are online.

Hope to talk to you soon.

Compassion Reaction by Heidi Jakoby

2010-06-02T20:51:00.000-04:00

How often do we hear the word compassion today? Can you use it in a sentence? Can you define it in your current context? When I hear it I think of Compassion International or the commercials of all the children in need. So I started exploring the word compassion because of the reading from Luke this week, Luke 7:11-17 . In this story Jesus shows compassion for the widow who just lost her son and because of this feeling of compassion he acted, so I became curious about the word.

Compassion is the keen awareness of the interdependence of all things. --Thomas Merton

I found this great post by Rev. Frank Schaefer and I wanted to share a short piece (his entire post)
“I got really excited about this story [Luke 7:11-17] when I took my Greek bible out and looked up the actual word used to describe Jesus “compassion.” It is the word splagchnon. It’s not so much the sound of this word that excited me. That would be sad. But rather, the meaning of the term which, according to the dictionary is: one’s innermost self or feelings, heart, affection, love and …here it is: the word for entrails is related to the word compassion, perhaps best rendered in the English with “the pit of the stomach.

Have you ever experienced this sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach or your “entrails” when you heard really shocking news, perhaps about the illness or death of a loved one? Well that’s the feeling Jesus experienced. Wow, he did not even know this woman, really. Just saw her for the first time and yet….he feels for her loss like she was his own family member.”

I am familiar with the “gut reaction” or the “visceral response” but I never thought of these as a compassion response. Clearly I have not had a full understanding of the power of compassion. I know that when I went to New Orleans last summer I was listening to my cab driver’s story of Hurricane Katrina and I could feel his story in my stomach and throughout my being. This happened a few more times as I heard individual stories. I took action, by sharing their stories with others and praying for them. It is amazing how your whole body can react and how that energy can transform you from being still to taking action. When have you felt that compassion reaction? How did you take action? Have you felt compassion for those affected by the BP oil spill? Or compassion for your friend who lost their job? Who did you feel compassion for today?

How do I begin to develop my sense of Compassion? I went searching on the internet for an answer to this question and came across this article A Guide to Cultivating Compassion in Your Life, With 7 Practices by Leo Babauta.

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” - Dalai Lama

I love this quote, and check out the definition of compassion from Wikipedia:

"Compassion is an emotion that is a sense of shared suffering, most often combined with a desire to alleviate or reduce the suffering of another; to show special kindness to those who suffer. Compassion essentially arises through empathy, and is often characterized through actions, wherein a person acting with compassion will seek to aid those they feel compassionate for.

Compassionate acts are generally considered those which take into account the suffering of others and attempt to alleviate that suffering as if it were one’s own. In this sense, the various forms of the Golden Rule are clearly based on the concept of compassion.

Compassion differs from other forms of helpful or humane behavior in that its focus is primarily on the alleviation of suffering.

Shared suffering, keen interdependence, we are all connected and then more we share our life with others the more opportunities we have to feel compassion and happiness."

What do you think? I also want to share a link to “There is always a Song by Compassion Art” (lyrics, video)
I hope you take the time to comment and please consider joining the conversation Thursday June 3rd at 7PM EST and or Monday June 7th at 8:30pm EST for a live audio discussion on Skype.com just set up an account make sure your microphone and speakers work and call into “bythewaycommunity”. Talk to you soon!

I could not resist one final quote:

The whole purpose of religion is to facilitate love and compassion, patience, tolerance, humility, forgiveness. --H.H. the Dalai Lama

Lost in wonder . . . by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-05-26T11:57:00.009-04:00

There’s nothing like a good mystery to lift you out of whatever’s weighing you down. And for the past few years, plenty of people have found their ultimate mystery in the TV show Lost, with its creative twists and mind-bending time travel.

The big news of this week is that the series finale brought all the plot fragments together, and there’s no more mystery to solve, right? Nnnnno, not really. All over the blogosphere you can still see the fans lost in the wonder, continuing the speculation, getting into the depth of the meaning of Lost-life. Here’s an example from Common Grounds Online.

Being lost in a good mystery can be just a fun distraction. It can also be intensely fulfilling, even transforming, life-altering. Mystery can open up our minds to new possibilities, shake us out of the sense that we know it all, keep us on our toes for what might be revealed next.

Maybe that’s why I get uncomfortable when I hear people talking as if they know exactly who God is and what God is all about. Certainty-talk can put me on edge. I’ve experienced the ugliness that can come from two people butting heads with their own “certainties”. But more importantly, I’ve experienced the exhilarating thrill of having two or more people discovering together what’s real and meaningful. By sharing what we know and listening to others, we may not arrive at certainty. But we can dance together in the mysteries, getting glimpses of truth as we go.

One of those mysteries to dance in is who we humans are in relation to God and in relation to all of creation. The Bible’s book of lyric poetry, called The Psalms, explores this mind-bending theme in many different ways. Take a look at Psalm 8 to see one poet delving into the awesomeness of who the Creator is and how we creatures respond. Can you place yourself in that picture: staring amazed at a starry sky, getting lost in the wonder? And then feeling the weight (glorious but overwhelmingly heavy) of the responsibility humans have for tending this world God made (like caring for oil-covered pelicans)?

And since we’re talking about seeing things from many perspectives, take a look at this version of the same psalm from The Message. Both writers are looking at the same ancient texts, drawing out different meanings. We can get into the “who is really right” argument, or we can get lost in the creative tension between them.

Speaking of creative tension… if there is one ancient teaching of Christianity that plunges folks into mystery, it is the understanding of God as “trinity”. Three and one at the same time. Many Christians around the world will be diving headfirst into this mystery this coming weekend. My hope is that people won't get bogged down in getting "the right" understanding, but instead will get lost in the wonder of who God is and how God relates to us!

If you’d like to come and engage with others on the stuff I’ve brought up here, please come and join the audio skype conversation on Thursday, May 27, 7pm EST. New to skype? All you need is a microphone (most laptops have them built in). Just go to www.skype.com, download the program, set up your identity, and then look for “by the way community”. All are welcome!

A final note: One of my favorite songs for getting-into-the-wonder-of-God is “Love Divine, All Loves Excelling”. Check out the lyrics if you like (especially the last line!) or view a choral performance of this engaging poetry about the way-beyond-all-understanding mystery of God’s love for us.

Are you an Adopted Child of God?

2010-05-20T15:27:00.002-04:00

Chely Wright came out as the “first openly gay country music artist” and said on Oprah Wed that she feels like she is “two weeks old”. What a scary, freeing, statement she has been facing. As I listened to the interview on Wed I realized here is a woman brought up in a Christian church who never felt she could live her own truth. She felt she had to hide who she really was. So she began her new authentic life just two weeks ago, a brand new child of God on a new journey but still linked to her old journey. She expressed her belief in God and his ever-presence throughout her life. When she held a gun to her mouth she prayed for forgiveness and her parent in heaven instead gave her the strength to live and come out. What an amazing parent, there when needed, loving unconditionally. Read her story.

As I reflect on Romans 8:14-17 in the beginning we are urged to receive life from God and to live as the Spirit calls us to live. This is a call to be honest with who we are and the gifts God has given us to share. Are you living the life God is calling you to live?

I am a child of God. Recently I read something suggesting that we are adopted children of God. What does it mean to be an adopted child of God? For me it means I have many brothers and sisters and a caring loving Parent, who will always be there for me; a parent who loves me unconditionally. What do I need to do in return? I just need to do my best. To journey through life, listening for God to lead me, to challenge me and to encourage me to share the many gifts I have to share.

How is being adopted into a family different from being born into a family? Do you think we are adopted into God’s family or born into it? What does it mean to be adopted? You are chosen by your adopted parents, and if you are older you have a say in that choice as well. You would move into a new home, be loved by new people, be given new responsibilities and in some ways a fresh new life. Is this always good? Is it always easy? Just like with our relationship with God, sometimes I like having God as a Parent and sometimes I don’t like it, especially when I believe that I am being challenged to share my gifts in difficult ways. I like having God as a parent to love me unconditionally, to show me grace, but it is when God challenges me to share my gifts and find my call and things do not seem clear I am ready to walk away and ignore God.

Back in 2000 I met a young man who talked about his story of not having a father in his life, he was angry until he realized that God was the father he needed and that God was always there and would always be there for him to help. This was at the beginning of his Hip Hop ministry and today he has received many accolades and has accomplished many things, check out this short clip from his song Be My Dad video.

Dave Scherer has a wonderful story about following God and sharing the gifts God gave him. Creating a Hip Hop ministry when he started was cutting edge and now people are trying to copy him and his ministry. I am sure there were ups and downs, doubts and assurances, but following is never easy.

How are you following your passion, your call? How are you sharing your gifts?

Join the conversation tonight at 7PM EST on an audio Skype conversation. You just need a microphone and speakers to join in. Go to Skype.com create an account and connect to bythewaycommunity, you can also leave your comments here.

unshackled ... by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-05-13T11:45:00.005-04:00

Are you free… or have you got some kind of shackles tying you down? Or do you flow in and out of freedom/unfreedom as you meander through your days?

I’ve got a great story for you to jump into, a story that comes from the action-packed Bible book called “The Acts of the Apostles”. My suggestion for getting in deep is to try this: Each time you are introduced to a new character, pause to imagine who this person is and in what state of “shackledness” they are. How is this person bound in chains? What is her/his need for freedom? Then weave in some thoughts about which character(s) you relate to. What kind of chains are you dragging around?

Ok, now head on over to Acts 16:16-34, maybe jotting down your insights as you go... and then come back here for a bit…

When I concentrated on each character’s shackledness, I was most intrigued by the exchange between Paul and the un-named slave girl who could "see" beyond the ordinary.

Here Paul has just had a life-changing encounter with the intriguing Lydia, giving to and receiving from someone so different from himself (see last week's blog and/or Acts 16:1-16). So why is he so annoyed by this other "different" person, this enslaved truth-teller who tells him exactly who he is?

I suppose it would be like passing by someone who’s homeless who looks into your eyes and tells everyone around what your occupation is. It would be a bit creepy. And there’s this barrier between most of us and the street people we encounter. We have a hard time valuing that person. We are afraid. And annoyed. And chained to our prejudiced perceptions. How does God reach out to us to unshackle us from the stereotypes that separate us?

Paul goes on to have this intense interchange with the jailer who’s is most certainly enslaved by the Roman empire, even though he’s got a paid position with them. Paul and Silas save the life of this guy and then end up bringing his whole family into the joy of God’s new way of life in Jesus. Life might not be easy for this family, as they turn their backs on their previous way of making sure there’s bread on the table. But they’re connected to a new family of faith.

So was the same gift of life offered to little girl, who was probably ditched by her masters on the spot? I hope so. I guess I’m left feeling like I want to make this story complete by keeping my eyes open to find someone who is undervalued… and offering that someone some grace.

So those are a few of my reflections after reading this story. I’d love to hear your thoughts. Please feel free to jot them down here in the “comments”, so others might learn from your journey, too.

This week is a bit different for by the way, since Heidi and I both have unusually eventful schedules. We won’t have a Skype conversation discussing this post, but we’ll be back in action next Thursday (5/20) 7pm EST. If you’re new to by the way and would like to see a more “typical” view of the way we do things, please scroll down to the last blog post and you’ll get a good peek in!

I invite you into a time of prayer… God of little and big people, impoverished and wealthy, visionaries and stick-in-the-muds, those who are free and those who are shackled… In this moment, come into the world of my stresses and fears and set me free. Let me float for a while in your expansive grace. Free me from what enslaves me, so I can look at your world with new eyes, with YOUR eyes… eyes filled with delight and compassion and courage. In your name we pray… amen.

Peace to you,
Kari

drenched in words unspoken… by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-05-04T12:24:00.012-04:00

drench yourself in words unspoken
live your life with arms wide open
today is where your book begins
the rest is still unwritten
~ from "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield ~

So often I find myself drowning in thoughts of what I should have said or done… or what my life could have been if only I… How different that is from the mood in Natasha Bedingfield’s song, Unwritten, where the listener is drawn into the unwritten-ness of today, the unwritten-ness of me.

staring at the blank page before you
open up the dirty window
let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

It’s an intriguing idea, the thought of living my life as if it’s a book that I’m writing, using words that no one else would write, not letting anyone else define me. To be always stepping forward with aniticipation, seeing all I encounter with new, eager eyes… Yep. I’d like to live that way. Sometimes I even manage to do it.

reaching for something in the distance
so close you can almost taste it…
live your life with arms wide open…
feel the rain on your skin

I’m thinking of this amazing person named Lydia who seems to have lived with her arms and her eyes open wide. She shows up in the Bible in The Acts of the Apostles, which is Luke’s post-Easter sequel to his book about Jesus. Take a moment, if you will, to put yourself into this story: Acts 16:9-15.

Lydia and company meet at the river to pray. Here come these strange sailor-dudes (obviously not from here), but the prayer group continues on, making room for the newcomers. The strangers soon become friends as they pray and as they listen. Lydia’s not stuck in any ruts of how worship should be and who should be present. She receives the presence-of-Jesus that the strangers have brought. She’s ready to jump into the newness and splash around. Her trusting joy is contagious, and soon everyone is in the river, trying out the baptized freshness, writing new pages in their own stories.

Lydia’s not the only one who’s got an open, unwritten book. Paul and his crew have been wandering out on the windy sea, struggling with which way to head. They’ve got an out-of-this-world-story-of-life bubbling inside, and they’re willing to scrap the old rule book if that’s the way the spirit leads. They join the riverbank prayer meeting, chatting away (with women! highly unusual!), swapping stories (with Greeks! yikes!), introducing the Risen Jesus with abandon. As Lydia received their gift, so do they receive hers. Her hospitality, that is. First they say no thanks. But she insists on teaching them a thing or two: You’re not the only one who’s got some spirit to give!

