Love can bring you to your knees. by Heidi Jakoby

You can link to the readings and prayers at http://breadforyourjourney.blogspot.com/

As we came together and reflected on the Eulogy Maria Shrive gave for her mother, it struck me that in the poem there is a line “your love has brought me to my knees,” both love and loss have brought Maria to her knees. How have you been stopped by your emotions or what triggered you to fall to your knees? In the case of Jesus the loss and the love Jesus had for Lazarus brought him to his knees. He was both angry and compassionate simultaneously. Jesus experienced a flood of emotions as he came into the village. So what does this have to do with us?


I thank Helen for commenting on my initial thoughts. It is very difficult to share with anyone a loss that stops you in your tracks. I cannot describe the situation that brought me to my knees. I know what caused it but it is difficult to articulate and even more difficult to share with others. My poor husband witnessed it and he was at a loss for how to help. In many ways there is no way to help in the moment other than to be present and to love a person through it. As the person brought to their knees it is important that you can hang on to a ray of hope that you will get through the next hour, the next day and so forth. Maria Shriver said at the Women’s Conference 2009 round table discussion on Grief, Healing and Resilience, “The real truth is that I am not fine.” She goes on to tell how she is working through the grief. Lisa Niemi, Patrick Swayze’s wife also spoke. Lisa said, “When the grief takes you, it’s like your body is not your own. I’m just going with the flow. I know I have to go through it.” Lisa will also appear on Oprah today, to discuss her life. Maria Shirver shared that Kelly Preston had agreed to join in the roundtable but she had called and said "it was just too painful to talk about Jett, the grief was still too debilitating for her".  http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20315810,00. Everyone grieves differently and time passes differently.

Everyone who has been able to live through the grief generally references, friends and or family who accompanied them through the process of grieving and the passage of time. This week on the Biggest Loser Abby Rike was voted off, she had lost her husband and children and she used food to cope and the opportunity to be on the Biggest Loser helped her, “join life again”, check out her story http://tvwatch.people.com/2009/10/29/biggest-losers-abby-rike-i-have-rejoined-life/
 .

The reason I chose the second reflection the song Soul Cakes by Sting is some of the commentary I heard from Sting. Soul cakes were put outside the house for the souls that had been lost but were really there for those in need. The people who needed food would eat the soul cakes and say a prayer for the family. It is interesting that there are many traditions around remembering the dead. I know I grew up going to the cemetery regularly to honor my grandparents, who I really did not know in life. I only recently realized that not every family had rituals around remembering those who had died. I find it comforting to reflect on what those who have died had taught me. I feel that I honor their life whenever I pass on what they have taught me. Sting talks about winter as a time of reflection you can link to this interview to hear more about his motivation behind this new cd http://edition.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Music/10/29/sting.music/.

I would encourage you to spend some time thinking about what you have gained from those you have lost. Take a few minutes and write down what you want others to learn from you and continue to give that to others. Also, what did you learn from a loss that you remember often and want to share with others?

I know that my understanding of God’s love helped me through my difficult times and I want to share that lesson with others.

May you find peace and comfort this week.

What loss has brought you to your knees? by Heidi Jakoby

This week we are exploring loss and grief. What kinds of losses have you experienced in your life? Did it have a physical affect on you? How have you gotten through that grief?

As I read and reflected on the lesson for this week John11:32-44 http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John11:32-44&version=MSG this is the story of Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead. The part of this story that makes me wonder is Jesus physical reaction to the death of Lazarus. Jesus wept and he was physically disturbed by the death of Lazarus.

At the Women’s Conference 2009 http://www.californiawomen.org/  this week Maria Shriver and others spoke about their grief over the loss of a loved one and how they have been getting through each day.

I read the following in the Los Angeles Times: “Maria Shriver has long sought to protect her privacy as California's First Lady, but today she brought thousands to tears with an extraordinary evocation of her grief two months after the death of her mother, Eunice Kennedy Shriver. During a luncheon session at the Women's Conference she is chairing in Long Beach, Shriver told attendees that she stood before them "with a broken heart." She said she has told people that she is holding up well, but "the real truth is that I'm not fine.”

"The real truth is that my mother's death has brought me to my knees," she said. "I had feared this my entire life. . . . She was my hero, my role model, my very best friend. I spoke to her every single day of my life. I tried really hard when I grew up to make her proud of me." Maria Shriver has long sought to protect her privacy as California's First Lady, but today she brought thousands to tears with an extraordinary evocation of her grief two months after the death of her mother, Eunice Kennedy Shriver. (Here is the link to the entire article http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-maria-shriver28-2009oct28,0,5125731.story?track=rss  )

Has grief or loss brought you to your knees? I know this has happened at least once in my life and when I think back to that day I need to not think of it for too long or else I can get lost there. Going on with grief is never easy but I know that those I have lost have taught me many things, but I still grieve.

Please comment on these thoughts and questions and consider joining us for Bread for your Journey this Thursday night at the Crowne Plaza Nashua NH 7PM. See you there.