Wednesday, September 9, 2009

oh tell me, who are you?

by Kari Henkelmann Keyl

“Tell me something about yourself,” says the interviewer, “What are your strengths and weaknesses? Who would you say you are?”

Like so many in our country these days, many of the people who make up the community that is by the way are in the process of interviewing for jobs. Or they recently have been, or soon will be. It can be a grueling business, finding a job… like placing yourself up on an auction block and trying to show your best side… over and over again. To keep it up, you almost have to have a supportive friend or two around, someone who will check in to see how you’re holding up, someone who understands what it’s like.

Who would you say you are? It’s tough to answer that. I don’t know about you, but who I am changes a lot, day by day even. I’m not the same person I was two months ago, in one way. In another way, there’s something about me that has been the same since my earliest memories.

This Thursday night's bread for your journey will be all about that process of identifying self. Identifying who I am can be stressful, but it can also be a release. When someone who really cares about you — the real person you are rather than the commodity you might be on someone’s payroll — then the question, “Who are you?” can be a gift instead of an nuisance.

Feel free, if you like, to use the “comment” section of this blog to tell all of us bytheway-ers who you are. What do you like? What are you passionate about? Who are you? I sincerely want to know. I’d love to know what it is that makes you you.

You could also use the comment section to tell everyone who you think by the way is. In a phrase or two, or a sentence or two, what does by the way mean to you? Who do you say we are?  Here’s why that would be really cool if you did that:

By the way almost has a website up and running. Last week, a bunch of people who care a lot about btw got together over dinner, and we worked and played with words and ideas to come up with an identity statement to put on the website. But we knew that statement would not be complete until everyone who is by the way has their say. And that includes you, even if you’ve stumbled upon this blog for the first time… whether you’re a local btw’er or a long distance reader.

You could do this anonymously or give your name and where you live. Something like this:

“By the way is a safe place for me to come and hang on a Thursday night.”  Ebeneezer Smith from Nashua, NH.
OR
“By the way is a blog I read when I can’t sleep at night and I need to know that someone is out there who cares about me and connects me to God”.  Delilah Jones from Cody, Wyoming.
OR
“I personally don’t even know if there is a God at all, but there’s something about btw that keeps me grounded when I’m off balance,”  Jupiter Johnson from Halifax, Nova Scotia.

Get the idea? Then when we get the website up, we can have your input as part of our I.D. Which makes sense, because you all ARE by the way.

Ok, so all this identity stuff really does flow out of a story that shows up in the Bible’s book of Mark, the version of Jesus’ story that we’ve been walking through since June. Take a look. It’s an intriguing story: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Mark%208:27-37&version=MSG

So here’s Jesus checking out his I.D. with those who hang out with him. They all give their input. Then he gets serious, saying that who he is involves some negative stuff that turns out to be positive. That God is all about giving yourself for others. And so that’s who we are, too.

Here’s a piece: “Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how...  Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to saving yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you?...”

Do come, if you can, to get into this more. Btw will be at the Crowne Plaza in Nashua, as usual, Thursday 7pm. And if you can’t be there in person, come back to the blog on the weekend, and we’ll be here.

And thanks, in advance, for taking the time to comment on who by the way  is to you.

Peace in the storm,
Kari

1 comment:

Unknown said...

The question "who am I?" is something that I believe that I have been working on answering my whole life. As someone who has a disability I have struggled with seperating myself into two categories: one being how my disability effects me, and the other being what makes me who I am. Anyone who knows me well would mostly likely tell you that I do not let the fact that I have a disability define who I am as a person. No matter what I am a person first. I believe that applies to everyone, and to anyone who has a disability I hope you feel that way too.

Recently I recieved a service animal. Since getting my dog, I feel that many people now see me as "the girl with the dog." I have noticed that people pass by me altogether and get more excited about my greeting my dog than me. In a way that really hurts my feelings. I have to admit that my dog is unbelievably cute and hard to resist. My dog is also my best friend, but I do not want her to define who I am. She has her own special personality and I am sure if she could talk, she would not want to be defined as "just a guide dog" because that is what she does for work.

In the few months that I have been a participant in By the Way, I feel that I am better able to answer the question of who am I? The different topics each week make me think about about how does this relate to me and what I am currently doing. For me By the Way is a place of personal reflection of who I am and where I am going in my life.

listening and exploring faith together