This spirit of freely-flowing receiving-and-giving continues on in many faith communities, who are opening up new windows to let the sunshine—and the world—in. Check out this one, which just happens to be named St. Lydia.

Please consider this by the way riverbank to be a place where you can be freely writing your own story. Leave a comment and come back to see the comments of others. If you have questions about baptism, about becoming baptized or renewing your baptism, please leave me a note, and I’ll give you a call.

Do take a splash around Natasha’s delightful video Unwritten. And the lyrics are worth some prayerful reflection as well. I would love to know what phrase or image catches your attention! We’ll be diving deeper into all this on Thursday, May 6, 7pm EST, on http://www.skype.com/. Look for "bythewaycommunity". All are welcome. No exceptions.

Flowing Spirit, open my eyes to see the unwritten possibilities of today. Drench me in your refreshing rain of new life. Challenge me to revisit my own closed-off notions that keep me from you. Move deeply in me and through me, so I’ll be offering hospitality Lydia-style to all in my reach. In your name I pray… amen.

If you love everyone do you have to like them? By Heidi Jakoby

2010-04-28T17:20:00.000-04:00

Love - Hate; Like – Dislike, these are the opposites but can you love everyone and not like everyone? In the Gospel of John 13:31-35 . Jesus gives us a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. How do we go about loving one another? Jesus is asking us to love everyone? As I pondered this new command I asked a number of my friends, “What does this mean to you today?” especially in light of current events. I kept reflecting on Goldman Sachs and how they banked on peoples misfortune in order to make more money (or at least that is how I understand part of the situation) did they do this out of love? Or out of hate? Did they just dislike people or were they blinded by greed? The other person I thought about was Bernard Madoff and the Ponzi Scheme he ran from 1960 until his arrest in 2008. How does one live with the pain they have caused so many people?

This command is a difficult one to follow. It seems too big of a request. How can I love everyone? I need to break this down in order to comprehend what I am being asked to do. I know there are people I like and get along with, who are easy to love but how do I love those I dislike or that I have decided to not keep in my life? Those I have never met? That is when my friend Beth gave me a wonderful answer to my earlier question. She said Jesus asked us to love one another not to like one another. “Loving people” she said, “is easier than liking them”. In some ways you really need to get to know a person, their personality to decide if you like them but you can love them, because they are a person who deserves to be loved. I understood what she was saying but wanted to see if I could find anything written on this. I found this interesting article online and I just want to quote one paragraph here but you can read the rest of the authors thoughts here

“I once thought that to care for everyone meant appreciating all personalities and treating everyone equally. I first discovered how impossible and unnecessary it was to treat everyone equally. Perhaps that is when it occurred to me that I did not need to be equally fond of everyone to love them. That removed the feelings of guilt I had when I found that I did not like someone. For me, there was always a reason to dislike a person though. After the revelation, I experienced love for others when I cared about the general welfare of others, tried to understand them and bore no ill-will towards them. In my view, liking people arose through personality preferences and people, even if similar, cannot be exactly alike. This has implications for how you deal with people. I think that if you use "love" and "like" interchangeably, find that you hate many people. Boldly, I would suggest that folks who are so inclined would not attempt to minimise their levels of discrimination. It is perhaps possible to love people at different levels. Arguably, there is no general stipulation that we must love everyone equally. It is because of this that we get the concepts confused.”

Do you think it is easier to love or to like someone?

Do we innately want to love and care for one another as in this quote from Mencius cs 372-289 The Book of Mencius:

The Last Word
All men have a mind which cannot bear to see the sufferings of others. If men suddenly see a child about to fall into a well, they will experience a feeling of alarm and distress. Let them have their complete development, and they will suffice to love and protect all within the four seas.

quoted from Pathways to Peace: Interreligious Readings and Reflections, A. Jean Lesher, ed.

If this is true then it makes me wonder about the homeless man who stopped a mugging and then was left for dead on the sidewalk. Check out the video and article .Why did all those people just walk by and not help? Why did the one person take a picture but did not help? What does this say about us?

Why should we listen to this command by Jesus, why should we follow him and love one another as he has loved us? If you are curious I invite you to listen to this video blogger Dan Brown .

Loving one another as Jesus loves us begins one person at a time and it can be simple.

Join us Thursday at 7PM on Skype for a live conversation. Just log on to skype.com and call in to bythewaycommunity, we will be there form 7PM EST until 8PM, join in anytime, all are welcome.

Love

Heidi

Being known by that Voice I know... by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-04-20T23:48:00.011-04:00

Where everybody knows your name,
And they’re always glad you came!
You wanna go where people know
People are all the same.
You wanna go where everybody knows your name. ♫

This has been one day when I definitely would have appreciated having my own friendly neighborhood bar to step into. I don’t, so I didn’t. But I did make a stop at one of my neighborhood places, out of necessity, to have my new glasses adjusted so they’d stop tormenting my ears. I walked in with all the grumpiness of my day clouding my spirit. And I walked out with a genuine smile, absent-mindedly humming the theme song to Cheers.

I had been greeted by name, treated with kindness, and even had the pleasure of a meaningful conversation. “My” Pearle Vision is a place where they know my name and are always glad I came. And I am truly grateful for it.

Do you have places like this? And do you value them as much as I do? Do you hunger for more of this sense of belonging? This sense of being known? I know I do. And when I get it, I treasure it. I feel like God is at work (or play?) in that place, or in that person, or in that group… whether they know it or not.

One of the most-loved pieces of poetry of all time, the song/poem that’s come to be known as Psalm 23, has this theme of being known. (Here are a couple of versions to check out: Psalm 23 NIV and Psalm 23 The Message.)

Through sunny-smooth times and shadowy-frightening times, God is like a shepherd who lovingly/firmly leads the way. This is one of those Bible passages that some people have tucked away in their memories. When they really need it, they can pull it out… to take them to that place of belonging, where they are known by name, like a sheep that’s valued by its shepherd.

Near the end of the psalm comes a line that sounds just plain gooey-comforting: “Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life”. I’ll never forget when one of my college professors, Walter Rast, pointed out that the Hebrew word we usually translate as “follow” really has more of the connotation of “pursue” or “chase after”. At the time I learned this, I was having serious doubts about everything I’d ever learned about anything, including God. This image of God chasing after me, trying to gift me with undeserved love, even when I was running away, was deeply powerful for me.

At those times when I have no “Cheers” in my life, no place I sense belonging, there God my Shepherd is, chasing after me, pursuing me when my head’s turned the other way. When my day is full of anxiousness and empty of Godness, there is my Shepherd calling out my name, hoping I’ll recognize that familiar voice.

For there are times we don’t recognize the calling, when we miss out on the Life being offered. We need other “sheep” around us to help us to listen and discern where God’s voice is coming from and where it is not. Check out this episode in Jesus’ life, where he talks about himself as a shepherd whose guidance is not always received or recognized as a gift (John 10:22-30).

For some thought-provoking fun, I’ll end with one of my favorite movie images of a “good shepherd”, one who knows the sheep by name and pursues the sheep with love: Babe the Sheep Pig. This link (trailer) tells the story of this unconventional shepherding, and this one (tribute) shows the power of the story to effect even the tiniest of sheep!

Please know that by the way is a place that you can find welcome, just as you are. If you’d like to join in an audio Skype conversation on the issues I’ve raised here, call in and look for “bythewaycommunity” on skype.com this Thursday, April 22, at 7pm EST. Consider as well the option to offer your thoughts to others here by commenting below.

Jesus: Leader or Follower? By Heidi Jakoby

2010-04-14T14:24:00.000-04:00

“Before you can lead, you must learn to follow.” (Dr. Woj, President Pratt Community College)Jesus was not only a leader but a follower. He was able to encourage people to do their best and to continue his teachings beyond his life. The last line of John21:1-19 is “Follow me” why would they continue to follow him? What did Jesus do? In Dr. Woj article he states, “Followership is an art in itself; it’s difficult to define, but it is essential in getting things accomplished. Followers get things done; leaders put them together to make something happen. Let’s examine followership more closely, for without that essential ingredient, success and progress are empty words. Follower is synonymous with disciple, partisan, supporter, advocate and pupil according to my Dictionary of Synonyms. Together, these words explain the characteristics and qualities of the art of successful followership.”

How was Jesus a follower? Are you a leader? Are you a follower? Are you able to flow from leader to follower and back?

If you choose to follow God how is your life different? Today I heard the story of James King the man who found the little girl Nadia lost in the swaps of FL. The headline reads “Nadia Bloom's Rescuer James King: God 'Led Me Directly to Her'”. What a powerful statement. On the interview I saw James said he was praying and God clearly guided him to Nadia. Was this a miracle or simply a disciple listening closely to what God was calling him to do? Check out the link to this story God led me to her . What do you think; was James just lucky? Was God involved? Four days alone and lost Nadia was found, hungry, dehydrated and with lots of bug bites. What a wonderful story of hope and possibilities.

The ability to listen, to communicate and to know when to lead and when to follow is part of our life’s journey. Leaders today need to be less autocratic and more inclusive of others in order to achieve their goals and the goals of the organization they are representing. Leadership today is about building understanding and fostering communication in order to come up with the best solutions to challenges. Do you agree or disagree? Have you noticed changes in the way individuals lead and follow? Have you noticed more people wanting to lead or wanting to follow? Leaders still take on the responsibility of success or failure, do people today avoid this responsibility or embrace it? Yes I know it depends on the individual and the situation but I was wondering if culturally things are changing.

When I first read the lesson for this blog I just kept coming back to the song “Life’s a Dance” by John Michel Montgomery. (video / lyrics ). The need to be flexible and to know that throughout life we grow and come to new understandings is life giving and forgiving. Please take a few minutes to listen to this beautiful song. Here are three versus as my closing thoughts.

Life’s a dance you learn as you go

Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow

Don’t worry ‘bout what you don’t know

Life’s a dance you learn as you go

The longer I live the more I believe

You do have to give if you want to receive

There’s a time to listen, a time to talk

And you might have to crawl even after you walk

Had sure things blow up in my face

Seen a long shot win the race

Been knocked down by the slamming door

Picked myself up and came back for more

How are you dancing? How is your journey going?

Please share your thoughts and comments.

"where Jesus walks and breathes" by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-04-07T16:01:00.006-04:00

So everyone seems to know that Jesus once walked on water. It shows up in bad jokes all the time. But how many people have heard that Jesus also specializes in walking through bolted doors?

As far as I’m concerned, the first factoid, the one that everyone knows, is of little consequence. It’s a cool miracle he did one day. That Jesus walks right into locked-up-tight hiding places... now that’s HUGE.

Here’s the story. It takes place that first Easter day, some hours after Mary Magdalene talked with the risen Jesus: John 20:19-31 (Do me a favor, and when you read the first sentence, substitute the phrase, “fearful of the Jews,” for the phrase, “fearful of the Judean guys in power”; it’s truly a better translation, since Jesus and his disciples are Jews themselves. Thanks.)

So Jesus’ best buds have locked themselves inside. I suppose they’d rather not be crucified (guilt by association, you know), so it’s not so hard to understand. Who wouldn’t be terrorized by the events of the past few days? The fact that they’re scared doesn’t seem to bother Jesus either. He just walks in. He walks in with a breath of fresh air called forgiveness. He shows them his scars. Yes, it really happened, and yes, I really forgive you for not sticking by my side. And I’m hoping it feels so overwhelmingly good that you’ll bolt out the bolted door and give it out to the rest of the world!

A week passes and they haven’t bolted yet. Still hanging in lock down mode. Jesus is patient. He walks through the locked door again. It seems he’s come back for the lost sheep that wasn’t with the crew last time he showed: Thomas, the realist, the one with questions and a stubborn streak. But Thomas is also the one with eyes open wide, hands ready to embrace Jesus, wounds and all.

Score one for Jesus. Now the disciples are ready to get back into the world and spread the good stuff around. That walking through locked doors is a priceless talent. Good thing Jesus bequeathed this talent to his followers so we can do it, too. What are the doors that are closed in your face that you need to yank on? What are the ones that are closed so tight that you need Jesus to do it for you?

We all have fears that make us want to close off part of the world. We may imagine that God is with us in that safe, cordoned-off place, and it’s true. But God’s on the other side of the door, too. And it just may be that God is calling us to check out the other side, to step out and see God, living and active, breathing forgiveness and peace, where we least expect God to be.

That’s the God we see in Jesus, the “out there” God, who will keep surprising us, and will keep walking through locked doors to find us.

To give your imagination a ride into places you may not yet have imagined Jesus walking, give this Kenye West video a try.

And some poetic thoughts from Nigel Weaver, to bring it all together:

The risen Christ, who walks on wounded feet
from garden tomb through darkened city street,
unlocks the door of grief, despair, and fear,
and speaks a word of peace to all who hear.
The risen Christ, who stands with wounded side,
breathes out his Spirit on them to abide
whose faith still wavers, who dare not believe;
new grace, new strength, new purpose they receive…
May we, Christ’s body, walk and serve and stand
with those oppressed in this and every land,
till all are blessed and can a blessing be,
restored in Christ to true humanity.

Feel free to come and take this discussion further in a virtual conversation on Skype, this Thursday, April 8, 7pm. Look for bythewaycommunity. All are welcome. Come as you are!

Going through the motions by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-03-29T22:02:00.003-04:00

Ok, now we’re in deep. We’ve stepped through the Palm Sunday door into Holying Week. Or Holy Week, if you prefer. But there will be a lot of holying going on this week, I can assure you. Keep all your senses sharpened, and you may get in on it, too.

Like Heidi said last post, this all-important week for Christ-followers is a mysterious movement of time which is bookended by parties: the palm-waving-save-us hoopla of Palm Sunday and the power-of-death-defeated yesssss of Easter. So what goes on in between? It’s different for each person, of course. One common word might be EXPERIENCING.

Many worshiping communities will have an abundance of ways for people to experience the redeeming love of God in Jesus. Some may have a gathering every day. Many will have a Thursday-Friday-Saturday experience: three worship events that are linked together as one journey of faith.

Sometimes people bemoan the fact that going to these worship gatherings is “just going through the motions”. As in: is anything really HAPPENING, or are they just doing what they’re doing because that’s what they’ve always done?

Well, I’d like to revive this phrase, asking you to consider that “going through the motions” can be full of meaning. As in: something is TRULY HAPPENING. Like part of you is dying and something new is rising up in its place. Like God is busy… challenging, healing, holying, drawing you close. It might be beyond words or rational understanding, this movement that is happening, but something is going on.

Going through the motions might mean:
+ kneeling and saying I’m sorry
+ receiving a healing touch of forgiveness
+ having your feet washed by loving hands
+ listening to some engaging stories
+ being splashed by some water
+ taking into your body the bread and wine of Jesus’ life
+ hearing/singing some deeply-piercing music
+ watching as the worship space is eerily “stripped” of all finery
+ journeying up to the cross to feel its roughness, its pain, its healing

I encourage you to get together with others who will experience this dying-and-rising with you. But maybe your thing will be to find a quiet spot and do some reflecting on your own. Here’s a suggestion for your reflection: the story of Jesus' gift of life according to Luke.
You could consider all the players in the drama, asking yourself which one(s) you most relate to. What happens to you inside, knowing that this Jesus, who taught and lived the message that no one is to be left out of God’s forgiving love, was found to be too threatening a force, a voice that needed to be silenced? And Jesus kept on challenging and loving, even when it got him headed toward execution. What does it mean for you, knowing that now that love he died to give us, is available to all?

Whatever are the motions you are engaged in these next few days, let the motions speak for themselves, while the message of Jesus’-life-given-for-you sinks in. Know that your understanding of the Cross might be very different from the person sitting next to you, or even the person who’s preaching. There are so many ways of experiencing God’s opening-up love and God’s brand-new life.

Go through the motions. Notice the motions of God. Take it all in. Work it all through in your own time, in your own way. Feel free to share here what you experience, what questions you have, what insights you’ve gained.

I’ll close with this poetry by Paul Gehhardt. I’ve always been intrigued by the question he asks, “What language shall I borrow?”, suggesting that the whole experience of receiving God’s redeeming love is truly beyond words:

What language shall I borrow to thank thee, dearest friend,
For this thy dying sorrow, thy pity without end?
Oh, make me thine forever, and should I fainting be,
Lord, let me never, never out-live my love to thee.

Peace and passion to you this Holy Week,
Kari

Two Parties to Celebrate the King by Heid Jakoby

2010-03-23T17:25:00.002-04:00

Are you ready to Party! With St. Patrick’s Day just last week, many were out partying and attending parades or marching in them. Many people love to party and to celebrate things by gathering together around a common theme. As we enter into Holy Week we begin with Palm Sunday and the story of Jesus entering Jerusalem Luke 19:28-40. Jesus riding into Jerusalem started a party, people were yelling “Hosanna – Blessed is the one who comes in the name of the Lord”, and they were excited and happy. Check out this link to the Musical Jesus Christ Superstar What's the Buzz

I have always loved this musical, because it put an edge on the story and this particular song talks about the good things that can be if everyone just listened and accepted Jesus. At this point in the story the people did not know what was to come, they were on a high of celebration and joy. In our modern world have we as a society been on a real high just to be disappointed or have had to face a tragedy?

Jesus was promoted as the “New King” he did not embrace that label until this day and then he wanted the idea of King to be different than what came before. As Peter Wolf ruminates on his blog Palming off the Donkey King

Jesus could not accept the association with Kingship and rule until he had opportunity to correct the popular experience and understanding of what that meant. Lord knows the current exemplars of kingship and rule were far from Jesus’ concept. ... Power, control and brutal consequences for those who dissented.
This was not what Jesus wanted to be associated with and so he avoids being proclaimed king until he had had a time to reorient his disciples understanding of kingship.
In three and a half years he has modeled what kings are intended to do for their people:
• He has healed the broken and restored them to full participation in community
• He has forgiven those who missed the mark of required ethical and religious standards and included them in his new community.
• He has raised the dead so as to offer social security to those women who would be destitute by the deaths of the men (Lazarus, Widow of Nain)
• He has raised and healed children to break the bondage of bad theology that blamed bad things on parental conditions and culture (Children of Jairus and the Canaanite woman)
• He has been inclusive, unconditionally accepting, and restorative in his words and actions.
This is who kings and rulers are meant to be and now it is time for him to own the archetype and to associate with the kingship that the stoned prophets were trying to bring to the palaces of Palestine.(yes probably both meanings of “stoned”, they were high on God remember?)

Who have we viewed as kings and how have we celebrated them, Elvis Presley the “King of Rock N Roll” or Michael Jackson the “King of Pop”. Currently the Newseum in Washington has a special exhibit on Elvis Presley check out the promotional video.

Both of these popular “Kings” died at an early age, both had and still have a following throughout the world. What makes these individuals so different? What do you think? How do you decide who to follow? As I reflect on the life of Elvis and Michael Jackson, I just wonder why they both turned to drugs at some point. How difficult is it to be referred to as King?

For Jesus it was more difficult than we could imagine. Inviting everyone to follow a very different kind of king led to suffering and death, but also to new life. By giving his life for all, Jesus brought the whole broken humanity into God’s arms; to find healing; to find a different way to live. To find Life-for-all that’s truly worth partying about! It’s a mystery that’s hard to explain. You almost have to experience it and then talk it over with a friend or two.

That's what Holy Week is all about. You've got the week book-ended with parties: the palm-waving party for the King-on-a-donkey (a wild new kind of peace-making King) and then the biggest party of the year: the joy of Easter (the King is back!). In between, you get to live through the reasons for all the partying. I encourage you to attend as many Holy Week gatherings as you can in order to live the journey, in real time. Please come back to the blog or to our facebook page to share your experience. If you need help finding a place to go in your community please e-mail us at www.bytheway.nashua@gmail.com and we would be happy to help you.

Don’t forget we will be on Skype “bythewaycommunity” this Thursday March 25th from 7-8 PM for conversation.

Your comments are appreciated.

Giving: Obligation or Love? by Heidi Jakoby

2010-03-17T14:47:00.001-04:00

Do you give out of obligation or out of love? Passionate giving feels very different from obligatory giving? What do you feel when you give? I grew up in a family where my parents were careful about giving my brothers and me gifts of equal value. Did the monetary value matter or was it the love and the non wrap-able gifts that matter the most? Do they matter equally? As we look at John 12:1-8 John 12:1-8 I want to focus on Mary and the passionate love she gave Jesus along with a monetarily valuable gift. What was the true gift? What did Mary receive in this exchange? Was Judas’ comment just a comment of a “realist”?

In the book Giving to God: The Bible’s Good News about Living a Generous Life the author Mark Allan Powell shares a childhood story of having to buy flowers for the dinner table and carry them home through the neighborhood and how he felt embarrassed versus when he was a young man buying flowers for a women he loved and how proud he felt. What was the difference in these two scenarios? When he was buying flowers for the young woman he loved he did not care what anyone thought or if this was a practical gift just that he wanted to get her flowers because he loved her.

I found this great article in The New York Times entitled: A Gift that Gives Right Back? The Giving Itself

This article talks about what the giver gets out of giving and that if you are someone who tells people not to give them a gift you are not showing care for that other person. Tara Parker-Pope writes: “People who refuse to accept or exchange gifts during the holidays, these experts say, may be missing out on an important connection with family and friends. ‘That doesn’t do a service to the relationship,’ said Ellen J. Langer, a Harvard psychology professor. ‘If I don’t let you give me a gift, then I’m not encouraging you to think about me and think about things I like. I am preventing you from experiencing the joy of engaging in all those activities. You do people a disservice by not giving them the gift of giving.’”

Do you agree? I know I love to give gifts and when my parents asked my husband and I to no longer “buy” them a gift I found ways of working around this request and to still “give” them gifts. I love the challenge. I also shop for gifts for people all the time. Each person is unique and I love to bring a smile to their face and to show them love.

As I was surfing the web I found a link to Jaeson Ma a musician and Pastor who has embarked on telling stories of love and challenging all of us to spread a little love. He has a variety of videos and writings about what I would call “acts of kindness” he calls these “365 Days of Love” here is a link about the gift of a SMILE and the difference it can make.

Gifts do not need to cost you anything but time and love. What gifts can you give each day? What do you think about the difference in giving out of obligation or from love? How does giving anonymously feel differently than giving in person? What does this stir up in you as we continue our journey to Easter, to the gift of Jesus Christ dying for our sins, the ultimate gift? Who would you give your life for? Family, friends, enemies?

Please add your thoughts and comments here and feel free to join us Thursday March 18th in person at the Crowne Plaza, Nashua NH off of exit 8.

May you receive an unexpected gift today!

God is a loony dad (or mom)

2010-03-09T03:11:00.010-05:00

by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

It’s no secret that parents sometimes do crazy things, embarrassing things that send their own children into near panic-attacks. Often those loony things are done due to loony-level love, a love so deep and fervent that it loses sight of what the rest of the world deems appropriate.

When Sandra Bullock accepted her Academy Award last Sunday night, she gave a prize part of her “I’d like to thank…” speech to some such crazily loving people. She thanked those whom she said her film about a risky adoption,The Blind Side, was all about: “those moms that take care of the babies and the children no matter where they come from”.

She then went on to thank her own mother who taught her “there is no race, no religion, no class system, no color, nothing, no sexual orientation that makes us better than anyone else. We are all deserving of love.”

That assertion that we are all deserving of love does not seem so terribly unusual. But actually living out that claim can easily take us into the quite counter-cultural.

Here enters our counter-cultural, crazily-loving God.

In last week’s blog, Heidi referenced a Boston Globe op-ed piece by James Carroll who amazingly has managed to get some pretty good theology into a newspaper. A few of his powerful words have been echoing in my brain ever since: “God is not an executioner,” he writes, adding: “God is not a nanny either.” I couldn’t agree more. But if God does not fit the common stereotype, the one who tempers life’s chaos by disciplining the bad and coddling the good, then who is God?

I’m pretty sure that this is just the kind of question that would have made the eyes of Jesus shine bright with eagerness-to-respond. And you can bet that he wouldn’t give a treatise on the topic. He’d tell a story. A story like this one: Luke 15:11-32.

Now it would be all too easy to see this as a tame story about a naturally kind and welcoming God. After all, how unusual is it for an adult child to return to the homestead after finding it impossible to make it on his or her own? Not very. And plenty of parents are opening their arms to welcome their children home… because it makes good economic sense, and because the parents love their kids enough to put up with the inconvenience.

But back in Jesus’ time, this story would have had much more bite. Just the thought of a son abandoning his father’s land and wasting a slice of the family fortune on a fling... would have deeply enraged the listeners. Such humiliation this father would face in his community! And honor was not a luxury; it was a matter of life and death. Live honorably and you have the protection of the clan. To break the rules of honor is to risk living separately and dangerously. The only way he could even partially claim back his honor would be to declare his wayward son to be dead and gone.

When the son comes home in desperation, the father does the impossibly crazy thing. What he should do is look the other way and say, “You are not my son; my son is dead.” But this dad is so wildly in love with his wild son that he risks everything to sew back up what has been torn apart. He runs out to meet his son, an extremely shameful thing for an elder to do, probably racing to save his child from the angry mob of folks who would lynch the wicked kid in a heartbeat.

This loony dad does so much more than that. His joy at seeing his lost son spills out all over the place. The fact that he chooses barbecued beef for the welcome-home party means that he intends to bring the entire community together, eating the best meat, drinking the finest wine, having a blast. The only ticket you need to get into this rocking feast is the ability to embrace this crazy guy’s outrageously-forgiving, passionately-reconciling way of loving.

So… do you think this crazy parent would actually get people to come to the feast or would they just lynch the father and son together? In Jesus’ story, the music and dancing invites all to come in, even the resistant older brother. But in Jesus’ life, it’s a different story. As Jesus invites all to come into the party of God’s generous love that knows no boundary lines… he must truly put his own life on the line to give that love.

What would it mean for us to take this risky, boundary-less love into our lives? What grudges would we feel compelled to give up? What prejudices would start to melt? What healing of relationships might be born? What self-hatred could be disarmed and forgiven?

So what you’re saying, Jesus, is that God is a loony parent, right? One that will always mess up our categories of what is appropriate and expected. God runs toward us to forgive and heal us, even when we are running away. God adopts us into the family no matter where we come from, and in the joy of that love we do the same for others. God is so determined to bring together all of God’s children that God will do anything to draw us close… close to God’s heart… and close to one another.

Feel free to jot your thoughts down in our comments and/or join in our audio skype conversation 7pm (EST) on Thursday, March 11, when we'll dig into this some more. (If you're new to this, create a skype identity and contact bythewaycommunity).
For more reading on the power of this story in Jesus' culture and in our time as well, check out "The Parable of the Dysfunctional Family" by Barbara Brown Taylor. It is an amazing read.

If quiet contemplation's what you're after, here's a song (sung by Amy Grant) to get you thinking/feeling about coming home to the God who waits for you, called Softly and Tenderly.

Are we doing what we are suppose to be doing? by Heidi Jakoby

2010-03-03T23:10:00.000-05:00

What is God calling us to do? To care and love one another. To treat others as we would like to be treated. Trust, respect, help one another. How do you describe what we as human beings are suppose to do as we are in relationship with others.

As in the reading from Luke 13: 1-9 Jesus talks about loss and tragedy and how one can become lost based on the choices they make. At the end of this reading Jesus talks about a Fig tree that is about to be cut down because it has not given any fruit. The gardener interrupts and says he will tend this tree and give it more time to bear good fruit. I love this image of tending, and caring for the tree. I often think of the people with whom I am in relationship; how do they care for me and help me to be a better person and how do I help them? Being in relationship with others is vital to our growth and understanding of who we are and what we are called to do.

With the earthquake in Haiti we have witnessed many people doing their best to help the people affected, by donating money, items and their time. Do you agree with Pat Robinson who said the Haitian people "made a pack with the devil" and that is why the earthquake happened? Or do you think that God is with the people of Haiti and showing grace and mercy through those who are helping. James Carroll, in his article Haiti and God gives a great commentary on God's presence in Haiti. What do you think of his article? How does this inform your understanding of Luke?

Finally, as I reflect on these readings I think about how I live each day. I believe I am asked by God to be in relationship with others and to be the best, loving, caring person I can be. I know I will make mistakes and that I am imperfect but as long as I do my best I will have a good day. Check out this song by Lenka
Live Like You Were Dying What does it mean to you to live like you were dying? Would you travel, would you quit work or would you continue to be the best person you can be each day? What is your answer?

Please share your thoughts and consider joining us for an in person conversation at Panera on Amherst Street in Nashu NH on Thursday March 4. We would like to hear from you.

The Journey Continues: Success or Failure by Heidi Jakoby

2010-02-24T18:33:00.001-05:00

Jesus is heading to Jerusalem and is finishing his mission. Where are you on your mission? Where are you on your journey? (Luke 13:31-35) Yesterday the Canadian Joannie Rochette competed in the Women’s figure Skating Olympic competition just two days after her mother unexpectedly passed away. What an unbelievable performance she had. She skated well and with great emotion. At the end of her short program I could feel her grief and the grief of her father, all the way into my living room. She has been on this journey to the Olympics for a long time and she did not expect to be competing without her mother watching. How do you cope when your journey takes a turn you do not expect?

Goals, missions, expectations, plans what are yours? What are the ones you hold for others? How do you know what direction to go in? In some ways Jesus was lucky. He clearly knew what he needed to do and how he needed to spend the next three days. It seems like Jesus did not have any regrets. How do you determine what you are supposed to do next? As I have listened to many of the athletes competing in the Olympics I have heard stories of their passion and singular focus to be the best in their sport. I cannot image having such a clear and singular goal. Throughout life I have had short term goals, of graduating High School, graduating college, getting married etc. Looking back these goals seemed easy to achieve. More recently, it has been difficult for me to identify how I am “supposed” to spend my time. How do you discern how to spend your time?

So many of the medals have come down to fractions of a second, have you noticed how humble many athletes have been, even when they have not won. I noticed that many of those who felt they did their best were o.k. with whatever the outcome was. How does it make you feel to do your best and still fail? Have you ever had a time in your life when you knew you were doing what you were suppose to do and it did not work out how you expected? What was that situation? Did you learn anything from that journey? Take a few moments to read this description of Joannie Rochette and her family's story.

What do you think of Joannie’s story?

During this 40 day journey of Lent, one of the biggest questions I ask myself is what do I believe? Check out Fantasia’s song “I Believe” what is it saying to you? What does this have to do with your journey? (lyrics, video)

I can see it in the stars across the sky/Dreamt a hundred thousand dreams before now I finally realize/You see I’ve waited all my life for this moment to arrive/ And finally I believe

When you look out in the distance /you see it never was that far, oh no/ Heaven knows your existence/ And wants you to be everything you are

These are the two versus that really speak to me. We all have many dreams how do we know which to pursue? Is it enough to believe that dreams can happen? How do you live your daily life in order to be faithful to your journey and to your dreams?

As always I have more questions than answers. Jesus was journeying closer to Jerusalem and closer to facing Herod. He knew Herod was not the true King so he did not fear him but Jesus knew there was a number of things he had to get done and he continued to do what he had to do each day, despite what anyone else was trying to do to him, in order to fulfill his mission.

Feel free to comment and if you can join us on Skype Thursday at 7PM “bythewaycommunity” is our contact name.

Getting a new life: Is there an app for that?

2010-02-16T19:58:00.014-05:00

It was a year ago this month that Apple came out with its “there’s an app for that” iPhone commercial , showing the world the variety of needs that could be met once you own your new smart phone. Since then the ad has been imitated and parodied into the ground, and some have considered it a hobby to collect examples of the many life situations for which there is the perfect app.

For example, there’s an app for people who are looking for the cleanest and closest bathroom, called, “SitOrSquat”. There’s a Stress Free app which can connect you to the stress-reducing exercises of mind-body healing guru Deepak Chopra. There are apps which help you to report potholes in your city directly to people who can do something about it.

Apps at their best help smart phone owners to make the right connections so they can get to where they want/need to go. Perhaps at their worst, they lull us into the illusion that there is a quick and easy answer to soothe our every ache. Now I don’t even have app capability, since my phone is of the not-quite-so-smart variety. But I still see the phenomenon as a powerful one to get us thinking about how we get what we need.

Come with me back in time long before apps… to a first century arid wasteland, where people don’t go unless they want to be alone and they’re really good at surviving outland adventures. This is where Jesus went right after he was baptized and a bunch of people could have sworn they heard God’s voice blaring out that he was God’s own Beloved Child.

Take a look at this story, imagining what it would be like to be hearing God’s affirming Voice one moment and the voice of temptation-personified the next moment… and for the next 40 days after that (Luke 4:1-13).

Whether you think of this devil character as an actual personality or just the killer tempting voice that all people live with, it doesn’t make much difference. Jesus got away to get some perspective on the choices he had to make. Was he going to go for the easy answers that the Tempter suggested? Or was he going to use God’s apps instead?

As we wander through our lives, we’ve got tough choices, too. Every once in a while we need to step back and get some perspective. You can step off of center stage and climb up to the balcony for a change: look at who you are and why you do what you do. It can be refreshing to do that. And if you’re really honest with yourself, it can be painful, too. That’s why it’s good to go on such a journey with someone else you trust, or maybe just a bunch of people who agree to reflect together.

For about 16 centuries or so, people of faith have been annually taking on a journey they’ve called Lent, which happens during the 40 days before Easter. Many have found Lent to be a deeply spiritual time of discovery and renewal. Sometimes so-called authorities have told people they have to do certain things in Lent, and the whole thing gets messed up. Lent is not about what you should do and be. It’s what you get to do and be.

I can’t make you any easy promises, but I’m willing to bet that your Easter Day will be a whole lot more meaningful if you take some time to ponder what kind of new life needs to happen inside and around you. What might happen if you take 40 or so days to make room for God to do some spring-cleaning? Time in prayer each day, reading a book of the Bible a bit at a time, journaling, giving something up that you’re practically addicted to, volunteering at a soup kitchen or shelter… these are examples of ways people change their patterns to go on a Lenten journey.

Perhaps Lent can be for you a kind of “app” which is not handed to you on a silver platter but one that you strive to make happen. We can do this together, praying for one another, giving each other insights, walking with Jesus together along sometimes-difficult roads, knowing we are held dear as God’s Beloved as we go.

Please click on “Post a comment” below if you’re willing to share your thoughts on what Lent might be for you or anything else that comes to mind.

If you’re in the Nashua area, stop by the Crowne Plaza near exit 8 on 101A, Thursday 7pm. We’ll be digging into these themes and experiencing God’s grace together. If you’re not near Nashua but have your own discussion/prayer group you’re meeting with, please let us know here on the blog what you’re up to!

We’ll continue this journey and see together what God can do!

Peace,
Kari

(For more on Lent's possibilities, see Settling for Less by Barbara Brown Taylor. And for some cool words on the practice of "giving something up", check out this brief piece from the sarcastic lutheran )

High on Glory / Googling God by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-02-10T12:58:00.011-05:00

Glory… some hunger for it and some shy away from it. Some look for it in others and in the world around them. Some point to the sky when they’ve done something note-worthy, giving any glory that may come their way to a higher power. From Super Bowl splash to Olympic beginnings, this just might be a week to ponder glory.

This week is a glory-filled one for those New Orleans folks who love their Saints. I can't help but smile when I think of this struggling, once-glorious city, feeling a surge of self-confidence again because of their Super Bowl win. I for one sincerely hope they get an economic surge as well; it’s been a long post-Katrina haul, and they could use a break.

I’ve also enjoyed perusing through the Super Bowl commercials, which has become a sport of its own these past few years. A few companies are having their glory-moments because their commercials hit the mark perfectly. Plenty others leave us marveling at what they were trying to say and who exactly those companies think we are!

Perhaps the most acclaimed commercial was Google’s Love Story Ad, which took viewers on a seeker's journey and ended with the simple words, “Search on.” With much lower production costs than most, this emotion-stirring ad (created by Eric Schmidt) is truly a winner. The message is that Google can be a guide through life, helping people to bridge the knowledge gaps (as well as the cultural gaps) and find the sweet life they’re hoping for. You don’t need a Super Bowl ring to be glowing with glory. You can find it in the everyday moments of your Search.

Jump with me into a glorious moment in the lives of Peter, James, and John in Luke 9:28-36. These three guys have seen some wild things while hanging with this Jesus, but this is one unforgettable mountain-top trip. (I mean, we knew he had some God-power, but we didn’t expect to see him radiating light and channeling our two greatest heroes!)

Peter, of course, would like the glorious moment to last forever, not knowing that there’s a much more profound glory still to come. The light gets swallowed up in fog. They hear a voice, and there’s no doubt that it’s God speaking, telling them to keep listening. Stay tuned, guys, ‘cause this glory-story has only just begun.

And what’s that “exodus” that Jesus was chatting with Moses and Elijah about? That’s where we fit into the glory. Jesus was not about to stay in that moment of God’s glorious affirmation, as if that's all life is about. He walked forward to continue his Search to bring everyone into God’s Love Story. As we, too, join that Search for what is real and true, we can welcome Jesus’ light and power into our lives, seeing glory in the everyday, every time we bridge the gaps between God and God’s people.

I’ll end with some words of poetry to ponder:

Signs and wonders lead the dancing from the heart God frees from fear:
wings of angels greet the maiden, and God finds a dwelling here;
boldly may we lift our hands, bow the head, and voice Amen;
thus does glory shine at midnight: open hearts invite the starlight…

Cast aside all fear and hiding; hand in hand we dance the round.
God is with us, Christ, abiding, and the Spirit’s gifts abound.
Called by God to holiness, let us boldly serve and bless;
and to hearts that sigh and hunger
may our lives dance signs and wonders.

from Signs and Wonders by Susan Palo Cherwien,
Evangelical Lutheran Worship # 672

Please join in the conversation by commenting below, offering your glory-stories or any other thoughts you might have. You can also join in by the way's audio Skype conversation, Thursday, 7pm, Feb. 11. Look for the contact name: bytheway community.

May glories abound,
Kari

When do I follow? When do I lead? Do I just walk beside? By Heidi Jakoby

2010-02-03T10:23:00.000-05:00

What do the Grammy’s, the continued Haiti relief efforts, many new commercials, all have in common? They are all focusing on being in relationship. Face to face friendships, fellowships, and communities, helping one another to achieve success, to help those in need and to sell products. Is the next big trend to connect with others in person???? What a radical idea.

As I listen to my friends and read face book and twitter updates are we all talking more about our in person contacts? About wanting to get together in person? I wonder how Skype has increase the face to face contact in our world. I know I see more of my brother now with skype even though we live over an hour apart. Is this the new face to face contact?

In this story from Luke 5: 1-11 (NIV) Simon said he was not worthy to follow Jesus, but Jesus does not listen and the men follow Jesus. This story begins with a crowd wanting to learn from Jesus and then a few took on the challenge of following Jesus and learning from him. What were their qualifications? What were their skills? What was their training? They did not know at the time but their time with Jesus would be short and then they would need to lead. Why did they follow?

When is it time to follow and when is it time to lead? Many leadership resources talk about the importance of creating relationships and knowing when to lead and when to follow. As the former Director of Leadership Development at Rivier College one of the things I tried to instill in all students was in order to succeed you need other people. People who can help you achieve your goals and people whose goals you can help them achieve.

As I think about Jesus leadership style I believe he focused on getting to know people, knowing his audience and then responding to their needs and at times accompanying them on their journey. This brings me to my wedding invitation and one of my favorite quotes:

Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow.

Don't walk behind me, I may not lead.

Just walk beside me and be my friend.-- Albert Camus

What does this mean for you? For me it means all relationships are a give and take. Each person is given an opportunity to lead and to follow. A lot has been written about being a good leader but what makes a good follower? What makes a good partner? Is it trust, faith, compliance, conflict avoidance? What do you think?

I know for me to follow I need to trust the person I am following, I need to know that they respect me and that they want to hear my honest opinion. Most importantly for me I need to know they sincerely care about me and my life, my success. This week President Obama was in Nashua, NH having a town meeting. The town meeting format seems to be a new trend in politics. Why is the town meeting format so popular? I think it is because there is in person contact with the people. This is one way for political leaders to come face to face with the voters and allow the voters to ask questions. This is a different level of relationship and a different way of leading.

This Sunday after the Super Bowl a new show is premiering called Undercover Boss: “Each week a different executive will leave the comfort of their corner office for an undercover mission to examine the inner workings of their company. While working alongside their employees, they will see the effects their decisions have on others, where the problems lie within their organization and get an up-close look at both the good and the bad while discovering the unsung heroes who make their company run.” (for more information) .

Why would an Executive want to do this? As a leader it is important to know what the people who are following you are experiencing. Would you do this if you were an executive?

Finally I invite you to listen to a song by the Grammy award nominated group Leeland, the song is called Follow You enjoy and let me know what you think. (lyrics, listen)

Please share your thoughts and comments.

If you are in the Nashua, NH area Thursday Feb 4th join us at Panera Bread on Amherst Street at 7 for some relationship building and conversation.

Hook-ups; What's Love Got to Do with It? by Heidi Jakoby

2010-01-27T12:33:00.000-05:00

“God is love”, “love is a second hand emotion”, “love is temporary madness”. "Love is patient and kind”. O.k. I am confused. Where does love fit into the world today? Where does God fit? How do “hook-ups” and love fit together? Yesterday I was watching the Dr. Oz show and he was talking with Mom’s and their teenage daughters. The question was asked "why are so many teens having anal sex?" One of the teens said, “now relationships start with “hook ups” the physical first so teens get bored and then try anal sex.” What has happened to love in relationships? (Dr. Oz Show video)

It is interesting to think that there are people who are trying to connect physically with another person before connecting emotionally or even before loving the other person. Why is loving someone so difficult? Is it too difficult to get to know someone and to create a relationship, a friendship before moving on to the physical? I just wonder which will endure.

Some friendships endure for a lifetime and others come and go, but how do we love one another and how do we spread love if we avoid experiencing it, because it can hurt and your “heart can be broken”. In 1Corinthians 13:1-13 1Corinthians 13:1-13 (the Message) it states:

I'm bankrupt without love.
Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.

There are so many phrases here that are about putting others before ourselves, the sense that love is selfless. As I read this I see that love is always cheering you on, cares for you more than anyone else. Love is humble, and puts others first, love is calm and forgiving. What do you think love is? How would you describe love?

Is there comfort in the quote, “God is Love”? Can you image a love like what is described in 1Corinthians 13:1-13?

What do you think of the statement “ love is it a secondary emotion”? Then what is the primary emotion?

I hope you take time to listen to these two songs and read the quote below:

God is Love by Lenny Kravitz (listen, lyrics)

What’s Love Got to Do with It by Tina Turner (listen, lyrics)

"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two." From the movie Captain Corelli’s Mandolin

Don’t forget to join us on Skype Thursday at 7pm Jan 28th our contact name is “bythewaycommunity”. If you cannot join us please leave your comments here.

be refreshed, be free . . . by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-01-18T17:41:00.011-05:00

Getting un-stuck can be such a pain. Sometimes you just can’t find the right words to express yourself. Or you can’t get your feet out of bed to get the day started. Sometimes it seems like your whole life is frozen. Like you wish you had a giant “Refresh” icon to click, to get a brand new try at making connections.

Being refreshed… sounds so good. Just give me a bit of sunshine, an energy boost, a new sense of urgency for living. New Year’s resolutions can sometimes function that way. Sometimes companies or families or individuals write mission statements, to articulate a vision that will inspire and get things moving again.

I’ve been impressed by the “Six word Memoir” movement started by the online magazine, Smith, encouraging you to tell your story in 6 words. (See Smith's 6 word challenge ). Now that’s not necessarily like finding your reason for being, but it does get you thinking about what’s going on at your very core. Here's one that was recently posted on Smith’s site:
“Born weak. Reborn strong. Thank God”. Sounds refreshing alright!

I keep playing with my six word memoir, but it usually comes out something like this: “God's bridge-building, to me, through me”. Those six words tell the story of how I'm living fully when I'm attempting to build bridges: between different people or different ways of thinking, for example. And in the middle of that bridge-building is where I find God, or probably, where God finds me.

Martin Luther King Jr. Day seems like a great day to get unstuck, to come up with a driving principle, a reason for being… since we’re celebrating the life of one who had such passion for changing his world and knew the words to say to refresh those who were oppressed.

I’ve been musing on what might be Dr. King’s six words. “Fighting non-violently for God’s freedom dream” is one that I’ve come up with.

The Savior that Dr. King believed in had a freedom dream, too. Take a look at this story from when Jesus was just jumping out of the starting blocks. He’d been baptized. He'd been tempted to ditch the whole mission. But now he was ready. He unleashed his refreshing energy on the stuck people of his hometown. Check out the story: Luke 4:14-21

What might Jesus’ six word memoir be, based on this grand opening story? How about: “God’s freedom for those squashed down”. Notice he didn’t just announce that the refreshing freedom was coming soon. He said it’s here. In my words, in my actions, in the person I am. God is here. For you. Now.

That’s what I’m hearing when I read that passage. In this very moment, when I’m trying to write a blog that might somehow bridge someone closer to God, I have God’s freeing power. Though I started off this post totally stuck (could you tell?) and at a loss for words, God’s energy began to flow when I admitted my stuckness and accepted God’s freeing lead.

Like Jesus, Dr. King preached that the freedom his people sought was theirs already. God in Jesus had already given them all the dignity they needed. They need not earn it or grab it or borrow it from those in power. They would wear their full God-given freedom for all to see, and fight for the rights that should come to all free people.

God’s freedom is ours. As we live into it, and share it with others, we can find refreshing energy and God’s own power.

Please feel free to leave your own thoughts or 6 word memoirs or hopes for refreshment. And for those who live around Nashua NH, we’ll be gathering at the Crowne Plaza, Thursday, 7pm, to get into these themes in community. All are welcome!

Peace and Freedom,
Kari

P.S. Here are a few more links to check out:
Shed a Little Light (James Taylor’s inspiring song about Dr. King)
NPR slideshow (A gallery of artists' renditions of 6 word memoirs)
MLK Song (a creative mix of Dr. King’s voice and message with music and moving scenes from the 60’s; this was just posted early today and already has been seen by 4000 people. Not everyone's going to like it, but it does get you thinking.)

New Expedition/ New Year by Heidi Jakoby

2010-01-12T22:14:00.004-05:00

    “The founder [of the National Outdoor Leadership School NOLS] Paul Petzoldt, believed one thing determined the success of an expedition more than anything else: expedition behavior.
   EB means being prepared, on time, organized, flexible and humble; seeing the humor in everything; exercising a tolerance for adversity, uncertainty and discomfort; and putting the needs of the group and others on the same level or above one’s own needs. It’s a tall order but while on expedition it has magical results.
     Petzoldt said it’s not the challenge of the environment that defeats expeditions but the quality of the interaction among the participants. This is borne out in research and experience. Successful courses at NOLS are committed to expedition behavior."
~ from the January 2010 issue of The Lutheran in an article entitled: "Packing for Your Faith Expedition" by Jeffrey D. Louden.

As the new year begins so continues our life journeys. How we approach our journey and/or our expedition can help us to grow, learn, move forward or on the other hand stall, or be stagnant. It is our choice how we want to prepare or what principles we want to use to help guide us.

In the reading from 1Corinthians 12:1-11 we are told that we all have gifts to share. Each gift is different but important. As I begin my New Expedition for 2010 I know I will travel this year with a variety of people with a variety of gifts. I know that if all those I am travelling with freely share their gifts and abide by expedition behaviors 2010 will be a magical expedition.

Sharing one's gifts freely and openly is a choice, one that is often uncomfortable and unpredictable. First you need to identify your gifts and secondly you need to use them and that is not always easy. Even if you know what gifts you have been given -- whether wise counsel; healing the sick; simple trust or clear understanding -- any of these can be difficult to share. All gifts are meant to be shared from a place of love. Out of love sharing becomes easier.

I discovered a famous poet songwriter Leonard Cohen in his song The Land of Plenty speaks to this idea of journey, love and gifts.

What do you think of the lyrics? How is your New Expedition going so far?

The Land Of Plenty

Don’t really have the courage
To stand where I must stand.
Don’t really have the temperament
To lend a helping hand.

Don’t really know who sent me
To raise my voice and say:
May the lights in The Land of Plenty
Shine on the truth some day.

I don’t know why I come here,
Knowing as I do,
What you really think of me,
What I really think of you.
For the millions in a prison,
That wealth has set apart –
For the Christ who has not risen,
From the caverns of the heart –
For the innermost decision,
That we cannot but obey -
For what’s left of our religion,
I lift my voice and pray:
May the lights in The Land of Plenty
Shine on the truth some day.

I know I said I’d meet you,
I’d meet you at the store,
But I can’t buy it, baby.
I can’t buy it anymore.

And I don’t really know who sent me,
To raise my voice and say:
May the lights in The Land of Plenty
Shine on the truth some day.

For the innermost decision
That we cannot but obey
For what’s left of our religion
I lift my voice and pray:
May the lights in The Land of Plenty
Shine on the truth some day.

As I continue on my expedition this year the EB that I most want to remember is seeing the humor in everything. I think laughter can help everyone get through anything and I am hoping for more laughter on my expedition. Which EB do you want to strive to embrace this year? What are your hopes for this year? How are you going to discover your gifts and share them?

I hope you will join us on Thursday night on our Skype call just contact "bythewaycommunity" and join us live at 7pm January 14th. Or if you can't join us Thursday leave a comment.

Epiphany: a journey.. by Heidi Jakoby

2010-01-09T23:33:00.002-05:00

Growing up I have always heard the word epiphany used and I think the best definition I have found comes from the book Stories Behind the Great Traditions of Christmas by Ace Collins

Epiphany is defined as “an intuitive grasp of reality usually through something simple and striking, an illuminating discovery, a revealing scene or moment.” What could be more simple and illuminating but a star that shined both day and night?

Epiphanies, moments of clarity or Ah-ha moments come in all shapes, sizes and timings. I think some of the most meaningful epiphanies are those little ones that just sneak up on you. They happen when you are just going about your business for the day. What have been some of your Epiphanies?

I really liked the final comment Helen made that: “God is there to help direct us at all turns in the roadways of our lives. We are not alone. That in itself is perhaps the greatest Epiphany!”

God’s presence is a source of comfort for me. Have you notice where God has shown up in your life? Where have you seen God today? Are these God moments epiphanies?

An interesting part of having an Epiphany even though you many have a new fresh understanding it does not mean a change will happen. One needs to choose to change. An epiphany in and of itself only indicates new understanding and may or may not cause a person to change or be changed. In some ways this is like the tradition of making New Year’s Resolutions. You can make a resolution but nothing is going to change unless you take action.

One of my favorite parts of the Epiphany story is the journey of the Magi, their journey to Jesus led by a star. I often wonder what their journey was like. In the passage form Matthew2:11-12 we learn that the Magi gave gifts to Jesus and that their journey took an unexpected turn. Instead of heading home the way they came they needed to find another route. What new challenges and or discoveries did they have by not going home the way they had intended? What have you learned by taking a journey that was unexpected, what epiphanies did you have because you took an unexpected turn?

Please feel free to share your thoughts and comments, and join us sometime in person or by Skype. I hope your Epiphany journey is filled with illuminating discoveries.

Star-gazing, God-spotting... by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2010-01-06T13:32:00.014-05:00

The question January poses for me is: What is there to look forward to after “the holidays” are over? What can brighten our dreary existences now? Valentines’ Day just doesn’t cut it. And Spring doesn’t seem to be making any headway yet.

I myself am quite fond of making a big deal out of the season called Epiphany, which just happens to be starting today. January 6 is a day to remember when some ancient astronomers just had to see what God was up to, given the spectacularly bright star that was making its way across the night sky. They found God’s bright idea named Jesus, and it all came together for them.

So Epiphany is the season to follow those star-gazers’ example and open our eyes to other things God might be up to. Whether we are gazing up into a gorgeous night sky or just staring at the same old computer screen… What epiphanies might be waiting for us? What clarifying insight is going to grab me?

Whenever I'm contemplating epiphanies and revelations, I can't help but think of my favorite scene in Steven Spielberg's movie, Hook. Captain Hook says to his sidekick, Smee, that he’s had an epiphany (“epiphy-what?” answers Smee), a suddenly clear understanding that his life is over, so he might as well end it. Then minutes later, Smee, who has just interrupted Hook’s suicide attempt (at Hook’s comical insistence), has the true epiphany in the scene (“I’ve just had an apostrophe!” he says, “Lightning has just struck my brain!”). Smee brings hope back into Hook’s world with his brilliant plan to defeat Peter Pan: They will defeat Peter Pan by getting Peter’s own children to love Captain Hook. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPP56_I4IB4)

Even though the two of them are up to no good, they do demonstrate the truth that light sometimes dawns when you are least expecting it. Even when you’re sure your life is over. And yes, it can happen when two less-than-stellar scoundrels put their heads together. How much more can come from truth-searching people putting their heads, hearts, and souls together? That’s pretty much what by the way is up to: giving all of us an online place where we can think and feel and pray together about what moves us and gives us meaning and direction… a place where God shows up.. where people who may have very different ideas of who God is can exchange those ideas and grow together.

Though the Epiphany season starts with the revelation of God showing up in the child Jesus, who welcomes guests from the ends of the earth, the rest of the stories get us into Jesus’ grown-up life as a teacher, healer, liberator. It all begins the day he’s dunked in river waters, baptized along with tons of others. Take a look at the story the way Luke tells it: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke%203:15-22&version=MSG
Notice how the crowds are excited but confused: Is this John the One? John’s crystal clear: Nope, not me. I’m just the water-guy; you’re looking for the fire-guy, the one who’ll “ignite the kingdom life, a fire, the Holy Spirit within you, changing you from the inside out”.

And Jesus is right there in the middle of them, not looking much like the fiery blaster that John was describing. But the epiphany is still coming; God’s presence in Jesus becomes clear, as those who’ve been baptized along with Jesus see an amazing vision. The sky opens, a dove swoops down, a voice speaks. No fire yet, but that will be coming later. Jesus’ timing is different than John expected. Jesus doesn’t clean house by force; he draws people into God’s life by the power of his all-giving love.

What epiphanies have you experienced?
What ways has God shown up for you, if at all?
What clarifying visions are you hoping for?
If you’ve been baptized, how does this story of Jesus’ baptism affect you? How about if you haven’t?

Please feel free to enter the conversation in whatever way fits you. If you happen to be near Nashua, come by Applebees on Amherst St./101A, Thursday Dec. 7th at 7pm, to chat about all this.

Epiphany-watching with you,
Kari

Christmas continues for 6 more days by Heidi Jakoby

2009-12-30T13:55:00.001-05:00

It is the 6th day of Christmas and Christmas carols are no longer heard on the radio and everyone seems to be looking straight at the New Year and they are done with Christmas, but Christmas day was just the beginning of the 12 days of christmas which end on January 6th with the celebration of Epiphany and the arrival of the Magi. I personally love this Christmas season knowing that we continue to celebrate the birth of Jesus. I found an interesting site that shares some thoughts about the urban legend or truth about the song
"The twelve days of Christmas". As this story points out the Christian meaning behind the song seems to be a myth but I enjoy linking the Christian meaning to the song, because it reminds me that I need to continue to practice kindness and love, even after Christmas and Epiphany. Is there anything wrong with linking new meanings to old songs? We often link meanings to songs, or at least memories to music. Music is very powerful and I try to continue listening to Christmas music up through January 6th but it isn't easy.

I have a difficult time staying focused on the "meaning of the season", but this reading from Colossians3:12-17 reminds me that love is the reason for the season. How can I continue to clothe myself in kindness when so many things in the news and around the world remind me that many people are not kind or caring? How do we rise above the external conflicts to focus on compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, and discipline? It has taken me a long time to embrace the peace and power of being even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense and I know I am not perfect but if I continue to aspire to it each time I do it, it comes quicker and easier.

Did you hear the report about the Grocery store that was left open by accident and the people who came in and took items and then left the money for them at the register? These are people who practice kindness, discipline, and caring. What would you have done given the opportunity they had? You can read the story and reactions for yourself. I thought it was a great reminder of the many honest people in our world.(Safeways left unlocked)

I know this Christmas season was one filled with planning and accepting what was not planned. I have been working hard at staying centered on kindness but often it is my family who challenges my kindness and forgiveness the most. I do find that some members of my family and some of my friends seem to enjoy stirring up tension, and I am not quite sure why? Sometimes I am the one pushing the buttons of my family members. This year I have tried to be more conscious of old habits and became aware of some of the buttons I push and tried to stop myself. Awareness and changing behavior is hard work, and takes practice as does, being kind and forgiving quickly. Practice and reminders of the meaning of Christmas can help.

I hope you continue to think about the meaning of Christmas through out these next 6 days and practice putting on the clothes God has provided for you throughout the new year. Have a joyous Christmas and a Happy New Year.

God’s healing shines in the darkness... by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2009-12-18T17:20:00.001-05:00

That smile on the outside's fading fast
Like the things that you thought for sure would last
But they didn't...

These words from Chicago’s 2006 song, “Feel,” struck a chord for those of us who were gathered at our “Service of the Longest Night” Thursday. It felt good to be in a supportive group that could be honest about how much it hurts when we lose what we never thought we would. Honesty is the beginning of the journey toward healing.

Our three reflections led us to begin by being honest with ourselves, then being honest with God, then finally taking Jesus seriously when he says we can let go of the heavy stuff weighing us down… and pick up a pack that will give us new meaning and purpose. So enter in, if you like, and see where these reflections and prayer-words take you: http://breadforyourjourney.blogspot.com/2009/12/reflections-and-prayers-service-of.html

What got your attention in those readings? Did anything get you thinking about your journey of healing, and where it can begin? Please feel free to put your thoughts into words by clicking on “comment” at the bottom of this post. Perhaps by the way can be a supportive community for you by “listening” to what’s going on with you this holiday season.

Those gathered at the Crowne last night had a rich discussion about how a song like Chicago’s Feel can give us permission to move out of numbness and just feel what we need to feel. And the Psalm 42 paraphrase got us into how we deal with God. What good things can happen when we just pour out to God all we are going through, even if it means spewing rage and doubt and neediness! And then when we’ve cried ourselves out, we can let God’s caring presence hold us and sing us through the night… that we might wake up with a new song and a new God-given energy.

The third reading actually inspired a burst of group laughter when one person pointed out that this version made it sound like Jesus was giving us an info-mercial! Here’s a more traditional version, if you like: http://bible.oremus.org/?ql=128145967

After our discussion we had some time to roam around the room and experience God’s grace in a variety of ways: reading, chatting, making a remembrance chain, receiving healing oil… but by far the most memorable was partaking of the most gorgeous and delicious loaf of challah bread we’d ever seen (thank you, amazing baker Matthew!). And thank you, Jesus, our savior and friend, for being our bread, for feeding us with all you are.

We ended in a circle of candlelight, hearing some words from gospel-writer John about God’s light shining in our darkness, and singing Silent Night.

May you have some heavenly peace in your sleeping and your waking, as you navigate these last days before Christmas and beyond. May the light of Christ find its way into your soul and back out through you as you care for those around you.

Peace,
Kari

PS: I recommend the book A Decembered Grief by Harold Ivan Smith, if you or someone you love could use an inspiring and filled-with-practical-ideas resource for getting through sad holidays.

Go ahead and feel… by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2009-12-15T14:52:00.007-05:00

Supporting people who are grieving and going through painful transitions has been at the heart of what by the way has been about, since our beginning days some 3 years ago. In many and various ways, we’ve tried to be a community living this message: God walks with you through good times and awful times, and we’ll all walk together to make this good news real.

By the way will again be holding our “Service of the Longest Night,” a time of reflection and prayer, acknowledging that the pre-Christmas season is not merry for everyone. For those who live anywhere near the Nashua NH area, this can be an in-person experience (Thurs. 7pm at the Crowne Plaza, at exit 8). For others, this can be a virtual experience of community, beginning here with this blog post, and continuing on through the week. Feel free to leave your comment, whether you’re one in need of support or one willing to offer it to others.

If you’ve been to this blog before, you may have noticed our community is formed as we dive into a piece of God’s word and see how it intersects with our lives and with the world around us. This week we’ll start with Psalm 42, which you can find at this link: http://bible.oremus.org/?ql=127903163

This psalm starts with being honest about a painful need, a need for understanding and company, a need for God. The honesty takes this hurting poet on a journey… of memories, soul-searching longing, and eventually: hope.

I tried a little creative project of my own, re-writing this psalm for those searching for relief from loss during this holiday time. My hope is that it would get you thinking about what you’d like to ask of God… and of God’s messengers, like the btw community you find here.

So here’s my attempt at a re-write:

Pre-Christmas Grief a la Psalm 42
As a deer leans forward, aching for water,
     so am I thirsty for you, O God.
I so need to know that you haven’t dumped me.
     I have to somehow see your face.
I’ve sobbed myself dry; still relief eludes me.
     I ponder good times, but they feel far away.
Christmas songs in the air
     leave me breathless with loss.
Deeper I sink, ‘til there’s just nothing left,
     nothing but you, God, nothing but you.
I grope in the darkness, some presence is there.
     I remember you once were a rock in my storms.
I’ll give trust a try; I’ll peek out of this hole,
But you, God — oh please, God —
     must make a move, too.
Hum your tune as I sleep,
     so I’ll wake warmed with song.
Let me feel my wounds healing,
     and I’ll know you have come.
Confident once more,
     I’ll have hope for tomorrow,
My whole life a prayer, to the God of my soul.

I’d love to see your re-write, too, if you feel so inclined. Just click on comment below.

For more exploring, here are some links to a Chicago song that’s always a good listen for me when I need permission to go ahead and feel.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JJn7azWR2i8
http://www.oldielyrics.com/lyrics/chicago/feel.html

Let's all be watching out for those who are hurting, those who've lost jobs and homes, those who are missing loved ones who have died. Watching and praying...

God, we come to you during this Christmas season, many of us with pain growing inside us. As the nights have been growing longer, so has the darkness wrapped itself around our hearts. We need to know you are here… that you are here for us. Be our rock in the storm, God. Bring us safely home. In your name we pray... amen.

God’s peace,
Kari

Taking Time to Pause by Heidi Jakoby

2009-12-14T11:57:00.000-05:00

Obviously I decided to take some time to pause after my last blog I realized that I needed to take some of my own advise and have a simple weekend, after all this is my birthday month. Anyway to get back to the reflections posted on our Bread for Your Journey blog. Besides the passage from Luke and the poem, All I really need to know I learned in Kindergarten, I added a song by Van Morrison Keep it Simple. On Thursday we had a Skype conversation about these reflections and here are some of our insights. It would be great to hear what you think.

In case you have not heard the 2009 most fascinating person according to Barbara Walters is Michelle Obama. After watching the Barbara Walter’s special it was interesting to see some seemingly outrageous individuals seem very down to earth and at least two women on the list because of what their husbands did.

O.k. let’s get back to John the Baptizer, one of the most fascinating people in the Bible (just my opinion). His boldness in telling the people what they need to do is admirable; he was able to know that his purpose was to prepare the way for Jesus. He instructed the people simply and they continued to come. Was being baptized by John just the popular thing to do at the time or did those being baptized fully understand what was happening and who was coming? Does it matter? What have you done lately just because it was the popular thing?

How does our culture of consumerism play into this idea of “doing the popular thing”? We are bombarded with advertising and marketing telling us what to buy, what we need and what to do, how do we begin to see through all of this and spend time exploring faith? In the second reflection All I really need to know I learned in Kindergarten one of the lines is “Share everything”. This line flies in the face of consumerism. This is saying that everything we have we should share. During this holiday season I often catch myself questioning what I want versus what I need. This weekend I decided it was more important to be present with my husband and sleep in late on Sat, and then spend the day with friends doing some wine tasting and conversing. It was a simple day but very refreshing. So what did I accomplish on Sat? Some would say nothing but others would say I shared, played, and laughed with friends, and sometimes that is the best way to spend one’s day. Dustin who was on the Skype conversation Thursday mentioned one of his favorite quotes from Into the Wild was “the most important part of life is to share it.” Taking time to share your life with others can be rewarding in ways we cannot predict.

If you look at the song by Van Morrison you will see his response to his life and how society mocked his work, how he was misunderstood and in some ways how we (society) may not have been supportive of his bold vision. There is much in this song and it makes me curious about Van Morrison’s life and art. Sometimes when our lives get out of control the only thing we can do is to try and break it down into simple pieces.

I hope you take the time to slow down, pause and to appreciate some of the simple things in life and share your life with others. What do you think; please comment?

Simple Lessons during this busy time. by Heidi Jakoby

2009-12-08T17:29:00.000-05:00

As the year comes to an end I am beginning to see everyone’s top ten lists and tomorrow Barbara Walters special the 10 most fascinating people of 2009 airs and many are wondering who will top that list See 9 of the 10 most facinating poeple . Well if I had to put together a list of my favorite 10 characters in the Bible John would definitely be on that list. Maybe I will work on that for a New Year’s blog?

Anyway, I will be curious to see what the values and experiences make someone fascinating? In this Bible reading Luke3:7-18 John is fascinating, he is unconventional but he is giving the people a rather simple message. He tells them to “Share with one another, Be Kind to one another. Don’t fight. Be fair. Don’t hoard, or lord it over one another.” Hum, some of the most popular movies, TV shows, especially reality television, are making money on the fact that we do not want to see anyone doing any of these. There is more meanness, fighting, injustice, hoarding and lording on television today than I can ever recall. Does this all make for good television and great movies? I know there are exceptions but I think they can be hard to find. What are you watching? What is entertaining to you?

As I read a number of blogs and commentaries I kept thinking about the poem by Robert Fulghum, All I really need to know I learned in Kindergarten. I could comment on every line, “Share everything.” During this holiday season this is one we could all be better at. I find myself thinking about how much I have and am aware of so many in need. Today I was heading to the grocery store and I was hungry, and in that moment I actually tried to think about being hungry for more than a moment. I was hungry not because I did not have food but because I did not feel like eating what I had. In some ways I had an abundance of food to choose from and definitely once I got to the market I had an over abundance to choose from. What do you have an abundance of that you can share? Many of our Food Pantries are low on food, consider sharing what you have. Another line is, “Play fair.” I have great respect for people who play fair, unfortunately in life many things do not seem fair and what I think is fair others may not. What have you noticed about playing fair recently? Having two older brothers growing up I thought they never played fair. Now as an aunt to a number of children I find myself wanting to teach them the rules of the game and to encourage them to play as the game was intended. Unfortunately I am finding that not all parents think playing by the rules is a good idea, what have you noticed?

This poem influenced my life greatly it taught me that many complicated things come down to a few simple values, acts of kindness and sharing. That if we could be more patients and loving everything would seem a little better. Is this too optimistic, too simplistic? What do you think?

Join in on our live Skype conversation on Thursday at 7PM and share your thoughts, or comment here. So put bythewaycommunity on your Skype contact list and join us.

What gives you JOY? by Heidi Jakoby

2009-12-04T17:59:00.001-05:00

Some of my favorite face book or twitter posts are those acknowledgements of unexpected joyful moments. Those moments of joy when you find your keys that were lost, or when a young child spins in circles laughs and makes himself dizzy for the first time are moments of joy. One friend posted some of the most beautiful pictures from the ice storm last year and there was such joy in the sky and sun reflecting in the ice and snow.

Last night my husband and I discussed the readings I posted earlier this week and a beautiful advent prayer a friend posted. ( Luke1: 68-79 and Philippians1:3-11)

It was fascinating to talk about what brings us joy and to find out that for both of us it is very simple things not the things the media puts out but the things that touch our hearts. He said that the quiet that comes with snow brings him joy. As I thought about it there is a different silence when you wake up to a neighborhood covered in snow. For me it is watching people enjoy my cooking or watching someone un-expectantly smile/laugh when they least expect it and no matter how hard they try to stop they can’t.

So how can we choose our joy? Maybe it is more about trying to be present in each moment of this time of Advent. To allow yourself to be distracted by what is most important and to not spend all of your time caught up in the frenzy of the season. In order to avoid some of the craziness of this holiday season I have discovered some great times to shop and I try and get together with friends more than worry about what will be happening in a few weeks. Take a breath realize what is truly the meaning of the season. Take some time and read these two passages from the Bible again.

Take care not to sit in the darkness, take time to find joy this season. What are the bright spots in this season? How might you create some joy in another person’s life? I know that during this time of year when my friends are struggling I just want to help, but that takes time and effort. What would make a friend who is struggling happy today? Sometimes it is a simple phone call, e-mail and sometimes a wall post.

I hope you remember that you are special and loved. You are important to the world and as you begin each day during this time of waiting, expect joy each day, expect good things to happen and help spread kindness. I know that sometimes I forget that I am special and that I can expect good things to happen each day. I hope each day of Advent brings you a little closer to God.

A friend shared this Advent prayer written by Henri Nouwen:

Lord Jesus, Master of both the light and the darkness, send your Holy Spirit upon our preparations for Christmas.
We who have so much to do seek quiet spaces to hear your voice each day.
We who are anxious over many things look forward to your coming among us.
We who are blessed in so many ways long for the complete joy of your kingdom.
We whose hearts are heavy seek the joy or your presence.
We are your people, walking in darkness, yet seeking the light. To you we say, “Come Lord Jesus!”

Amen

Prepare the way, one step at a time. by Heidi Jakoby

2009-12-01T21:17:00.000-05:00

Didn’t we just get done preparing for the holiday of Thanksgiving? What are we preparing for now? The next set of holidays. Whether it is Chanukah, kwanza or Christmas you are preparing to celebrate. A celebration is to be joyful, so what is with all the stress? Why don’t we enjoy the days leading up to the next holiday. For me Christmas is a time to celebrate and December is also my birthday month so I like to enjoy December. For many December is a difficult time, of trying to fit everything in, achieving our own expectations, sometimes unrealistic ones?

I recently read an article called “Make room for joy!” by Cricket Cooper in the New Hampshire Episcopal News where she talks about choosing joy. Say no to some things so you can experience joy this holiday season. Find a balance in your preparation and your joyous waiting. What do you think how does one strike this balance?

Today is also World Aids Day twitter has gone red and Alisha Keys is having a special concert tonight which you can see online on YouTube live. You can actually donate to her foundation to help Hiv victims in Africa Keep A Child Alive A very big part of this season is giving, giving gifts, giving back, and offering gratitude. I have been trying to balance the media blitz of Christmas things with the expectant waiting of this Advent season. The waiting for a child, a child that will bring hope to the world, is what some of us are waiting for, and then on Dec. 25th the 12 days of Christmas begin. It is amazing to me that the real Christmas season begins with Christmas Day yet all around us the retailers and media started Christmas before Thanksgiving.

In the lesson from Luke Luke 1: 68-78 we hear about the birth of John the Baptizer who will be the one to prepare the way for Jesus. How have you prepared the way for Jesus and God in your life? Have you considered inviting Jesus and God into your life? Have you asked god to leave and go away?

This is often called the “Season of Joy” and the lesson from Philippians Philippians1:3-11 talks about joy, how are you making sure you are finding joy this month? How do you find joy each day?

These are some of my thoughts and I look forward to meeting a few of you at Applebee’s Thursday at 7pm in North Nashua on 101A. After this conversation there will be another post with some more reflections and thoughts. I hope this has caused you to pause and take a minute to think about what you want this time to be for you.

Is it ever too late to say thank you? by Heidi Jakoby

2009-11-26T11:51:00.001-05:00

On this day of thanksgiving I am taken with the importance of living in a world with others. I have recently noticed how some of my friends and family have a very small view of the world. They barely think beyond the moment or beyond their immediate family. I know that when you are going through difficult times sometimes it is best to think about what you need to do in the next hour rather than the next five years. I am reflecting on people who have stability and many things to be thankful this day.

As in the first reading(to see the reflections and readings for this week you can link to Bread for your journey) about the story of putting 5 grains of corn on each empty plate and having each person share the things they are thankful for this day, I am sure for many those things go beyond themselves and to the world. What are you thankful for locally, nationally and globally? I try hard not to get too caught up in my own little world but try to think of others, help out where I can and be thoughtfully thankful. In the last reflection we are called to be thankful, and to spread God’s love.

Earlier this week the local TV station in Nashua, NH was interviewing people online for a turkey and food at the Nashua Soup Kitchen see story at: Nashua Soup Kitchen What struck me about this report was how each person online was helping one another and they are were thankful. Even though for a number of people this was their first time in line they were thankful and figuring out how to get through these difficult times. One particular person even re-gifted some of his food to a larger family to help out. The circle of giving and gratitude was wonderful. I also find great comfort in knowing there are places people can go for help and places I can give to out of my thankfulness for the blessings in my life.

If you are feeling truly blessed and thankful this day I challenge you to consider how you can share that with others? A sign I past recently said, “Give as much as you can and be thankful for what you can give.” What are you giving away today?

I need your help I am looking for your thoughts on the following thankful dilemma.

When I grew up my parents taught me to send thank you cards for gifts received and I have noticed how thank yous are fewer and farther between these days. I try and write out thank you to people or at least acknowledge their thoughtfulness but it isn’t always easy. I recently found a stack of thank you cards I wrote out over two years ago that I thought were mailed and they were not. Is it too late to send them? Is it ever too late to be thankful and express your gratitude? What do you think?

Don’t forget to play, relax and enjoy the day!

Closure and beginnings... by Heidi Jakoby

2009-11-21T16:35:00.001-05:00

It is interesting with how busy we are in life we often do not take time to close things, whether it is a draw, cabinet or a relationship or job. What is it about closure that many of us don’t; want to do it or think about it? I believe it is about time and feelings of loss. It takes time and thought to put closure on something. It takes time to honor what has occurred and to value what has happened. That brings us to the first reading from “Reverence: the Practice of Paying Attention” by Barbara Brown Taylor. You can see the readings, reflections and prayers at http://breadforyourjourney.blogspot.com/ .In the first reading there is a quote “The practice of paying attention does take time.” Paying attention to others, to yourself, to the world around you takes time. Do you notice what is around you? Do you appreciate those around you? Do you take the time to honor the many moments in your life? The idea of reverence that is spoken about in this first reading causes me to think about the many things and people I take for granted the things I do not take time to be thankful for or to offer reverence.

On Friday Oprah announced that she would end her show after next season, more and more television shows announce their ending at the beginning of their last season so they and their fans can have closure. Why is closure important? I think it helps us to move on to the next thing with less regrets and more joy especially if things end well.

Some of the discussion last Thursday centered on losing one’s job and how that was handled by the employer. Many of us commented how our employers just wanted us gone and seemed to fear what we might do if we had time to pack up, say good bye or create some closure. How have you found closure to your jobs? Were people kind or were you escorted from the building?

The second reading from John, reminds us that Jesus came and died for us. Jesus helped the Disciples have closure through the act of a meal of bread (Jesus body) and wine (Jesus blood) a continuous ritual reminder of all that Jesus gave for us. Rituals are very powerful during joyous times and sad times. What are some of your rituals during different times of your life? What are some cultural rituals?

The last reading I really love because it brings hope and joy. Knowing that any closure in my life whether good or bad Jesus is there and that is a great comfort.

What do you think of these comments and the readings? Please share them here.

All’s well that ends well (and begins well)... by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

2009-11-16T23:49:00.006-05:00

Two people are given the news that they’ve lost their jobs. One is handed a pink slip and ushered out the door. The other is given six week's notice, an appreciative send-off party, and a good severance package. Both people have lost something important to them. But only one has a sense of closure.

A compelling book is only as good as its ending. Two in a relationship that say, “Let’s still be friends,” will have to work at it to make the transition. Closure is important. Things can just come to an end, or they can end well. And when things can end well, there’s room for healthy beginnings.

Part of ending well must be telling the truth, being honest about what’s happened, how it’s affected us, and where we intend to go from here.

Soon we’ll be coming to the end of 2009. The end of a decade. Incredible! I’m sure the world around us will be coming up with all kinds of lists: the best of this and the worst of that. And maybe we’ll even do some reflective truth-telling to find some closure… and to look forward to new beginnings.

The faith community known as by the way has travelled through its two-and-a-half years with many endings and beginnings. We’ve often used the word, “organic” to describe ourselves and our way of making transitions from one phase to the next. The old ideas and resources become the compost for the new seeds that are sprouting. We keep flowing on, shaping ourselves to the changing circumstances, according to where we see God is leading us.

This Thursday by the way will be marking an ending and a new beginning. Two things are coming to an end: 1) our pattern of weekly worship at the Crowne Plaza, and 2) our goal of becoming a congregation that’s rooted in one local scene. And what’s springing forth from this rich soil that is our past? Some new patterns and some new goals! I won’t go into the details here, but I will say that I am confident that the Spirit is leading us to make a broader impact on this world this God so loves.

So this week we’re working on some healthy closure and looking forward to what God’s going to be up to next. We’ll dig into a story from Jesus’ life that has us facing up to his time of endings, that time when he looked like he was a washed-up loser whose glory days were over. But the reality could not have been more different. The new life was only just beginning.

Take a peek into the last chapter of Jesus’ life, where we see the “powerless” Jesus on trial before “powerful” Pilate, the person who could sentence him to death, or not. If he had any sense at all, Jesus would be on his knees begging for mercy. Instead, he’s standing tall calmly trying to teach Pilate a thing or two about true power: the power to tell the truth. The power to look beyond this world’s power and see God’s kind of power at work. Read it here:
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John%2018:33-37&version=CEV

There’s so much more to say about Jesus’ radical kind of power — power FOR others instead of power OVER others — and the amazing beginnings that come for all of us who follow this strangely powerful leader. Please share any thoughts you may have on closures and new beginnings, truth-telling and empowering, by clicking on “post a comment” below. Come, if you can, to the Crowne Plaza (at exit 8 in Nashua NH) Thursday 7pm. And come back to the blog at week’s end for more.

Reaching closure for now,

Kari

Good Fences Make Good Neighbors. by Heidi Jakoby

2009-11-16T09:56:00.000-05:00

Please go to http://breadforyourjourney.blogspot.com/ to read, listen and reflect on the poem, song and gospel chosen for Nov. 12.

As we lisented to the words of Robert Frost the phase "Good Fences Make Good Neighbors" resonated for me as it was put to me in High School in the form of a question for the debate team for the year, "Do good fences make Good Neighbors?" and for the entire debate season we had to be able to argue both sides of this question. With last week being the anniversary of the Berlin wall coming down, it has been interesteing to think about that wall coming down and the walls being built in the United States between the US and Mexico and those being built between Israel and Palestine ( check out this link to learn more about Peace Not Walls, campaign for peace http://www.elca.org/Our-Faith-In-Action/Justice/Peace-Not-Walls.aspx )

Also, in the reading form Mark Jesus talks about how the temple will be desctroyed. If you look at ruins of ancient cultures we all know that nothing lasts forever. Walls and fences will not stand forever, they too will come down. As we look at our individual lives what walls do you have in your life? What are you walling in ore walling out? What walls do you need to break down in order to live your best life?

In the song from the Newsboys they talk about the secrets we keep that may be preventing us from really knowing love or truly knowing how wonderful life can be. What secrets are you not facing? What are you afraid to share with the world?

One cannot look at the reading from Mark and not reflect on the end of the world. As you may know by now on Friday the new movie 2012 came out and was #1 at the box office. Why do we enjoy these apocolyptic movies? What do they offer us? This movie is based on the belief held by some that the world will end on Dec. 21, 2012 and this was concluded from the ancient Mayan Calendar. If you knew when your life would end would you live each day differently? Would you go on a trip? Would you stop working? Would you spend more time with your family? Martin Luther when asked what he would do if the world would end tomorrow, "I would plant a tree today." When I think about Luther's statement I know that the best is yet to come and that when my life ends I will be with God so it is all good and I get great comfort from my faith. Where do you get your comfort each day?

I look foward to your comments and thoughts on these reflections.

How do you wait expectantly? by Heidi Jakoby

2009-11-11T17:08:00.000-05:00

Mark 13:1-8 (New Living Translation)

Jesus Foretells the Future

1 As Jesus was leaving the Temple that day, one of his disciples said, “Teacher, look at these magnificent buildings! Look at the impressive stones in the walls.”
2 Jesus replied, “Yes, look at these great buildings. But they will be completely demolished. Not one stone will be left on top of another!”
3 Later, Jesus sat on the Mount of Olives across the valley from the Temple. Peter, James, John, and Andrew came to him privately and asked him, 4 “Tell us, when will all this happen? What sign will show us that these things are about to be fulfilled?”
5 Jesus replied, “Don’t let anyone mislead you, 6 for many will come in my name, claiming, ‘I am the Messiah.’[a] They will deceive many. 7 And you will hear of wars and threats of wars, but don’t panic. Yes, these things must take place, but the end won’t follow immediately. 8 Nation will go to war against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be earthquakes in many parts of the world, as well as famines. But this is only the first of the birth pains, with more to come.

As I have been reflecting on this reading I think it is telling us to be ready and to live our life expectantly. As I live in the northeastern United States this is a time when all the leaves fall and there is a clear ending to Summer and the beginning of a new season. Living all my life in an area that has four seasons I am always expectant of the next season. I am not quite sure how to describe that sense of expectancy. It is thinking of those favorite activities, smells and tastes of each season.

In the beginning of this lesson Jesus talks about the temple being demolished. All of the walls will fall. John Meunier commented on his blog “I think of it [Mark 13:1-8] as a metaphor for the walls we construct in our own lives and our own psychology. When they fall, how terrible it can seem. Even when the collapse is necessary.” What walls do you have up? John's comments reminded me of Rihanna who last Friday was interviewed by Diane Sawyer on 20/20 where she outlined her abuse at the hands of Chris Brown, is she letting some of her walls down? http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1625783/20091107/rihanna.jhtml

Then this week was the 20th anniversary of the Berlin Wall coming down. As a person whose parents are German and with a Mom who had to escape from East Germany to West Germany it is still amazing to me that Germany is again one country, united. How did these walls fall? Were people on both sides expectantly waiting for that day? With walls going up between Israel and Palestine, I wonder if people on both sides are expectantly waiting for those walls to fall?

How do you wait expectantly? If you knew you only had 6 months to live what would you do differently?

These are just a few thoughts. Consider joining us for Bread for you journey on Thursday Nov 12th 7pm at the Crowne Plaza or come back to this blog and see what we talked about.

Putting your whole self in ain’t hokey

2009-11-06T11:31:00.005-05:00

by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

Have you heard about the bumper sticker that says, “What if the hokey pokey really is what it’s all about?”

That’s how last night’s Bread for Your Journey got started, just after the theme of the evening was announced: “you put your whole self in” (see this blog’s previous post for more on the theme). I can’t take credit for it. It bubbled up out of our circle of those gathered. Lying in the center of that circle was a black scarf of mourning, holding a small cruet of oil, a bit of flour, a couple of shekels, and some random-looking chains. You’ll see why in a minute…

If you’d like to enter into this time of reflection, prayer, and discussion hop over to http://www.breadforyourjourney.blogspot.com/ and then come on back to hear more.

+ + + + + + + + +

All three stories show us people who threw themselves into something, not planning to be heroes at all. But those actions were noticed. And a kind of energy exudes from the telling of their stories. Sometimes that’s exactly the energy we need to get us connected again, connected to what we are passionate about – what we’d like to put our whole selves into.

In the story from Mark’s gospel, we see Jesus pointing out two different kinds of passion. Over in this corner, we see some guys who put their whole selves into dressing well and looking good. In order to pull it off, they have to strong-arm the weakest folks, get some extra income by stomping on the poor. This kind of passion leaves people feeling like they themselves are gods. Not good for the relationship with the real God.

And in this corner… where did you say to look, Jesus?... oh! over there! There she is... the one whose putting her whole self into her gift to God. She’s passionately connected to the God she serves. And she becomes for us a beacon of light. Even though she has so little, she has what really matters: trust in the God who loves her.

Even as Jesus points at her, she’s pointing back to Jesus, in a way. And that’s what REALLY makes her a hero. Her giving of her whole self lights the path that is ahead of Jesus… as he walks into dangerous territory, putting his life on the line. Jesus puts his whole self into connecting all people to the God who loves them. And when we accept this gift of life, we are freed to give our whole selves with abandon, with joy. This passionate joy multiplies as we share it in community, the community God's spirit draws together, whether it's at the Crowne Plaza, or here on line.

And THAT’S what it’s all about.

At least that’s what I think. How about you? Please comment as the spirit moves you. Start some conversation and see where it goes…

Peace,
Kari

you put your whole self in

2009-11-04T07:48:00.001-05:00

by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

I do a lot of listening for a living. And here’s what I’m hearing: Lots of people are wandering these days, in some kind of uncharted territory. Joblessness. Cluelessness. Homelessness (physical and/or spiritual). Rug-pulled-out-from-under-me-ness. All kinds of “lands of the lost".

Sometimes wanderers look around for a hero, someone to inspire them, cheer them on. And sometimes they look into their own past, to find the hero they once were.

I’m not talking super-heroes here. Just people who know what they are passionate about, and they go or it. They put their whole selves into what they’re doing. And they make a difference.

Can you look back into your story and locate an episode where you put your whole self into what you were doing? Did you feel the aliveness that comes from being focused and determined? Or was it just the freedom to be who you are and do what you do best?

I can think of work weeks where I hammered or painted or cleaned up messes with a great group of volunteers. I gave a week of my time to do something out of my comfort zone, for someone else. It wasn’t easy, but it felt great. And I still reach back to those experiences, when God’s energy was so tangible and sure… especially during my times of wandering.

There came a time in Jesus life when he was in uncharted territory. Now I’m not saying he was wandering, because I don’t want to project or assume… but he was human, and he had some mighty tough realities to face. Like when he was in Jerusalem, not at all his home turf, and he knew that if he kept challenging the system there’d be serious consequences. He mentioned more than once that he saw death row in his future. But he didn’t let that stop him.

Take a look at this episode from Jesus’ life and see what he sees, the injustice as well as the hero he admires.
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=mark%2012:38-44&version=NCV
She gave all she had. She might as well have climbed up and put her whole body-and-soul into the offering box. Unknowing, she gave a gift of life to Jesus, even as he walked forward to put his life on the line… for her and for all of us.

There’s so much more here to talk about here. Please share your thoughts by clicking on “comments” below. Better yet, if you’re able, come to the Crowne Plaza in Nashua (at exit 8) where we’ll dig into the good stuff of this story and stories happening around us as well.

Wandering with you,

Kari

Love can bring you to your knees. by Heidi Jakoby

2009-10-30T15:20:00.000-04:00

You can link to the readings and prayers at http://breadforyourjourney.blogspot.com/

As we came together and reflected on the Eulogy Maria Shrive gave for her mother, it struck me that in the poem there is a line “your love has brought me to my knees,” both love and loss have brought Maria to her knees. How have you been stopped by your emotions or what triggered you to fall to your knees? In the case of Jesus the loss and the love Jesus had for Lazarus brought him to his knees. He was both angry and compassionate simultaneously. Jesus experienced a flood of emotions as he came into the village. So what does this have to do with us?

I thank Helen for commenting on my initial thoughts. It is very difficult to share with anyone a loss that stops you in your tracks. I cannot describe the situation that brought me to my knees. I know what caused it but it is difficult to articulate and even more difficult to share with others. My poor husband witnessed it and he was at a loss for how to help. In many ways there is no way to help in the moment other than to be present and to love a person through it. As the person brought to their knees it is important that you can hang on to a ray of hope that you will get through the next hour, the next day and so forth. Maria Shriver said at the Women’s Conference 2009 round table discussion on Grief, Healing and Resilience, “The real truth is that I am not fine.” She goes on to tell how she is working through the grief. Lisa Niemi, Patrick Swayze’s wife also spoke. Lisa said, “When the grief takes you, it’s like your body is not your own. I’m just going with the flow. I know I have to go through it.” Lisa will also appear on Oprah today, to discuss her life. Maria Shirver shared that Kelly Preston had agreed to join in the roundtable but she had called and said "it was just too painful to talk about Jett, the grief was still too debilitating for her". http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20315810,00. Everyone grieves differently and time passes differently.

Everyone who has been able to live through the grief generally references, friends and or family who accompanied them through the process of grieving and the passage of time. This week on the Biggest Loser Abby Rike was voted off, she had lost her husband and children and she used food to cope and the opportunity to be on the Biggest Loser helped her, “join life again”, check out her story http://tvwatch.people.com/2009/10/29/biggest-losers-abby-rike-i-have-rejoined-life/
.

The reason I chose the second reflection the song Soul Cakes by Sting is some of the commentary I heard from Sting. Soul cakes were put outside the house for the souls that had been lost but were really there for those in need. The people who needed food would eat the soul cakes and say a prayer for the family. It is interesting that there are many traditions around remembering the dead. I know I grew up going to the cemetery regularly to honor my grandparents, who I really did not know in life. I only recently realized that not every family had rituals around remembering those who had died. I find it comforting to reflect on what those who have died had taught me. I feel that I honor their life whenever I pass on what they have taught me. Sting talks about winter as a time of reflection you can link to this interview to hear more about his motivation behind this new cd http://edition.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Music/10/29/sting.music/.

I would encourage you to spend some time thinking about what you have gained from those you have lost. Take a few minutes and write down what you want others to learn from you and continue to give that to others. Also, what did you learn from a loss that you remember often and want to share with others?

I know that my understanding of God’s love helped me through my difficult times and I want to share that lesson with others.

May you find peace and comfort this week.

What loss has brought you to your knees? by Heidi Jakoby

2009-10-28T15:15:00.000-04:00

This week we are exploring loss and grief. What kinds of losses have you experienced in your life? Did it have a physical affect on you? How have you gotten through that grief?

As I read and reflected on the lesson for this week John11:32-44 http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John11:32-44&version=MSG this is the story of Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead. The part of this story that makes me wonder is Jesus physical reaction to the death of Lazarus. Jesus wept and he was physically disturbed by the death of Lazarus.

At the Women’s Conference 2009 http://www.californiawomen.org/ this week Maria Shriver and others spoke about their grief over the loss of a loved one and how they have been getting through each day.

I read the following in the Los Angeles Times: “Maria Shriver has long sought to protect her privacy as California's First Lady, but today she brought thousands to tears with an extraordinary evocation of her grief two months after the death of her mother, Eunice Kennedy Shriver. During a luncheon session at the Women's Conference she is chairing in Long Beach, Shriver told attendees that she stood before them "with a broken heart." She said she has told people that she is holding up well, but "the real truth is that I'm not fine.”

"The real truth is that my mother's death has brought me to my knees," she said. "I had feared this my entire life. . . . She was my hero, my role model, my very best friend. I spoke to her every single day of my life. I tried really hard when I grew up to make her proud of me." Maria Shriver has long sought to protect her privacy as California's First Lady, but today she brought thousands to tears with an extraordinary evocation of her grief two months after the death of her mother, Eunice Kennedy Shriver. (Here is the link to the entire article http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-maria-shriver28-2009oct28,0,5125731.story?track=rss )

Has grief or loss brought you to your knees? I know this has happened at least once in my life and when I think back to that day I need to not think of it for too long or else I can get lost there. Going on with grief is never easy but I know that those I have lost have taught me many things, but I still grieve.

Please comment on these thoughts and questions and consider joining us for Bread for your Journey this Thursday night at the Crowne Plaza Nashua NH 7PM. See you there.

The truth sets your soul free. by Heidi Jakoby

2009-10-27T22:53:00.000-04:00

Check out the reflections and prayers from Oct 22 at http://breadforyourjourney.blogspot.com/

Our discussion began reflecting on the statement from Anita Atina;

The duality of truth,

Fights for resolution,

and yet, coexists

Quietly, when it needs to

This sense of the duality of truth that we each in our own way have our own truth is intriguing. What is your truth and how does that differ from someone else’s? Is there only one truth? How do facts like two plus two differ from the truth? Check out the addition Don Tanner made to Anita’s Poem.

If you lie at what point does the truth come out anyway? We have all heard the expression “the truth will set you free”, free from what? Free from lies and deception but there still may be consequences. With the story of the “balloon boy” ultimately the 6 year old told the truth. This truth may put his parent in jail, how does that set him free? It frees him and his family from keeping up a lie. Being free of lies and secrets is a freedom we can choose, just as we can choose to follow Jesus, to learn about the example his life is to us.

In the Gospel of John Jesus simply asks us to believe in him and his teaching. Jesus calls us to love one another and to do our best and if you believe Jesus you will be free.

As we listened to the Eric Clapton song Tell the Truth (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XYiCxZcO5j4 )

I especially noticed the line “you better come to terms with your fellow men soon,” to me this sounded that if you do not come clean with the truth your world will be constantly unsettled. There is no foundation on which to move forward in peace and freedom.

Truth and Freedom how do you link the two in your life?

These are just a few of the thoughts expressed at bread for your journey.

Truth does it set you free? by Heidi Jakoby

2009-10-21T18:32:00.000-04:00

This last week the media has been all over the "Balloon Boy" story. I don't know about you but I was listening to the radio in my car as this now hoax was unfolding. The radio commentator was clearly upset and asked us all to say prayers for the boy and his family, so I said a prayer. The radio commentator at one point hoped that the child was not in the balloon but was hiding, as small children sometimes do when they think they will be in trouble. What happened in the days that followed this incident was absolutely disturbing to me.

The truth about the incident came out on Larry King Live and it was revealed by the 6 year old boy Falcon. It then came out that his Dad was trying to land a reality television show. What??? This is so perplexing to me. Even though he did not put his son in danger the family put rescue workers in danger delayed many flights and had upset people all over the country.

I know I felt used and I still am not sure what the complete truth is. My hope is that the rest of the story will come out. In John8:31-36 (below), Jesus is described as the truth. This is the part of the Bible where the quote “The truth will set you free” is taken.

Often when I think of this phrase I think about the quote “honesty is the best policy” and I flash back to my parents telling me to “tell the truth” especially when I did something wrong. It always felt like telling the truth was the right thing to do but facing any consequences was not very appealing. Most of the time I think I eventually told the truth after blaming my brothers did not work.

Anyway it was ultimately Falcon Heene age 6 who told the truth as he was probably taught.

How do you feel about hoaxes, are they o.k.? do you feel duped? Is it all in fun?

How do you feel about the truth? Do you always tell the truth? When do you hold back the truth?

What does it mean to you that “Jesus is the truth”?

Join us Thursday to explore what truth means to us today. We will be meeting at the Crowne Plaza Nashua, NH at 7PM.

Please feel free to comment.

John8:31-36NRSV

31 Then Jesus said to the Jews who had believed in him, ‘If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples; 32and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.’ 33They answered him, ‘We are descendants of Abraham and have never been slaves to anyone. What do you mean by saying, “You will be made free”?’

34 Jesus answered them, ‘Very truly, I tell you, everyone who commits sin is a slave to sin. 35The slave does not have a permanent place in the household; the son has a place there for ever. 36So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed.